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Recently

2011-12-08T00:32:00.001+08:00

Recently, things doesn't really go tat right again. Seem like this year, is a not a good year for me. Things just happen one after one. Somehow before I go tw, I want to ensure that my parents can survive well and take gd care of themselves while I am away home for 11 days.Maybe bcos of my bad experience in hk, some of sort of I amQuite afraid of going oversea with friends yet I want to try how it feel to go with friends. With friends, u will have the freedom of buy Wat without someone nagging at u. Yet if u go with mummy, u will have to be a big girlLooking after her. Hopefully I will not screw up this 10 yrs of friendship. Maybe I am a person who is hard to get along? Haiz...At work wise, nothing seems to be right.. Hahaha.. I can sense tat me and my colleagues actually drift further. Hahaha.. Time to find another job? Seems tat this pay can no longer support Wat I need. So maybe I should look for something else tat can offer me better As for relationship wise, I heard that he gt married recently. I amHappy for him, that he gt married. It been like more than 6 yrs, Hw can I haven forget a person yet. At tat point, when I heard tat he gt married. I start to recall how nice is to me. Maybe bcos in ugly duckling life, she dun have such a guy who look after her before? No any other guys treat her tat well, so even though she knows tat he dun love her at all. She dragged a 3 yrs ties with him.. Mayb tat's why after I heard the news, I did depress for quite sometime.. Maybe brothers they all had replaced him and Justin's position in my heart. But I will nvr forget their kindness towards me. As for home wise, granny been wanting to go home. Haiz... Hopefully she can understand that not we don't want to brim her home. Is we cannot look after her at home. Sometimes life is tat cruel. When u want to go, yet the heaven want u to stay. Sometime seeing the poor ladies, I was thinking why not let them go. But if I let her go, my heart will be into pieces. Such a big dilemma. Haiz.. Why things just work the way they Used to be? Sometimes maybe to be a kid is better than to be an adult.

It had been quite a while

2011-10-24T00:42:00.002+08:00

Yesterday morning, i had a nightmare that scare me out of my bed in the morning. Although i suppose to meet my friend in the morning for breakfast and helped him to settle some study stuffs, ended up i push the meeting from 9.30am to 10.30am.

A few years ago, these two persons who i saw in my nightmare were the most important people in my life. But at this moment, they are no longer important to me. Or rather i should say that i am no longer important to them. Everyone leading a good life now, why should i still look backward about what had happened? Or is a hint telling me something not good going to happen?

Recently, i had slow down my pace at work. What happened to me? Somehow, i lose my motivation and passion at work, i no longer worked that hard. But yet i am afraid i will lose my job. Without a job, i guess i will no longer be able to provide for the homes money for my mum nor be able to survive through. I start with a pathetic pay in 2005, yet at this moment, my pay is still not fantastic but i still cannot be able to survive through with what i had now. What happened to me, last time i can barely survive with that amount yet now i can't? Because of the bad economy or inflation or i had started to look at stuffs that are much more expensive?

Maybe i know even at the end of the year, i will still not be able to meet my boss's expectation to get promote. No matter how hard i try to work, i will never be able to get recognize by my bosses. What is the point of working so hard? Maybe i am stupid, so i need to work harder to get a 3 as compare to others. Or i had limitation using in my language for communication. I guess i need to buck up on my english vocabulary in order to push me up for the promotion.

As for relationship wise, i don't dare to think too far. I had been out of love for quite a long period of time. I don't even know what is the feeling to be in love again. Now i only want a peaceful life, i will know i will lonely at a time when my parents left me but this is parts and parcel of life. now i am contented to live under the care and love shower by my parents.

Somehow, love and career doesn't work well for me at this moment. But i will try harder to make my career work. While for love, nothing can be force.

As for taiwan trip, i also don't dare to think so much. Somehow i know that my friend who are sharing room with me and his sister got gf. I started to feel scare about it. If i am his gf, i guess i will be jumping up and down, while my bf was with another gal. But his gf can don't need to worry, i won't be able to attract a guy who is like her bf. He is a good guy, there won't be anything happen.

Opps, somehow i am disappointed that such a good catch is already taken. But too bad, i am not someone who will approach first. haha.. even if i will make the first move, don't think he will like me also. hahaha.. when will an ugly ducking turn to be a swan? that will only appear in fairy tale.

I should concentrate to be a career woman instead of thinking so much.

As for my granny, she is still the same. Sounds contradicting but somehow i still wish i can meet the correct one and bring him to show her. I hope she will be able to see that day before she leave me.

Ah ma, without you, i will never be able to be who i am now. I am grateful to you, without your love, i guess i will be a different person and head a different path.

My tears rolled down last nite

2011-07-31T13:26:00.002+08:00

After so long, I had lost contact with k... This is the first time someone makes me cry... Should I be happy or should I be sad.. K had no longer had a place in my heart.. Somehow this person had slowly taken over his place, jus tat I did not notice it? Bcos he had been always there for me... Or I am jus being emotional.. Seems like I need to siam him far far away... I dun wan to get hurt... Since I know this is going to be a no ending road, why should I still continue.. Sometimes friend is still a friend.. Dun ever mix up a friend with a lover... friend is friend.... lover is lover... Maybe if Ytd nite, I dun meet up with him... At least I won't feel so bad ba? I think this time round, I had hide it away till very good... My tears only roll down when I reached hm and hide in the room... Luckily it didn't last me tat long ba... Maybe i will take a shorten time to forget him than I used to forget k?

Last nite I was telling my friend, maybe I go tw.. I will create a miracle, find a tw Bf bacK.. At least that will
Be the confirm ending between us.. he can busy entertain her... I can keep
Myself busy accompany my Bf... Then at least my feelings toward should be able to
Fade it as time passby.....

Jealousy? Or being kpo?

2011-07-24T23:29:00.002+08:00

Sort of I feeling very angry abt last nite... So long I nvr had this kind of feeling again on the same guy... This is crazy... Is it bcos I too concern for this friend or I fall in love with this guy? Do I bother? I am very shy towards my relationship.. But sort of nowadays I slightly dare to admit a bit.. When my friend asked me a question who I will choose.. I told
Them a name.. Hahaha.. Guess they will stun too.. Of course I will want to find a guy who will dotes me and shower me with love and care... I am like a baby.. I think I am a very easily contented woman..

This Yr, I went to fortune teller regarding abt two matters, one of them is regarding about work, while
Another one is abt relationship. She told me I dun have any special feelings with them.. I think maybe she wants to indirectly tell
Me they will not be interested in me.. Otherwise I won't feel tat uncomfortable. I sort of had a quarrel with one
Of them last nite, and I jus walk off with my friend.. I still tot my friends they all will
Mistaken my relationship with her.. But none of them
Asked.. Neither did he SMS me anythig regarding abt last nite... Hahaha.. Being concern as friend, I asked him to
Go.. Dun drink le.. Yet he dun even bother.. Then i just walked off... Why should I still stand there being kpo.. Furthermore, I also gt a curfew to keep..

Guess is time to keep myself away frm these two friends.. After next sat's birthday celebration, I must Siam
Liao.. I dun mix up my feeling with neither one of them.. Otherwise I will be so dead.. Or I jus dun want to get myself hurt.. Anyway they jus treat me as friend.. Why should I care and bother so much?

Career Woman or ??

2011-06-20T00:06:00.001+08:00

Erm... Am i a career woman? Actually i am not but i know i must find ways to try to improve my pay. Otherwise how can i afford to support my parents. Seriously started to feel so scary as my parents growing older each day. Do i have enough money for them if they are hospitalise? Do i have enough money if my dad retired? Do i have enough money if one day my parents need to stay in nursing home? There is nothing the government can do for us. All the bills are increasing tremendously high. If i have a normal pay person, i can't support my parents.

Hahaha :D

2011-05-21T15:49:00.002+08:00

Kekeke... I had sort of my tots.. Lalala.. Tat kind of feelings I had for him is superficial... Otherwise next wk complimentary movie tickets, I will ask him to accompany me to attend.. Hahaha... Instead of him, I had asked a friend to accompany me to watch it with me.. Hahahaha...

Sometimes friend will just maintain as friends...

CRAZY

2011-04-23T12:18:00.002+08:00

I had a breakdown in office on monday, at first i thought i will be able to stay in my current company till i retired but guess now this option is not in my list. Walk out of the meeting room, will cause me to lose a chance for promotion or i will always be a developer. Forever staying a developer will makes my pay remain the same. Nothing changes. Haiz.. Seems like after bonus, i will have to find another job.

As for at home, nothing changes much, nowadays i will be spending more time with my cousins and at home. What happened recently shocked all of us. Even my auntie is flying back from aus, normally she will only come back a few yrs. Nowadays she flew back quite often. haiz~~ life is short, should learn to cherish things. cos u will nvr wat happened next.

As for relationship, hahahaa.. i also dunno.. is it bcos i feeling low, that's why i gt this kind of feelings. Tat day, seriously i not drunk before i head to st james. maybe just high ba... wahahaha.. :D i trying to pull his hand and another girl hand together.. hahaha... if one day they hand in hand together, i also dunno maybe i will feel happy for him or ...................i will not let my relationship ended hw my previous relation ended. Most likely, i will stand away, wait till i am more clear minded. hahahaa, base on that day, if he drove me home instead of st james, i will love this person.. hahaha.. but he drove me to st james, which means i am nothing to him... hahaha... find a way to forget him ba..

ytd, i went out with my cousins they all. My aunt looks very stone and very sian. Within 3 wks, you lost a brother and husband, nobody will understand how she felt. She is just trying to act strong in front of everyone of us. Cos she needs to take care of 2 kids. Will i encounter 3 adults cried in my aunt's hotel room later? haiz~~~

The most scarily month that i ever had in my life

2011-04-17T03:23:00.002+08:00

3 weeks after my uncle's funeral, we stepped into another funeral. Can't imagine that is happening to us again. The families getting smaller and smaller. People just go like this. My uncle been staying at NUH for 8 or 9 days. The last two days, he admitted to ICU. First time, i stepped into ICU, seeing how people struggle their life to survive. This time round, is so sudden. Last sunday, i went to see him with my mum. He was still ok, he still smile at me. This week, i am attending his funeral. Looks like is a joke or a drama in life. How can be possible one by one just left us within a month. Seriously i doubt i can take another blow so soon. Hahaha, that day my granny was still telling me, she wants to go. Cos her eyes are very painful. Now i really dunno how to react. If 3 weeks down the road, i going to attend funeral again. I doubt i will have the stamina to survive through, maybe i should say thanks to someone. Maybe without him training me to be that strong, i doubt i will be that strong. Now wat i can do is to look after my the families.

Seriously, i really doubt the standard that hospital provides. How can a small wound become so serious? How can a small wound become a killer? How a small wound become heart attack? If the doctors start to cure his leg first before asking him to go for this and that scan, maybe things will not be that serious?

Just now i saw my cousin, looking at her graduation photo and stone. I felt so sad.

I started to look back at my life, i feel that the most happiest birthday that i ever had is on my 21th birthday where everyone are there to celebrate with me.. Such a pity that i never took photos.

My auntie and uncle are actually my godmother and godfather.

lao tian ye.. pls.............

Haiz..

2011-03-28T00:59:00.002+08:00

So many things happened recently.. sort of i cannot catch up with my breath.. sort of feeling to runaway from everything. I wants to take a break, after it then think how to clean up the mess. hahaha.. sound like this time round i had made a big mess..

The biggest that i made till now, might be the decision to go hk with my cousins they all. Maybe that incidents screwed up our relationship. Trying to runaway from problems, that is something that i am good at.

This time round, i am pretty surprise that i am quite strong. Or because everything happened too fast till i dunno how to react.

Guess this time round, i can write a long long story.. From young i used to go that place around this period of time. I will go there worship my grandfather. Now when i go there, feelings is so different. Seeing how sad is my cousins, i dunno wat to say. i been very stone there, so scare that i will say something wrong again. i dunno how to react, things kept floating in my mind. At the moment, my granny float in my mind. In a selfish thinking, i did asked why heaven don't swap the sequence. i think my granny will not be able to take it. She miss my uncle so much, if now she knows that he had passed away. This is going to be a very big blow to her. Now, all the siblings are so sad about this incident. My aunt even worst, she is alone in aus with her family. Now she knew about my uncle incident, she linked it with her son incident. Haiz.. I hopes July bonus is good, maybe i should take my mum for a holiday break. Maybe this time round, i will consider perth. We shall go there and visit my aunt's family. This been a very big blow to my cousin but i admire her courage and strong. Luckily they found someone who loves them a lot, will take care of them. Otherwise, i can't imagine wat will happen. My aunt been very steady, trying to settle everything by herself. Although granny always tell me, hw my aunt dun like her. I think my aunt also hate me, the stare that she gave me during these few days, i dunno wat to say. Especially the last day, the stare is scary.

I know why she hates me. From young, all bcos of my granny and my mum, i managed to go holiday trips during school holiday. My uncle brought me to bali, cameron highland, genting, cruise to penang.. He did a lot to help my family. When i am young, i owe a lot to mother's side. without them, i will not have all those memories.

My first roller coaster ride .. when i first learn how to cycle.. go pulau ubin explore.. hahaa.. all these memories are given by him.. if u asked me his gone, is it a big blow to me also? Yes, i regret i nvr cherish it. Bcos of the hk incident, i been escaping not to go my uncle's house. only till last yr, when i knew he was sicked,i went down with my mum to see him. He was very weak at that moment.. i am very useles.. whenever i hit any difficulties, i keep trying to runaway from it. During the funeral, i told my uncle, i will look after my granny. Now, i will try to spend more time with her, at least she dun feel so empty.

If one day,i lose her, what will happen to me? I also dunno. Collapse? Went Crazy? Get myself drunk? Or swallow down all my tears?

Complicated Feelings

2011-03-07T02:11:00.002+08:00

这几天，我去了红白喜事。。去了红事，让我想嫁可是我还没遇到那个人。。其实我曾经很爱他，我想过嫁给他。我不可能为了他一直停留在六年前。哈哈，我一向来都不喜欢输，因为我来不及先说出口，所以我输了。我并不是很爱你，只是是我错，我心里有了那个遗憾，让我那么难受。。

白事让我想起了我公公和外婆。。但我公公被火化时，我想起小时候，他疼我的时候。小时候妈妈和爸爸都没有空时，是他带我回家，煮饭给我吃。公公煮的炸鸡翅膀最好吃了。每当星期五时，他都会载我去我党姐家带她们来他家住。

外婆，她给我的回忆是我永远都忘不了的。她很疼我，我可以说她每个人都很疼。当爸爸生病时，是她陪在我跟妈妈身别，照顾我们母女。 when i have chicken pox, she will be telling my mother what are the rules and asked me to follow them. She told me not to look into the mirror and i cannot meet up with any people. My gd friend came over and visit me and keep me accompany thru the days. The older i am, i started to doubt i will be so fortunate ma?

If one day, she pass away, will i be as strong as my friend? Or i will just collapse? Or i already been through one round, so this round shouldn't affect me that bad? But my relationship with her is stronger than my grandfather a lot more. She did a lot of things for me before. i always think that in this world.. nobody else will care for me as much as her.. hahaa.. maybe if one day she pass away, i dun think i am as lucky as my friend.. have so many pple standby her. being very selfish, i hopes my granny tat she will pass away soon. seeing her under so much pain, it hurts me badly. she is so old already, why do she still have to suffer so much? when i am ard 13, she suffers from Rheumatism.. only till last yr, she fell down.. her condition got deteriorate faster than i expected.. at first, i wished that she will live till the day i get marry. now,i wish heaven will let her go.. why.. u let her suffer so much pain.. ytd she was asking me.. will they come and visit her? she misses her kids and grandchildren.. but none of them visiting her often.. i understand the adults all are weak and sick.. wat abt her grandchildren? really nobody wants to care abt her? i feel is so saddening... she gt viral infection at her eyes.. she hardly see well now.. is so painful but she jus keep quiet.. don't even mention anything about it.. the stronger i see her.. the more i must learn..

i............

2011-01-21T01:06:00.003+08:00

hahaaha... being very childish.. i am very afraid that i will fall in love with my gd friends.. hahaha.. first time being away from home for so many days.. first time i stepped out of airport, the person i saw was not my parents yet is my gd friend.. hahaa.. =D he was waiting for me there which i am very surprise.. hahaa.. seems like i am very happy when i switch on my phone.. i saw his sms.. he asked me whether i reached airport or not.. haahahaa..

as for my the other good friend... when i reached home carpark.. he is already at my house here.. i am so surprise.. hahahaa.. he will reach there earilier than me...

hahahaa.. i can't fall in love with gd friend.. yet i think they too pamper me.. i scare one day.. if they are attached.. i need to get drunk again?

Maybe is time for me to widen my circle of friends.. Hahaha.. Since the fortune teller already tell me that Nt likely I will be able to get
Marry or so call settle down...

New year

2011-01-02T13:06:00.002+08:00

Haha.... it had been very long tat I ever spend my Xmas or new year with my gd friends.. Erm.. I think the last time that we spend Xmas together was my last trip to bkk which was like 5 yrs ago when I am still working at my last company... Haaha.. Feeling is really different.. Nw
I started to know Wat kind of feelings I have.. Haaha....

Last year was it a good year for me.. Erm.. I dun think so.. Things wasn't
Tat great.... Maybe the first half year was pretty good but the second half year wa pretty screw up. Haizzzz .... Too many things happening ard.. I think I might need to find another to cover the highly incurred living costs or I had to cut down my extravagant spendthrift attitude.. First step to my success is to stop my spending speed.. Otherwise one day I will end up in debts.. =x

As for work wise, I know I will not have a chance to go for promotion this year.. Haiz.. Everything will be normal ba.. Now is hoping I dun get a very ugly grade for my apa.. If I didn't pass my exam.. Most likely I will have to quit my job.. I dun have the face to stay in the company anymore.. Haiz.. Really pray hard I will be able to get it done over with it.. 1.6k, I can pay for 7 mths of my granny nursing home charges..

As for relationship wise... Hahaha.. At the current moment, I haven't
Met the correct one.. Last wk, I went to fortune teller.. Haha.. So stupid.. But I believe wat she said... Naive? Maybe indeed I am really naive... Haha... She said once I did love the other person very deeply but ended he was being taken by others.. Haha.. Min
Now u dun have to tell yrself tat he gt all other reasons why he just left u in this manner.. Leaving a
Mystery for u to solve.. Haha.. No matter of how. I still have to face the truth and let go of it.. Otherwise I will not be able to start a new one.. :)

Erm.......

2010-12-15T02:25:00.002+08:00

sha gua 有个死穴.. 其实我很怕,我没有把握会及格,无论如何我也要拼了命去考吧.. 希望我不会让大家失望..

有一个人陪了我二十六年, 最近她生病了.. 可能有一天,她会把我忘了.. 可是我一定不会忘了她曾经给我的爱.当我爸爸进医院时,是她陪在我和妈妈的生边. 每次她一定会在我们身边,遮风挡雨.. 也是应为她,我才有机会出国.. 每当我在房里时,我会想起她.. 如果有一天她真的走了,我会撑得下去吗?

wo hao bu kai xin

2010-10-18T01:08:00.003+08:00

hahaa.. seriously acting in front of everyone, i am ok.. really looks so fake.. haha..

today my cousin told me.. she wondering whether my granny will survive thru next year chinese new year or not? hahaa.. should i be happy or should i be sad or maybe i should really ponder about this question? to me, family is very impt to me. maybe bcos from young, i am being shield from stormy days by family. she told me, once my granny pass away, we will not celebrate cny anymore. if one day, my granny pass away, will i be able to take it? or i will still be able to be professional to act as nothing happened and move on with it.

我老了，我也应该了解生死病老是常有的事。。

忘了你

2010-10-17T13:38:00.002+08:00

忘了你，让我从新的站起来也变得更加坚强。可是最进这些事情把我累坏了。我很贪心很想你在我身边以一个朋友的身份教教我应该如何做。Haiz.... 烦烦。。 

A Dream

2010-10-11T00:50:00.003+08:00

最近我的伤口一直被挖开,可是我已经把他忘了,从新开始生活了.. 可是昨天的一场梦把我吓坏了.. 我梦见他和别人结婚了,也有一个幸福的家..我一直哭个不停,我是真的哭,还是在梦里哭.. 可是起来时我的眼睛好干... 其实如果当初我听了korkor 的话,说不定我现在已经得到我的幸福了.. 哈哈.. 可能,我对自己太过有信心了,以为他对我好是因为他喜欢我... 傻傻的还以为,他就是我的老公.. 哈哈... 我真的觉得我好苯,好天真.. 现在的我,没有想躲在爱人的环抱,我想躲在家里和朋友的环里.. 我是真的有很多很好的男性朋友, 可是我们都不会有开花结果的.. 因为经历了和他的事,我开始分不清什么是爱情与友情.. 而且,我没有那个美丽吸引到任何一位男人...

今年，应该不会有那么多人陪我过生日，今年我应该会跟家里人庆祝吧。。也会躲在genting到我生日那一天才回来跟papa度过吧。可能是应为家里这几个月家里发生了很多事，从我才一点失去了我的最爱，到她好了很多。。是时候在家里多陪一下我爱的人。。

其实如果以前我没有假假的想知道你对我的感觉，可能我们还是好朋友。。现在我对你的影响也开始越来越模糊了。。我只有记得你说过的，min ai zai.. 不如老天爷，你给我一杯忘情水，把你给我的回忆洗掉，还是给我一个比你更疼爱我的人出现在我面前。。

Erm...

2010-09-30T01:04:00.002+08:00

Erm... Nowadays my sunday are burn out. Most of the time, i will spend my time at old folks home. Time passes very fast, it had been one month she stayed there. But from her face, i can see that she is not very willingly to stay there. Not too bad, i still manage to send her mooncake on mooncake's festival. If one day, i can get marry? will she still be at my side? on last sat, i am still so proud of myself that i can finally forget about him. at this moment, suddenly feel so empty, hoping that someone will be with me.. whenever i go visit her.. although she never open her mouth asking where is my the other half, i guess she would wants me to find one and settle down.

School going to start soon, i will be more busy as compare to now. My team lead trying to pull me back to the grade that i had for this year.. i had to try harder to push for my apa if i am planning to stay in this company.. all of these will be a big question mark.. whether i will stay here till july or not..

Old Folks Home

2010-08-24T02:05:00.002+08:00

Later in the afternoon, my granny will discharge from nuh. Then she will goes to there immediately she discharge.. Heart seriously feel very painful.. Now start to scare she cannot get use to there. sometimes maybe min arh.. u are just being useless. you can't take care of her.. when u are young, who protect you from your parents? who buy you computer when u need for studies? Who looks after you when your dad is in hospital? who always give u extra pocket money? who always buy breakfast for you when she is here? who always throw tantrum to her, yet she never scold you before? who always be there for you? who will help your family to solve problems within her means? who always make milo for you in the morning? who always make bread for you in the morning?

who who who who who.. who had been wu wei bi zhi de cao gu ni..

who who who who who who..

haiz...

2010-08-23T00:17:00.002+08:00

today ah ma told me that she knows she going to stay at old folks home after she is being discharge... but she told me that she will be able to go back home.. once she recover.. my tears almost dropped out... actually i should knows the only time when she can goes back is only went she left me.. suddenly i feel so empty.. thinking abt someone nagging at me when i came back from work.. someone who will make milo for me before i go work.. someone who will make bread for me.. someone who will take care of min.. min arh.. so old, everyday still crying.. seriously hor.. after ks left me, i never felt so painful till the day went my ah ma fell down and when i know she is going old folks home... is it bcos i have very negative feelings towards old folk home or ??? i feel like depending on someone.. haha.. who can i depend on? my heart is so painful...

Feeling sad

2010-08-17T02:20:00.003+08:00

Hahaa.. Recently been very emotional especially the day when i know grandma's admitted hospital. Actually i should get use to people will die one day and we still have to move on in life. But don't know why, everyday i will just cry behind my blanket. She is still ok but just bedridden in hospital. Something very sad is that once she discharge, she will be place in old folks home. I feel so painful but i couldn't said anything. Staying in old folks home, only good thing is that got someone to look after her. But.... sometimes at night you will see pple pass away, is tat good for one person mentally? or she already had prepared for the worst?

Recently i been very hardworking that almost everyday, i will go visit her. Next time when she moves to old folks home, how can i go and visit her everytime?

Min feels very remorseful.. Seriously when i am young, i am very rebellious.. she had a hard time to take care of me when i am young. guess this will be my breakdown point. Can't imagine that if suddenly i lost her, how long will be my breakdown point? These few days i kept thinking of the memories that she gave me, i wants to keep them and she is the only one beside my parents who dotes me. When i am young, she will try to give me watever i wants, so now i am old, i will try to give her watever she wants and she needs..

ah ma, wo ai ni .. ni shi zui teng wo de. ni bu yao you shi, wo ba zhi ji hui cheng bu zhu.

Confused Puzzled

2010-07-19T02:07:00.002+08:00

I had a confused feeling, wondering whether do i like him or ? hahaa.. comedy.. min arh min.. u told yrself before u will not fall in love with any of yr gd friend.. step out hor.. dun step into the line again for fire.. hahahaahaa..

this feeling should be able to fade away soon ba~~~ hopefully i can meet the correct one soon.. otherwise i will die arh.. =x

其实我心里还放不下`。。

2010-07-06T01:53:00.002+08:00

哈哈。。我是真的爱上他，还是我依赖他？心里真的感到怪怪的。。我们两也分开了那么久，为什么心里还是怪怪的。是我不肯放开手还是应为我还没有谈恋爱。。可能自己没有那个魅力，吸引到你。如果我们在一起又会有这么的结局？说不定我们还是以分手的结局收场。。

就像我跟korkor有同一样的结局。在也没有像以前那么好了。。我同时间失去了两个好朋友。。

心里有何感觉？我也不清楚。。

其实min没有那么坚强

2010-06-19T02:23:00.005+08:00

哈哈!! 我觉得有些时候我非常地好胜,可是其实我也有软弱的一面. 我好像把它深深埋起来,不可别人看到我那一面. 最近也发生了很多事情,我也有一点吓坏了. 那天,我拿了半天,冲忙得赶下去NUH. 因为早上外婆就不舒服了,一大清早就说要去医院.妈妈说她可以应付,叫我别谈心,放心的去做工. 心理好担心可是还是硬着头皮去做工,要到下午时,我给妈妈打给电话,她说她还没看医. 也找不到我叔叔,所以我就拿了半天,下去医院. 到了那里,我看着妈妈担心的脸孔,坐在那里等着我来.我带着她们去了急症室求医. 一副不怕的表情,cool cool 的登记.我还被护士说你不会英文阿! 真是他妈的,老人家不好意思说出口,我那里会知道.

人与人之间的相处就象在走在危险的干丝，一不小心的踩错一步就会把两人之间的脆弱的瓜关系给破坏了

life....

2010-05-09T01:41:00.002+08:00

Recently, i starts school already. Can imagine that i study for so long yet, i still haven't graduate.. Really is miss stupid.. Miss stupid put all her heart in work or she just dun like to study?

As for work.. i also dunno hw to said.. Have here become my comfort zone that i dun wish to move? or ????

Hahaha.. Actually i am a woman that xin dong very easily.. Am i someone easy to understand or someone very hard to understand. He seems to understand me so well. Or just by coincidence that he knows me too well. But we two won't be possible to be together. I dun wish history reappear again. Once is enough, i had learnt my lesson. Time to move forward, find a good guy and settle down. Don't act to be cool.. Hahaha..

A few weeks ago, mummy told me that they are planning to put my granny to old folk homes.. I feel so sad.. cried a few nights.. I also know that granny's health deteriorating as time passes.. But i really hopes she can see me settle down before she left me..

haiz.... headache~~~

.....

2010-03-24T00:45:00.002+08:00

Really speechless.. i also don't know what i wants in life.. Pls enlighten me..

Hahaha.. Really Crappy leh.. the insurance acting like my close friend like that.. Talk so much rubbish with me.. or recently, i become more and more crappy.. =x

hai~~ recently quite sad.. my back once in while, will give me problem... sob sob.. seems like my health is giving me green light.. =x

love? like? old feelings?

2010-02-16T03:27:00.001+08:00

dunno why today mood jus feeling not good.. maybe recently happened too many things and too sudden.. ytd i had a dream that i met him and he introduce me his gf to me. Izzit bcos i still couldn't forget about him? Am i really so stubborn? Or he really hurts me so badly? Or i am just so crazy about him? or i just being emo?

ytd i went out with someone after i came back from my auntie's house. Haha.. somehow, i dunno why.. i gt feelings towards him.. when looking at him.. question starts to float in my mind. Is he the correct one? or only one sided? or ?? my mind just went haywire.. haha.. he said my face looks very sad.. cny saw my face also sian.. haha.. maybe bcos of the past, i will think carefully before i stepped into a new relationship? i met my neighbours at macdonald. Opps, guess everyone will think that he is my bf. Erm.. before he went to meet his friends, he just mumble something but i really dunno what he is trying to said. i.............. haiz....

work... recently been really too stressed up for me.. and studies really forcing me quite badly.. hopefully after this wk, i will feel better...

Tough

2010-02-11T01:26:00.002+08:00

Tough is the only word i can describe how i feel now.. haha..

Seriously i am standing at a very difficult position.. I choose not to gave up my freedom but now struggling damn hard to finish my assignment. Haiz~~

Stepping into another project really bring me big trouble. In this fire-fighting project, i really learn a lot of things. haha.. Can i finish or not.. haha... =D

Singapore flyer

2010-02-08T02:01:00.002+08:00

This place had a certain meanings for me. Before it
is build, I always hope he is the one who going to accompany me to the top
of the flyer but this did not come true. Haha..

How have i been recently

2010-01-29T02:26:00.002+08:00

Erm.. Recently been busy with studies and work. Hahaah... Sad hor.. this year cny cum vday.. nobody accompany me to celebrate my vday..

Today very funny.. i was trying to check my air ticket to bkk.. Therefore,i need to go out and send email.. keekekekee.. =D Uncle came in wor.. lol.. =D he saw me go to job website.. hahaha.. sometimes is happy to see uncle.. he very nice.. but there are times his face very black. Consider he is approachable.. he asked me.. really got so bad that cannot tahan until june.. Actually hor.. i also dunno whether i will change my job or not. But at the current moment, guess all of us are very tired.. tat's why we keep saying we wants to change of environment.. seriously now still not as bad as wat i had in my ex-company..

Surprising..

2010-01-11T12:31:00.002+08:00

Haha.. Surprisingly, this year i head my friends advice. haha.. I trying to keep myself from eating that often and cut down on my intake.. haha.. is time to control my appetite. 自甘堕落了那么久，应该觉悟了吧！糊里糊涂得过了大半辈子，我真的还要这样的过下去吗？ haha.. recently, Light challenge me.. haha.. I told him i am on diet.. haha... he gave me one year plus he said i confirm cannot make it. these few years, korkor nagging.. my gd pals challenge.. even my close friend also left me.. my poly friends saying.. haha.. i still did not do anything towards till everyone also give up on me.. now suddenly someone challenge me again.. if i still dun do anything hor.. i think i am hopeless.. Now i need to prove to myself that i am not hopeless.. If i have the determination, i can do something towards it. No matter is bcos of my happiness or wat. I believe this will help out in my health. As my health started to give me warning that my heart getting weaker le.. still dun do anything hor... guess one day, i will be lying at the operation table waiting for heart transplant le..

Being very stupid... i went to visit fortune teller last weekend.. wahaha.. :P That lady was telling me.. someone is going after u, right? i said no.. haha.. i am still single.. she said my fate will fly from oversea.. haha.. do u mean him? haha.. i no longer contact with him le.. Guess he already got married le.. My cousin asked me a stupid question on xmas eve. If he is back, will u still wants to get back with him. I said "No". He will no longer be the person who i like/love at that time. So many years had gone, maybe i haven changed or maybe i bcome worst. More childish, more petty, look worst.. haha.. But definitely he will change.. in the first place, he already more mature than me.. Something which i dun willingly to let go is, he taught me to become more mature than i am, learning to be more independent, dun always be a crybaby. I just miss those stupid periods.. haha.. someone pamper me and someone who will always be there for me. but when something bad happens on him.. he will never need me to be at his side. Haha.. maybe i can conclude that when min is down, friends are ard her. But when her friends are down, she is unreachable or not contactable. Tat's why pple leave her. And now she is trying hard to recoup the loses.

As for career wise, she said i had the thinking of quitting. Haha.. I did have the tot of leaving and runaway from things. This is something i am very capable. Running away is also the way which i wants when things turn upside down. Haha.. But she said at the current environment, i am not that stress and not that worst. But of cos there are always downfall. Overall, here is still not so bad. Hahaha.. I agreed, here of cos not as bad as my previous company. I been thru so many hardship there le, while here a little bit, i already feel like giving up. So TIMID!! haha.. :D Mainly bcos of my gd friends are over there. They are my motivation to work, they will be there with me. Haha.. :P while here, i dun really had a lot of friends ba..
haha.. Sometimes my ex-colleagues will meet up with me for lunches or dinner.. I feel that i am not forgotten.. Hahaa.. Going back to my ex-company? Hahaa.. Unless my director offers me to go back. Otherwise i doubt, i will go back ba. So ma lu, walked one big round, still goes back there. Furthermore, there used to be hell for me and i grumble so much lor.. :P

Min, Jia you.. No matter how hard is it, friends will stand by you. Hahaha.. That was what one of my friends told me.. :P

kekekee.. :D

Happy New Year~~

2010-01-02T01:31:00.003+08:00

kekee..谢谢你... =) 你放开了我.. =p 我也希望我可以慢慢的放开了你。。也希望新的一年我也可以找到一个疼我，爱我的男人。。 =）

Last weekend

2009-12-21T00:44:00.002+08:00

It had been ages that my aunty and my cousin came back to singapore for a
short trip. This time mainly bcos my auntie's mother-in-law condition consider quite bad. They came back to visit them
and my granny. This month, I bought a lot of Xmas gifts
mainly for family member. Tat include one for
my cousin. After he passed away, this is the first time his sister visits
sg. When I am young, auntie dotes everyone a lot. Mainly bcos of that or maybe bcos I am a crybaby, when I knew
he passed away. It affects me quite badly. Guess that blow is worst towards my auntie. Furthermore, we are not there together with her. She always wish us to go over an visits her. I was telling her if next year got chance, we will
go over there and visits them. Min arh min, must work hard, faster finish yr degree and earn more
money. I hopes they are happy with the shopping spree. Min dun really step in
the branded goods shop. Just accompany my cousin walked around. Hopes she likes the bag sher
bought. She leads a very simple life now.. Last time she still have a brother to bicker.. Actually life
is really short.. I wants them to be happy. Haha... Min trying to act
fillal or too sensitive towards things ard her?

Ytd I walked one whole day at orchard. Haha.. I gt a friend like a kid... Haha.. Seriously, I also dunno.. My feelings are very weird.. Haha.. Mainly bcos of an incident occurs a few years back.. I dun wish to enter one sided relationship again. At one moment, I really have tat kind of feelings toward him.. Haha.. But I know both of us will not be together. I still trying to match make him with someone else. Haha.. I really dun have the fate to meet the right or the correct one haven
appears ba.. Haha.. Ytd he really very nice to me.. Haha... But guess both of us knows our stand very well. He treats
me like a sis, futhermore he already gt someone in his heart. While
me, I also dunno.. I am quite sensitive to one word ks.. Haha... Dun mention him
in front of me. I wish to have a new beginning. Tat time is jus one sided love ba. Haha.. Maybe tat time I should head my friends's advice then I will
not hit so badly. Or maybe I am a person who dunno how to cherish things or I am very stupid. So next time relationship problems, pls be frank to me. Otherwise, I really dunno what it means.

Today, I wheel my granny to parkway to have lunch. She was very happy. Thanks for the people for giving me the seats. They quite considerate. There even gt one uncle walked over an offered us a seat.

erm.. twlight part 2..

2009-12-13T12:16:00.002+08:00

Erm.. Recently, i went to watch twlight part 2. Erm.. Seems like this movie was my cup of tea. Opps, i tot i like to watch romance movie? I guess only cartoon, horror and action pact movie suits me. That nite, i watched till i fall asleep for a while. Guess it is because, i was not feeling well too. That night, i went out with my good friends to celebrate their birthday. I went to my friend's gf house for dinner and played with their doggies.. :P kekee.. It had been ages that i ever touched with dogs. Haha.. Last time, i worked in a petshop wor. kekekekee.. =D

That movie let me think back of the past that i had.. Hahaha, i haven let go of the past? Erm, no lah.. I had let go of it. Just i hate myself that i am being so indecisive. Min arh Min, so long le, u still haven grown up.

Hahaha.. Guess, i very steady that nite wor, i was having gastric upset yet i still can tahan till 5 plus then reached home.. Hahaha.. Brother asked me to go home and rest.. Yet in the end, i choose to stay out for the movie. Hahaha.. I puked out all my dinner.. =x OMG!!! Erm.. i never drink at all lor.. haiz.. Ended up Sunday, i was on high fever.. Hahaha.. Monday, bo bian go work.. LL hor..

Erm.. Sad arh... My work recently not that good.. Sian.. Maybe i lost favour le.. hahaa.. guess my boss dislike me to the core.. haiz.. sian.. hopefully i can work well in the other project now.. and get a better grade.. hahaa.. maybe i am a bit greedy, i wished to get a 2 and promote next year.. Hahaha.. guess no chance le.. should be the girl who is coming back from aus have a chance to promote ba.. sad hor... study until now i still haven graduate.. work hard liming!!!! die die also must pass this time round..

As for love life, i am still single.. hahahaa.. teach me leh.. how to find the correct one.. =x

Hahaha.. Time for me to give up!!!!

2009-11-29T23:55:00.002+08:00

I bought my tickets for next year April. Time to said byebye to you. Wahaha... =D 我决定忘了你。

Heartbroken

2009-11-23T00:19:00.002+08:00

Haha... It been so long ago, I dunno why my heart still so pain... Haha... I tot
I can let it go but it doesn't seems to be easy... When I make it my
mind, I still wants u as friend... Bcos u understand me the most.. Haha... Damn... Why I am so stupid? Always lose
it then regret it... Jus like my exams... Time to learn hw to cherish it... And choose
carefully...

But hor.. He very shit.. I gt so scary ma? Why my block
me? Instead of still keep me as a contact yet we can't talk at all...

A nite to remember?

2009-11-03T02:22:00.002+08:00

Hahaha.. Last Sat, i went to St James with my friends. I remembered what happened that day vividly.

Lunch, i had New York New York heavy lunch. Then at nite, i went to meet up with my friend to take a bag from her. Then ard evening time, i met up with friends to watch movie. Jennifer's Body wasn't that fantastic show as i tot. Haha.. You know when i am watching the movie. My mind actually wondering ard. Hahaha.. Maybe recently i been really moody? I also don't know what happen to me..

For entertaining me, my friends actually accompanied to St James to meet my gd friend there. Hahaha.. Luckily, i didn't said anything wrong out that day.. Maybe abt my friend's relationship that part.. i shouldn't said out.. =x erm.. u know at the moment, i am happy.. Hahaha.. not bcos i said out my friend's relationship.. Is that i know someone do place a seat in my heart. Hahaha.. I know is impossible.. Min arh Min, pls pull yourself out. You two can fool ard when he is single.. When he is attached, pls.. u know he will be attach sooner or later.. u will still feel that kind of feeling.. pull yrself out, pls.. i dun want to see myself drag for another few more years..

keeke.. yes.. i will listen to u once to go on diet.. haha.. although u never said wat u want me to listen to u.. hahaa.. but seems like everyone is challenging abt my determination.. i dunno whether i will success or not.. but i willing to try.. to save money and to bcome prettier..

i know both of us will not be together.. we will be gd pals.. but i believe the next coming year, we will have gaps in between us... we will slowly drift apart.. u will start to find yr happiness.. of cos u also wish that i can find someone who be there for me..

u know when i am waiting for first train.. a lot of memories are flown on mind.. haha.. I was telling myself.. i can fall in love with anyone except u..

cos i dun want to lose u.. =x

2009-11-01T05:57:00.002+08:00

如果我爱上我的好朋友，又如何？我对他有那么一点好感，可是我好害怕我们两个人没有结果。我们绍跟本没有结果，为何我对他还有那种感觉

min 这次又失败了。。

2009-10-20T00:43:00.002+08:00

haiz~~ 这次的考试可能又不能成功。。开始怀疑自己不能multi-tasking.. 我又多一次让父母伤心了。。haiz~~

两个男人。。

2009-10-18T18:50:00.003+08:00

wahahaa.. the title seems like very weird hor... hahahaa.. 7 years ago... i am considered very happy xiao nu ren ba~~ cos ard me.. i gt 两个男人.. no matter whether i am happy or sad.. they will be there for me... haha.. but gradually i fall in love with one of them... and i lost him.. hahaa.. while the other one.. we no longer that close.. maybe as time passes.. things changed... slowly i learnt to be more independent.. knows that thing will not be with u forever.. must cherish them.. cos maybe next yr.. things will be different again.. u will lead yr life.. while if i keep looking backwards.. i will not be able to move forward.. maybe u already at the ending point... hahahaa.. Just like 7 yrs ago.. i am running together with you... 3 yrs later.. u left me and run faster or took a different path to reach the destination.. if i still carry on to stop at 4 yrs ago.. i will not be able to reach the destination.. and everyone behind me will jus overtake me.. hahaa.. blur blur le for so long.. finally wake up and carry on to run the marathon.. maybe we will nt met again on the journey to destination.. as long as anyone of us don't look backwards, i believe we will be happier... =)

8 years le...

2009-10-14T00:39:00.000+08:00

不知不觉8年就这样的过去了。。哈哈。。如果真的在一起的话，我们会不会在一起。。还是我们还是会分开。。还是我们还是会是好朋友。。你还过的好吗？我现在过的还好，现在这分工作没有我以前的工作来的辛苦。。没有那么难挨的日子。。还是我也跟随时间的脚步，慢慢学的放开，不要那么冲动。。哈哈。。我猜你身边有了你深爱的老婆了吧！哈哈。。。还是可能已经是爸爸了。。哈哈。。事情都过了那么旧，为何我还会偶尔想起你。。这不是应为我放不下你。只是你跟korkor给我的影响太过深，在我最彷徨无助的时候，你们会在ah min身边给她依靠。。这份人情会陪我到老。。。谢谢你。。你真的帮了我很多。。有些时候，你就是那么傻。。在我最穷的时候，是你伸出你的手帮助我。。你从来都没有向我讨回。。。只会在我身边唠叨的叫我不要那么会花钱。。还是学生的我却喜欢跟朋友吃好的。。有一次买了一杯泰国的chendol,$3.80。。。给你说了一正晚。。八年后，吃也没有了~~朋友也没有了~~ 哈哈。。。在你通电话时，我会说korkor..失去你后，korkor总会提起你。。哈哈。。真得很好笑。。

min in love le~~

2009-10-11T04:26:00.001+08:00

wahahaaa... Surprising hor~~ i will put this title.. haha.. ya~~ i am in love...

hahaa.. hw true is that.. no lah~~ is not true at all.. maybe i am just too close with him...

hahahaa.. too close to be together.. time to give up~~ arbo i will be down again for another 7 years.. by then i will be lao ah ma liao~~ where gt chance to meet my prince charming~~ now hor~~ must look carefully~~~ hahaa.. "the one" most likely will be my the other half liao~~ hahahaaa.. slowly find and enjoy my singlehood now~~ lol.. :P

Wahaha.. Min turning 25 soon!!!

2009-10-06T01:08:00.002+08:00

Haha... Min this nickname comes from a big korkor.. Haha.. Ever since that day, this nick had followed me till now.. Wahahaa.. =p

Min 傻傻等的是你对我唱生日歌.. haha.. 可是你没次都不给我一点面子。。你从来都没有记得这一天，应为你从来都没有在乎过我.. hahahaa.. do u know that every yr, tat day.. i am waiting for u to sing me a birthday song.. but hor~~ u purposely.. skipped that day... hahaa.. silly hor.. haha... 7 years ago.. u won't sing me a birthday song.. wat makes u think 7 yrs later u will sing for me... so fast hor~~ time passes so long le.. haha.. we all had our own lives.. hahaa.. big korkor.. no matter where u are now.. hopes that u are doing fine.. having a great life.. hahaa..

if one day, i met this da korkor on the streets.. i doubt that he can still recognize me nor i can recognize him.. hahaaa..

i wondering hw my birthday will be like this year? last year.. da jie they all keep me accompany.. then i went st james with my friends... hahaa.. my brother also pass me a phone.. cos my phone spolit le.. then followed by a bbq...

guess this year.. will be much more quiet ba... i dun have much friends.. whaahahaaa..

It had been so long ago

2009-09-26T17:13:00.005+08:00

haha... It had been so long ago that i ever post here... Nt that recently i am extremely busy or wat had happened recently... After so many years, i had finally let go of the feelings i had for me.... Heeh.... I m so happy.... feel so gd to let go... But i still wish to have him as a friend... Cos he is my closest friend... 我们做不成情人也可以做朋友。

Haha. today i had a very bad backache... But i still insisted of going out with mum... This bad backache reminds me of nanny.. Haha... I always think he very naggy... Lol... :p i think i more naggy... Everything also wan to control... Hehe.. Last time when i bad backache... He is the one who accompany me see doctor... Haha.... While the other one only accompany me chat on phone.. haha.... Time flies... Each of us had our lives.. No point looking backward again... Just all these are very sweet memory..

我是一个很好骗的女人.. Haha...

Haha... My life nw involves work n study... As for relationship, is still empty... Asking whether wants to find one to occupate tat seat.. Haha... I wish but really depend on fate. crush... I gt leh... Lol.... At tat point of time, i really fall in love with him.. But looking back of my experience, i decide to move step backward... Just in case, we can't even b friends... Plus the type of gal he looking for confirm is nt me... Haha... Recently, i gt a lot of match make leh... Office one.. He is neighbour.. my gd friend said my brother.. Haha... My brother asked me go on diet... Haha... He scare 我嫁不出去...

Recently.. i am happy...

2009-08-14T01:15:00.000+08:00

hahahaaa... recently... i had been quite happy.. hahahaa.. hw come arh~~ lol.. =p although seems like school stuffs still makes me quite sick... hahahaaa...

I am puzzled... i had been doing my part for tutorial.. i did one more extra questions... hahaa.. but seems like nobody willing to send me the latest copy of assignment which is link to exams~~ sad hor~~ maybe wo ren yuan bu hao~~ imagine~~ my friend 12 midnight then tell me.. can i help to do one part of the question.. hahaha..at first, i was very unwillingly.. cos i had been offering help each time.. but doesn't seems like other pple is helping me... haha.. in the end.. i still do it.. then now.. asking her to send me a file.. is like so hard... sian~~

haahahaa... recently been at work... erm.. i got a feeling.. my small boss had a this kind of feeling of dislike me.. erm.. or maybe i think too much.. or bcos i took over some stuffs that actually that belongs to him. If u asked me, what had happened? Seriously, i don't know what is happening. But no instructions from my big boss that i can return the stuffs back to my small boss even he is back. What should i do? In order not to offend my big boss, i am hugging the task. But doesn't seems to be my performance for that particular is good. Hahaha.. Next year performance bonus must be gone case. Erm.. Or maybe i should said, i don't even know whether next year, will i still be here or not? Currently, i still quite like my job, of cos there are down times also. But i really learn a lot of stuffs here. And i am trying to be sociable plus independent.. Trying to ignore all office politics.. wahahaa.. :P

opps.. one more thing..... singapore is really very small.... Mr I dunno's cousin became my colleague, furthermore he is in the same team as me. Wahahaa..... Small hor~~ I quit one and half years ago, yet now we are meeting in another place, furthermore under the same boss.

hahaahaa.... if i said i have a crush.. do u believe... hahaaha.. i am on leave today yet this person had been floating in my mind.. wahaha... does it means that i had a crush on him.. i sooooo0oo0o0o0o0o0ooooo long never had this kind of feelings... i am s00o00o0o0oo0oo0oo0oo0o0ooo00o happy.... alternatively, it means i am willing to let go of the past and start a brand new life.. lol... =p

wahahaa.. my gd friend.. she is giving birth in oct~~ hahaa.. a lot of things i dunno.. mainly is my childhood friend who told me these... hahaha... actually i think i am a failure friend.. no wonder.. i dun have true friends ard me...

times passes really fast.. last time me and my childhood friend dislike each other ba... hahahaa.. yet now we are close friends.. hahahaa... and he is going for exchange for four months.. i should get him a birthday gift before he leave hor~~ not when he comes back then i give him the birthday gift, right.. maybe by then, i am already broke...

recently not running frm anyone... sometimes.. really feel lazy to entertain pple.. sometimes.. is really too tired.. just wants to rest.. cos sometimes i do assignments.. until late nites... while the next day.. i still need to work.. just wants to rest... i am sorry.. if i haven been meeting/catching up with u.

hahahaaha.. breakdown?

2009-07-18T01:48:00.003+08:00

hahahaa.. recently been squeeze by work.. but studies also went really haywire..hahaa.. my grp not very united.. hahaa.. bcos of a book.. i also quarrelled with my friend.. hahahaa.. wah lah~~ i never attend first lecture for half an hour~~ hw i know need to buy book~~ =_____= she still keep saying.. u dunno meh~ he keeps mentioning~~ wah lau~~ wth.. i skipped half an hour~~ hw i know wat is happening? my fault meh!!! hahahaa. everytime not my fault~ also my fault~~ hahaaa.. sibei sian~~`

hahahaa.. just now on the way back hm~~ mummy said a topic~~ suddenly i feel a sharp pain in my heart~~ hahahaa.. guess tat topic is abt my wound.. opps.. i tot i had recoved frm that wound already.. hw come i still feel painful.. hahahaa.. am i really that stubborn...

hahahaa.. i tot i still told my friend i like someone.. hahaa.. he so cool.. sometimes so sweet.. hahaa.. but towards everyone he is also like that.. hahahaa.. see him.. makes me happier.. hhahahaa.. i think i need to brush up my communication skills.. but too bad~~ i too childish~~ hahaa.. min ah min~~ good guys are all attached le~~ wahahaa..

next month~~ i might be going chalet.. tmd~~ again go there be lightbulb ba~~ haiz~~ sian~~ guess i bring my ds lite go there play game~~ or dun stayed there overnite~~ hahaa.. i dun mind.. to get drunk if i can forget the past~~ especially the part tat hurt mt so badly.. hahaha.. really got so jialat mah~~ or i haven met the correct one~~ hahahaa...

surprisingly~ i had a dinner with my cousin~~ had some chat~~hopefully can slowly build our relationship ba~~

人情

2009-07-12T11:21:00.002+08:00

hahhaaha... shifu~~ recently tot me some stuffs.. hahaaa.. i am trying to improve on it~~ based on her comments.. heheheee... see lah~~ her comments weight a lot to me~~ although she is not my reporting officer.

hahahaahaaaaa.. maybe is 我欠他的人情，所以我一直忘不了他。

不知不觉

2009-06-19T01:09:00.003+08:00

哈哈！不知不觉，我已经在我现在的公司做了一年多..

hahahaa.. . Realise that if i am type that in chinese, i will not be able to type finish this post in about 15 mins time. Wahahaaa.. :P

Last week, i did my performance review report. Hahhahaaa.. Guess what i get? Seriously i was hoping for a better grade, but it ended up having disappointment. Hahaha.. Recently, i been very close with my shifu. Sometimes i will just disturb her whenever i am in office. Heheheee.. Of cos she is like my da jiejie like that.. Hahaha.. She actually taught me a lot of stuffs but too bad last time in my ex-company, she only guide me a while. Of cos i am in deep trouble, she was the one who help me to tell others that. That is when my help came over to save me from that pile of shit. Instead of being pressure by a lot of people, i started to get attention from others that without help, i will die there. HAhahaa.. Pressure from users, bosses and dateline. Is a DAMN shitty job. But not to mention, maybe without encouragement from everyone, i doubt i can survive.. :P Hahahaa.. Shifu told me that my grade not too bad le, cos i am only being review for half a year. When i signed my letter, the lady already told me that everything will starts from when i signed that letter.

What my big boss told me was that i got what i had was because based on what i had contributed before i was being converted as well. Hahaha.. I saw my director comment. She said i need to build up my confident and i can try out others position. Does it means that if i show improvement, i will be promote one level up? Hahahaahaa.. Guess i must be dreaming right. Furthermore, my boss said that i dunno how to articulate things that i want to said. That is true. Seriously, i am not a person who are good at words. Normally i will just provoke people ba. Hahahaa.. Tat's why i dun have a lot of friends?

Hahahaa.. Last tuesday, i was very pissed off that my big boss only praise my colleague for the work that she put in to get things done. Hahahaa.. Then i went over to server room to hide.. wahahaa.. Opps.. Sounds like i am showing attitude, but of cos i got stuffs to do, that's why i go over, just that i go over earilier.. =p

Opps.. This coming Sat, my gd friend going aus for a month le~~ opps.. Without her.. can i still survive.. Normally i will sms her to complain/grumble~~ but hor~~ nvm~~ still got two persons.. Although both of them are attached, they will be there for me de hor~~ ahahaa

Last wk, i saw korkor's blog.. Erm.. Seriously, he had been very different since i know him when i am sec 1. Hahahaa.. Time Files~~ We used to be very closed but of cos now we are still good friends. Hahaha.. Korkor scold me before. When i need him, i will wish that he be there for me. When he needs me, he also cannot find me. Guess i am a selfish freak~~ Seriously, korkor.. You had been there for me whenever i am really down. Without you, that time i had already collaspe, would not move to be what i am now. I still remember, there is one night.. HAhaahaa.. Some stuffs happened.. I said i dun want to be friends with you. You call me immediately asked me what had happened.. Hahaha.. Tat day, u hear me cried like siao~~ hahahaa.. Before you go back, u handed me a packet of sweets telling me work hard for your o level, ok.. dun think too much..Hahahaaa.. What happened that day arh.. that makes me cry like mad.. Hahahaa.. Of cos is bcos of adults~~~ hahaahaa...

hahahaa.. Very Ridiculously hor~~ is when Korkor burst my voicemail, is when i met him. Wahahaha... These two nan ren arh~~ haiz~~ one of them i had lose him le~~ i should try to keep the other one hor~~ arbo, lose both of them.. How...

hahaahaa.. seriously i think i very thick-skinned leh~~ Min arh min.. He never loves you before.. When you had such a strong feelings with him, even now you still hopes to have him as a friend.. Yet pple is still so scare of you.. Hahaa.. Min, i thinks you are just being silly. When you had feelings with someone who don't loves you at all. Hahaahaa.. I also dunno why leh~~ is had bcome of habit or ? Haahahaa.. Erm, seriously now hor~~ i just wants to be friend with you. I just dun want to lose a good friend. I know both of us will not be together but i really wish to be friends with you. Bcos i feel that u are the person that i get opened up to talk with. Hahaaha.. You know lah.. Min dun have a lot of friends.. I just wants a few friends that are close can le~~ Hopes we still have a chance to be friends..

Oppss.. Min arh Min.. You are really damn thick-skinned leh~~ hahaahaa.. Is ok lah.. He will never know all these.. To him, i am just a passby person.. HAhaaa.. I scold you before~~ is my fault~~ Maybe.. Opps.. Should not said maybe.. Should said is i am the one being rude, tat's why i had lose this friendship~~ Hahaaa.. When we had our cold war, i never feel that pain.. Hahahaa.. Just like what jil said.. When u are away for one month, i cried one month.. HAahaa.. How come i dunno that u are so impt to me.. WHen i totally lose you, i feel so pain~~ You know why.. Let me tell you ba~~

HAahaahaa..

Korkor pull me out from O level. You had also heard me cried when i quarrel with him when i just met you. Hahaa.. You told me.. Dun cry le~~ everything will be ok de.. Hahaah... You two hor are the most important persons in my life leh~~ hahahaa.. Everytime helped me yet dun let me do something for both of you to express my gratitude.. Hahaahaa.. But as time goes, i had bcome closer with you than korkor.. Hahaha, i also dunno when i had fallen for you.. Wahahahaa.. The only time when my hp bill burst is becos of u lah... Hahaha.. I miss those simple days.. Maybe just like what brother told me.. You hor~~ belong to stupid woman where guys won't like de.. HAhahaaa.. =p

I scold you before yet i wish to be friend with you.. Very confusing right.. Hahahaa.. Maybe i am just trying to make myself feel better.. HAahhaa.. I dunno leh is because i dunno the reason why we were being apart for so far or ?

HAhaahaa.. 我讨厌你们lah.. 每一次，让我想起你们曾经为我这个傻瓜的事，我都会哭了。。我真的很想念那段日子。。可是一切都过去了。。我还有korkor在。。 =)

HAhaahaa... Tell u all a truth ba~~ Hahahaaa.. I told jil before that i had forgotten about you. Hahahaa.. Maybe i am lying to myself ba~~ bcos you had a placed inside me le~~ hahahaa.. I know why i lose you.. Bcos i am just a wildful person.. A person who is extremely selfish.. Who scares to lose.. Who throws temper on you.. Who scold you when i dun need you.. who dun wants to change.. who is extremely selfish~ 6 years ago, i told u i want to go diet.. diet until dunno where le~~ even my the other gd friend slim down le~~ yet i did nothing.. Just like wat da jie said, i dun have any reputation.. What i said are always lies~~ Such a failure.... 我哪里配得起你这个朋友。。你是一个笨笨的朋友。。朋友有事，你一定会帮他。我知道那时你帮我是你相信我。可是你不知道应为这样，我也慢慢的爱上你了。我从小到大，我知道我是一支丑小鸭。我也没想过会有一个人会对我那么好。。也应为这样，我在那里时，我好想您。哈哈。。笨笨的。。我以为丑小鸭终于有人要了，没想到适应为你对每个人都一样好。我就那么笨的以为你就是我的真名天子了。。哈哈。。从失去你到现在，我以定要find一个比你好的男人。这样才对的起我自己吗。。 =)

a old friend came over...

2009-06-08T00:41:00.002+08:00

hahahaaa..ever since after my poly days... my old friend so long never find me~~
hahahaa.. recently.. it came back~~ hahahaa.. omg~~

dunno leh..recently work been very tie up with me~~ everyday kana squeeze the brain juice~~ i am tired~~ but i am still happy.. hahaha.. being contented with life? hahaha.. no lah...

erm~~ seriously.. recently, my feelings went haywire again~~ hahahaa.. i saw a guy who looks like him~~ hahaha.. but i know is not him~~ wahahaa.. stupid right.. just had a very weird feelings towards this guy.. dunno why.. is it bcos he looks like him~~ hahahaa..

recently.. i got a feeling of stepping into a relationship~~ but hor~~ nobody wants.. wahahahaaa.. wo tui ran xiang jia~~ mayb that's why nowadays pple called me ah siao~~~ :P

hahaaaa.. recently been really guai~~ never touch alcholic drinks at all wor.. ahhahaaa....

sad week..

2009-05-25T16:46:00.002+08:00

hahahaahaa.. sad week for me last week.. hahahaa... why.. .

erm.. exams flunk~~ hahaha.. surprising hor~~ hahahaahaa.. so sad..
but wat can i do... fail le already fail le.. there is nothing i can do.. now is time to work harder and make sure i pass it with flying colours..

jia you jia you~~ min u are no longer that weak right.. :x

being dumb~~

2009-05-13T00:03:00.001+08:00

hahahaa.. being dumb~ i dunno hw to differentiate wat is love and wat is friendship~~~ hahahaaaa.. but i am happy to be with him~~ hahahaa.. but of cos to maintain as per our current situation~~ hahaaaa.. as friends.. lol..... :P i miss the memories i had with him over there.. lol... :P dunno why leh~~~ but we fated not to be together.

haahahaa.. so overall.. i am still single... wahahahaa.. :P

2009-05-01T13:00:00.001+08:00

歌曲：明天以后
歌手：林峰&泳儿专辑：your love

林峰泳儿-明天以后(国)
曲词:伍仲衡冯颖琪
改编词:姜忆萱

泳:在你的记忆里面有一个我
在你最痛苦的时候陪你度过
难过过了天晴朗了我就走

林:你拯救我的寂寞我的痛我的梦
在你的面前我不必保留
还来不及对你说
迟到的我的心动

泳:你的好你的坏
林:我的脾气你最懂
泳:我不要你心疼我(林:我不要你离开我)
合:明天的以后我们会懂
失恋的挫折让人变更成熟

泳:我对你感觉胜过爱情
林:因为有你给我勇气给我用不完的运气
林:其实也想好好爱你
泳:只怕到最后不小心让你伤心(林:我不怕会伤心)
合:对不起我对你再好再亲密都不能在一起
林:最后看你在别人怀里
泳:有天我会找到我的唯一(林:我并不是你的唯一)
合:还微笑祝福你

林:你拯救我的寂寞我的痛我的梦
在你的面前我不必保留
泳:我从来没对你说
压抑的我的心动

林:我的好我的坏我的脾气你最懂
泳:我不要你来心疼我
合:明天的以后我们会懂
失恋的挫折让人变更成熟

泳:我对你感觉胜过爱情
林:因为有你给我勇气给我用不完的运气
林:其实也想好好爱你
泳:只怕到最后不小心让你伤心(林:我不怕会伤心)
合:对不起我对你再好再亲密都不能在一起
林:最后看你在别人怀里
泳:有天我会找到我的唯一(林:我并不是你的唯一)
合:还微笑祝福你

泳:爱情总让人折磨
林:所以我们才选择
合:做比情人更好的朋友

泳:我对你感觉胜过爱情
林:因为有你给我勇气给我用不完的运气
林:其实也想好好爱你
泳:只怕到最后不小心让你伤心(林:我不怕会伤心)
合:对不起我对你再好再亲密都不能在一起
林:最后看你在别人怀里
泳:有天我会找到我的唯一(林:我并不是你的唯一)
合:还微笑祝福你

I just simply fall in love with this song once my friend share it with me.. Why? hahahaa.. guess jil will know why.. wahahahaa.. :P

IRAS

2009-04-27T09:07:00.002+08:00

hahahaa..

damn disappointed with the service tat they provided me.. hahaa.. is i understand the system works too well or is it bcos i am pissed off with the sum of amount that is being deducted. Hahahaa.. to be frank, i am just pissed off with the system on how it works. If you are telling me that, i had received a letter that the debts will be deducted through CPF. I will not be so pissed off. Hahaa.. What to do.. That's the way how government do things. Today morning i called in and talk to the officer. Haahaa.. She insisted that i had received the letter. The problem is hor~ Maybe she is too dumb or she pretended to be dumb, which a lot of people choose this method. Hahahaa.. :P If i had received the letter ages ago, why didn't i call in to ask about this matter or to clarify this method. Instead of now then i called in to ask about this matter. Haiz~~ I am utterly disappointed with the services that iras provides me. Are you trying to tell me there is a flaw in your system or CPF system or Sing Post, which lead us that we never received the letters from you? If you had tried to recovering the debts since 2006, why aren't we received any letters from any agencies regarding this matter? As stated inside IRAS website, the letter will only be send out to one owner even though the property is own by multiple owners. But the lady officer who i talk to said that we should received a remainder letter. Confusing right? Isn't there is a conflict between what you had said and with what you had indicated in your website?

First, i would like to said that this lady who i spoke to. Thinks that she is always right. How do i know that? I know you are sad that this sum of money is deducting from your dad's account. This is assumption, which is wrong. As a customer service officer, how can you make assumption? If what you said is correct, why i didn't i called in to iras since 2006, instead of wait until 2009? You said during these 3 years, IRAS had took multiple actions to recover the debts. But, it doesn't seems to work. It seems like IRAS is not reciprocate enough to recover the debts. Is only when CPF informed them, then they took the action to recover the sum money. CPF money is help Taxpayer or Singaporeans like us to tide through their retirement. Now it seems like CPF money is to repay other government agency, instead of for retirement.

For example, a poor guy worked for 55 years old. He only allowed to withdraw around 6k from his CPF account. Ended up, IRAS took 4.9k from him. Therefore he only left ard 1.1k. Is this enough for his retirement? Not at all. What about those people with bank account who are much more richer than him? The poor guy dun even had a bank account lor~~ hahaa... this poor guy destiny to be poor. Even government also dun let him off to have a little savings for his rainy days as he is getting older each year.

I am so disappointed rather than sad. So the customer officer, don't assume it when you don't know it. Don't act smart when you are not.

dilemma

2009-04-25T02:41:00.001+08:00

haiz~~ recently met a dilemma problem.. haiz~~ this is a tackle problem.. which i dun even know how to solve.. haiz~~ quite useless hor~~ so old liao~ yet still cannot handle this kind of problem.. haiz~~ sian!!! is worst than my work.. hahaahaaa..

Tendering?

2009-04-24T01:32:00.002+08:00

hahahaa.. Surprisingly... After one year plus hor~~ i had this kind of thinking..

Demoralize

2009-04-21T12:37:00.002+08:00

haiz~~~ sian~~ ytd just had my exams, what the hell.. This paper is damn screw up, i think i am gone for this paper... haiz~~ before my exams, i had a premonition that all my friends passed for this module and i am the only failure. haiz~~ guess this going to happen.. haiz~~ this paper is indeed a screw up for me sia~~ haiz~~ i always tot my maths is good.. BUT WAT THE HELL.. such a disappointment..i dunno how to do linear graph~~~ KILL ME BA~~ haiz~~ sian~~ had to face the facts.. 1.6k flyaway.. now still need to face the facts, i am going to fail.. haiz~~ sian~~ next time nobody accompany me to study le~~ haiz~~ so sian~~

min arh min.. U ARE SUCH A DISGRACE SIA!!!!

Career?

2009-04-18T00:27:00.003+08:00

Hahahaaaa.. After i had changed company for 1 years plus, i attended a company event today. Pretty Surprise? I feel home over here. Hahaa.. :P But i need to brush up my communication skills and confidence plus my connection.

Erm, any regrets of joining yr current company? or thinking to change of career path or thinking of looking for a new job opportunities. Hahaa... At the moment, i guess nope. I am contented with what i had now. Sometimes dun be greedy; when you asked for more, for me: i will always fall down and hurt myself. Wahahahaa.... Seems like very pessmistic. Life is like a roller coaster, there is always ups and down, otherwise u will NEVER learn to cherish or to be contented with what you had in life.

Of cos, in every job, there is politics, depends on whether is it obvious or not obvious. But i guess i choose to ignore it. As for currently, i just hopes to finish my studies co-currently doing at a moderate standard of my work. But of cos, is not easy to handle, especially based on my mischievous character. Sometimes work too hard, i would like to go for a break. But the leave that i took every month, is making damn pai sei.. I will try to compensate whenever i am not schooling. Maybe my boss do not knows that sometimes i tend to work late to get my things completed. Just like when you reach office early, everybody will knows. When you are last person to left the office, nobody will knows. But i think my immediate supervisor knows that, sometimes i will work until very late. There are times he told me, "Don't always work until so late." Erm, as for pple who knows me when i am working at my previous company. I had a sulken face each time i come out with my brothers, and each time, i will drag them to sit down to chat and complain as much as i can. But now i cut down on my complain. Haahahaa.. Sometimes when you been through the rainy days, you will learn to grow a bit. Each time a rainy day come, is a challenge. Once you overcome the challenge, you will become stronger each time. I am still trying to learn to be stronger and independent. I know this path is hard but i believe my hao jie mei and my brothers will be at my side when i need them? hahaahaa.. :P

A Dream~~

2009-04-12T03:03:00.002+08:00

Wahahahaa.. Korkor confirm will said me de.. u know hor~~ i dreamt of him calling me.. and in the end, i went to buy 4d.. TMD!!!!!! this 4 digits came out 1st price but i never strike~~ -_-''''' haiz~~~ cos the position incorrect.. haiz~~ no luck~~ is it bcos it will never happen to us.. he will nt call me.. whaahaha.. am i still missing him~~ or he had a placed in my heart.. maybe is used to have ba~~ now is no longer le~~

Let me dream of someone else better.. hahaa.. :P rather than "him"...

Erm.. one of my buddies having operation on monday~~ is a small operation.. everything will be fine~~ hopefully his feelings will be the same also ba~~

last wk, my colleague just had an operation.. now in the progress of recovering.. hehee.. she very sweet de.. sometimes she will make sushi and treat us eat.. but hor~~ she gt a lot of funny ideas~~ next time gt chance, take the photo of my plushies in office...

hahahaa.. of cos, exam is coming le~~ hopefully, i won't screw up this time~~ things will be better..

supposely, this weekend, i should be at KL!!!! my friend actually wanted to sponsor me air-tickets cum accomdation~~ hahaa..but hor~~ dunno.. just dun have the "trust" but hor~~ i should have trust her~~ erm.. actually maybe is nt abt trust ba~~ guess is bcos of my mum's hand~~ haiz~~ her hand getting worst~~~ maybe down the road, still haven recover~~ i will bring her to genting first~~ then persuade her to go for operation~~ cos... she can't hardly open her hand.. she can't take heavy stuffs~~ the doctor said is bcos of nerve.. is either go for operation or injection.. haiz~~ i actually also dun really know wat is happening~~ cos recently been busy with studies.. hadn't really spend time together with her and bring her to see doctor~~ haiz~~

My Good Friend...

2009-04-06T01:27:00.002+08:00

hahaha.. I am happy for my good friend.. but luckily she never tell me on April Fool, otherwise i might take it as a joke. Hehee.. :P

Although i dun have siblings, dun have the joy to countdown to my baby niece or nephew.. But hor.. i will countdown to my gd friend's baby.. hahaha.. very dramatically, last time we are not so close.. ever since when we bcome so close arh.. hahaaha.. i also dunno leh.. :P

hahaa.. pple ard me are happily in relationship.. suddenly, i feel so lonely sia~~ hahaa.. maybe work and study can help me to wash away this feeling ba~~ maybe i really fated to be nun.. cos even now i am in a relationship hor~~ i also dunno hw to handle it.. most imptly.. my the other half must accept my brothers.. hahaa... they are my closest pals, include my this going to be mother.. :P

last weekend.. although i chionging my assignments, i still met up with my brothers they all.. heheee.. just a relaxing weekend with them... we had ichiban sushi and after that we went down to minds cafe~~ hahaa.. this is the first time, i been there wor~~ heheee.. :P not bad~~ quite fun.. :P

i didn't know there is an escalator near the museum there.. surprising right.. haahahaaa.. :P i realise that a lot of couples like to go museum to pa toh.. why arh? hahaa.. i am not there to pa toh..just happen to pass by there.....

hahaha.. the past~~

2009-03-15T03:39:00.002+08:00

wow.. indeed, i took a long way to walk out the maze. Amazingly, i manage to get my way out. Wishing him with all the happiness and happily ever after with his the other half. I guess now he should be married le ba~~ whaahaa.. i am still in love with this married guy? hahaha.. no lah.. just a memories~~ i read thru my old blog~~ hahahahaaa... i didn't know that i wrote so many parts that i will break down when me and him are aparted.. hahaha... i really break down le~~ and this breakdown took me more than 3 years to recover back~~ hahaha.. so short only~~ i still tot is very long ago~~~ hahaha... time passes so fast~~~ omg~~

What if i said.. now i am in love with my gd friend.. hahahaa... to protect myself from getting hurt.. i decided to step out... No ending de~~ i dun want to have something that happened again.. u know hor~~ is very painful lor~ tat cut is damn bad~~ tmd... wrote so many post that i must fade away the crush.. hw can standby someone for so long yet no status.. STUPID arh~~ hopefully, now i am better..

hahahaa... now everyone treats me like an ah siao~~ i prefer to stay on as ah siao~~ i think is happier... hahaha.. life is so short... wat if one day, i land in hospital~~ hahaahaa.. or if one day, i walked off from this world.. will anyone miss me~~ haha.. i hopes i will go off later than my grandma... i dun want her to cry for me~~ hahhaa.. is it bcome my time is up~~ tat's why i am so happy... hahaha.. so energetic in things that i do.. or i am happy from the bottom of my heart~~ hahahahah... sounds so sad here sia~~ haahaha.. i haven go for medical checkup yet.. haha.. based on woman's instinct.. i can sense some parts of my body or health had gone haywire le~~ hahahaa.. or i think too much~~ tat's why i started my diet~~ hopefully this will makes me lead a healthier life~~

dear friends.. i am ok~~ jus think tat my cholestral is damn high~~ guess is the frequent of seafood and meat.. frm a kid.. i had nvr like vegetables~ now trying to love to eat salad.. and sashimi~~ whaahahaa...sashimi should not be fat right.. hahaha.. Time to do exercise~~ :P

but most likely, this yr or next yr, i will be going for operation.. should i pick an auspicious date.. hahaha... definitely is not bcos after watching perfect and perfect 2, i am thinking of getting myself plastic surgery to do liposuction.. hahaha.. is time for me to pluck my wisdom tooth.. so sad sia~~ i no wisdom.. nw going to pluck away my wisdom tooh.. guess is going to be worst~~ i think my iq is less than 50 sia~~

time to sleep le~~ nite nite.. :)

1 year... Time files~~~

2009-03-06T01:48:00.002+08:00

Hahaha.. So fast, i am with my current company for one year already. Wahahaa.. From a subContract to perm. So called waited for so many years, after i graduate, i finally get myself a perm job. Omg~~~ I had waited for 2 years plus..

This year, of cos, i hopes that my diet will have effect.. Instead of growing horizontally.... i would wish it to be reducing from horizontally.. haha.. When pple gets old, u will start to feel emptiness? haha.. but at the moment, i won't feel in this way.. Every week, i had to study 4 days, time passes very fast for me. Hopefully, one year later, i will said i had graduate and get myself a degree. Hehehee... :P Hopefully, my parents will feel glad. From young till now, they dun give me any burden nor any stress. Unlike other kids, i dun have the stress or pressure from parents regarding studies. They dun decide which path should i take nor which way should i take. They let me decide my own path.

Seriously, from a rebellious kid when i am young till now. I doubt i got a lot of changes? Haha.. In life, of cos there will be ups and down. I used to take it very seriously but it doesn't seems to be the correct approach. But i admit is my fault. In a friendship, it is not a must that the other party need to be reciprocal in the same way. There was a time tat i can't differentiate friendship and relationship well. Hopefully in the future, i can see it clearly. Hahaaaa.. As for my love life hor, is still empty.. hehee.. Oppss, seems that it had been emptied for quite a long period of time le~~ haha.. maybe forever? I start to love single life.. hehee.. but of cos, there are times that i will feel emptiness and hopes to have someone to care for me.. But i think nobody can replace the love from my parents.

Hahahaaa.. They are always that protective towards me, although they give me a lot of freedom. Opps, this sounds like confusing. Maybe that is the culture from my parents or maybe bcos i am the only one. Normally the "one" is always very precious. Your love will all pay towards him/her. Just like when you love someone. Tat someone bcome the "one", you will try not to hurt him/her indirectly.

Recently, i had bcome closed with my friend's gf.. OMG!!! is this correct? Hahaha.. U know.. Is hard to believe sia... I am not sociable yet i can be friends with my friend's partner. Hahaa.. WORST!!! one is my brother's gf. Erm.. Not to said being betray whoever, so i will stay at a position of "I dunno anything". Listen and forget... Sometimes, i really very scare i said the wrong thing bcos sometimes i dun my brain dun process wat i said, which means is "人头猪brain".

Situation 1 :
Your bf going to share a room with one of his female friends. Will you mind?

Hahaha.. Seriously, if i really love him. I will mind. When he is away, i will keep think of what is going to happen there. Maybe i belong to possessive type ba.. But you know woman always have this kind of feelings especially pple like me who dun have confident in myself. Haha.. I tried before to break up bcos i dun have confident in myself. haha.. or maybe so called i dunno wat is love ba or i trying to protect myself not to get hurt.. haha.. but ended up, i still got hurt.. which then, my door is closed.. :X i am waiting for the correct person who holds the key for my door... =p

Normally the guy will said, u should trust me. Both of us had been together for so long and etc............ The problem is nobody dares to make promises time cannot change anything.

Situation 2
So called "Yr gd friend" stepped into a third party relationship. Haha.. Isn't tat normal? Nowadays so many relationship being broken up bcos there is a third party. What if you know both gals? Relationship is not strong enough to encounter the blow. From an outsider view is, the earlier you let go, is better for you. You know hor.. If the relationship had already being fade away, no matter hw you fix it. It will still occurs again? Once bitten, twice shy. Or so called when both of you quarrel, you will still bring back the past (provided u are a person who keep looking backwards, just like me.. =x), then ended up each time quarrel will get worst. Ending is still break up.

Situation 3
What if your bf had a very close gal friend? Hahahaa.. Most imptly, see hw the gal looks first.. --> hahah.. this is wat my guy friend told me de.. haha.. or see hw close they are.. If they are buddies le.. then should be ok ba~~ cos yr bf sure treat that gal as guy liao.. Personal opinion.. When a guy and a girl had bcome good friends for very long, i doubt that there will be sparks. Will you want someone who know deep inside u? haha... Woman arh.. HArd to understand creatures sia~~ At one moment, you would wish to have a bf who knows u deep inside, at another moment, u desire a bf who dunno u tat well.. Haha.. Time to work smart.... When u know her too well, act that u dunno her well.. When is time to show her concern or shower her with gifts.. Then u should know her well.. Which means.. When she is down... is time to show that u understand her well.. When she is ok.. then is time to act stupid.. dun everything also said "Ok.. i know.." Ended up, no surprises.. hw to maintan a relationship?

First Day of Diet

2009-03-03T00:34:00.001+08:00

hheehee..today is my first day of diet..
if within 3 mths, i manage to get results.. i am going to get myself a gucci small pouch. :P

guess i make a right choice?

2009-02-20T23:56:00.002+08:00

hahaa.. Recently is the time for apparsial but hor~~ till now i haven do it, yet the dateline is on the coming Monday which is an important day for me. Why? It is because i will be having exams on that day. Wahahahaa.. How my company works? If your apparsial fall into average, u will get an average bonus plus 13th month for the year. Otherwise, it will be one month bonus for the whole year. Currently economy is that at the downstream, i also dun dare to dream too much. Hopefully, i will get an average grade ba~~~ Life at work had been become harder, more and more things for me to deal with. Time to learn to work smart and study hard in the meantime.

Monday, i will be having my exams, haiz~~ hopefully this time round, i won't screw up the paper again.

Hahaha.. As a switch of company in a year ago, did i make the right choice? Erm.. I guess i did, in a long term run, i believe this will be a better choice. My ex-colleague who join the same company earilier than me. He prefers to stay at the current company more than his ex-company. Erm.. Actually, i also not sure which one i prefer. Guess maybe i work for the sake for money, not for passion. Opps.. Sounds like i think no money, got passion also no use. At home, i still got two mouth to feed wor~ As times goes, i think my financial burden will be heavier. Time to wake up, gal. U no longer that pamper princess, u had grown up to be queen.. or so call slave for life. Work hard now, earn a higher pay, so you can provide your parents a much more comfortable life. Plus express your grattitude towards your aunties and uncles that helped you thru your 25 years of life.. If without them, i won't be able to enjoy life that much.. :P

thanx everyone~~~

Complex feelings~~~

2009-02-09T12:48:00.003+08:00

Hahahaa.. I met my gd friend for a drink. Two crazy women bought 2 cans of beer go sit at the beach there and talk. Hahahaa.. She asked me about how's my relationship life. Erm.. this is a question that i dun really know how to answer. Not bcos i am in relationship that i dun dare to let pple know. Is i am in such a dilemma situation which i dun even know wat i really wants deep inside me. Of cos, we did talk abt the past that i had. Hahaha.. Surprising that i can be so opened. I guess i did change a bit? I reached home around 3am in the morning ba~~ I got another surprise was she gave me a guess bag for xmas exchange.. OMG!!!! no matter how much it is, guess is the tots that count ba~~ hahaha.. u know hor~~ she sometimes really very sweet..

sat, of cos i had a very shag look to go school, especially i slept at 4 plus, while i had to wake up at 9 to go for lesson. There are times that i struggled to go to school. In the end, i still drag myself to school. After my lesson, i went to parkway there to have lunch with my ex-colleague. Erm... Out of my surprise, i met nanny!!!! OMG!!!! i think hor, i had never met up with him about 2 years? hahaha.. i had a super shag look on my face.. that i just said a hi to him while we crossing the road. But i gave him a call to apologise to him, cos i am really tired. Furthermore, i am going jurong point at nite to meet my dearest brothers... haha.. i reached home ard 2plus but hor~~ i knocked out at 3 plus and i overslept~~ luckily one of my brothers going to be late.. :P otherwise i think i dun need to go le~~ they will come over to my house to wake me up.. haha.. we talked quite a bit~~ tat day was a treat from me to them.. haha.. :P although brother wanted to pay, in the end still i pay.. haha.. u know hor~~ we talked abt all sort of rubbish.. haha.. of cos talked abt my past also.. which makes me dreamt of him on tat nite.. So stupid sia~~ i was sad when i heard he and his gf had been together for one year.. OMG!!! i already let go, how come i still got this stupid dream.. :X

Sunday, my brothers they all came over to my house. Haha.. :P one left early bcos need to pick up his gf. While another one stayed until 6pm.. :P Ard 7pm, i went out with my parents to have dinner. Erm.. I treated them for dinner at xiao dian er, since they never been there before. How can daughter enjoy her life always? of cos once in a while need to share my parents right.. :P Act filial or really filial.. it is up to individual to think, as long as i know the answer myself can already.

haha.. during cny second day, my maternal grandmother asking me a question which i dunno how to answer leh.. :X erm.. she asked me to bring my bf and let her see. I said wait until i find one then i bring him and let her see. Her reply is damn cute.. "When you bring him back, i already eat salted egg." ....... "No lah~~ won't lah~~" haha... is she trying to hint me that my expectation is too high or i nobody wants~~ hahaha.. :P i dunno leh.. let fate decides for me ba~~ Erm.. if one day she really in a crucial state, guess i will ask someone to help me to solve this problem.. lie to her and make her goes happily? Am i being cruel? I just want to make a white lie and let her go happily.. Hopefully, someone will help me to do that.. haha.. who will be that someone.. i dunno sia~~ see, by then who will be my closest friend plus provided his gf won't mind.. .

recently i think i kana ban in someone's gf list. Opps.. I better stop message him, otherwise nextime we meet up for dinner.. it doesn't going to look good? haha.. my friend said... u lah.. always msg him.. erm.. no lah.. maybe once a wk? or nt even once a wk?

i like this weekend.. can hide away all unhappiness in work.. cos i feel happy that i still got friends ard me when i need them.. :P

Screwed up at work~~

2009-02-05T00:55:00.002+08:00

haiz~~ nowadays had been quite screwed up at work.. is either too careless or do something wrong.. hahahaa.. and i always go against my big boss.. Opps.. he will be the one who determine my bonus.. :X haiz~~ this year gt bonus or not also a big problem, since now everywhere is retrenching.. as long as i can keep my job, i should be happy, right... dun ask for too much... haiz~~

recently i got talked to him.. maybe i grumble a bit abt my work and studies.. haha.. dunno leh.. i think bcos he always reply me with caring.. makes me hor~~ so scare i will fall again.. haiz~~

work not doing well + studies not doing well + relationship also not handling in the correct way... haiz~~ i also dunno..

tiring week~~~

2009-01-20T00:47:00.003+08:00

Hahahaa.. What had i been doing for the past one whole week? Nowadays, i starts school le.. of cos i had become more and more busy. Furthermore this module is mainly on english~~ omg~~ tat is something i am damn weak at it, especially i still need to write essay for it. -_-'''' i hoped i can pass ba~~~

Last week, i did a lot of stupid stuff sia~~ I met up with korkor and his partner.. haha.. they brought me to mandarin oriental hotel lounge there for drinks.. haha.. damn high class hor? so unlike me sia~~ such high class places not really suit me ba~~ maybe based of my character, furthermore i am so clumsy..

Sat, i went out with my mum n my friend to buy cny's clothes. Something weird happened on tat day. Someone sms me to ask for a loan, furthermore the loan that she requested from me is consider quite a big sum of money for me. Erm, i just make payments for my school fees, how to provide loan for others? Guess she really look for the wrong person. How come she come and borrow money from a poor student? It is such a big joke sia. If i am so rich enough, i will not ought to study part-time. I will go for full-time studies. Cos currently seems like i am pretty screwed up in my studies and work. Hopefully, my boss not going to kill me soon ba~~ News everyday mentioning abt retrenchment.. Seriously, i start to scare whether will it happen to me or not. Time to make plans during rainy day ba~~~ my job won't be stable as wat others thing cos mainly it will be based on performance. Guess my performance is the bottom last, but i will try my best to muggle my studies and work.

At Night, i went out with friends. I met up with my friend at mustafa first bcos he wanted to get a new hp, samsung pixon. Wah lau.. he damn rich lor~~ keep changing phone.. :X heheheee.. finally persuade him not to eat sushi tei.. :P He met up with my another friend also.. hahah.. bcos i am meeting her for ktv.. :P it had been ages that i had been to ktv sia~~ luckily is cheap on that day.. :P haha.. my friend and her bf and brother came over to join us.. Wow~~ first time met her bf's brother sia~~ looks damn young lor~~ haha... later at nite, they send me home.. :P heng~~

Sunday, i went to do hair with my colleague~~ :P supposely to meet up with brothers they all.. but ended up.. i am really too tired...

haha.. today got someone msg me.. abt him and his gf.. haha.. surprisingly.. i dun feel anything when he told me wat happened.. hopefully both of them will be ok~~ dun think so much..

只是一支签

2009-01-11T13:29:00.001+08:00

hahaaha...昨天我去了四马路的观音庙，我也求了一支签。

第六十五簽下簽卯宮　古人孫濱困龐涓

眼前歡喜未為歡，亦不危時亦不安；
割肉成瘡為甚事，不如守舊待時光。

hahaaha.. wat does it means...

静静的一个星期。。。

2009-01-04T01:38:00.003+08:00

这几天我过着一个很平静，也想了很多。。如果人生能这么简单该多好，可是往往都不会是这样的。。在星期五，我拿了一天的假期，去了马拉西亚走了一回。我好久都没有陪妈妈出去走一走。。我知道从下星期开始，我又要过着一个忙碌的一年了。休息了三个礼拜，又是开学的时候了。

心理有点痛痛的。。哈哈。。我想到好多以前的事情。。其实hor.. 可能我真的喜欢他那么深，只是我有一点放不下吧。。他很疼我，每天都听我唠叨，诉苦，所以让我习惯的被人疼得感觉，可是一切并没有持续很久。好像一切都是我一厢情愿的吧。其实对感情这回事，我已经不想去想了。有了好，没有也算了吧！

在这新的一年，我希望能减肥成功，并不是为了要赢我的好友。。只是我觉得我堕落了好久，是时候为自己做一点事。我好像从来都没有为我自己打算以下。。不应该这么stubborn.

这几年我也想清楚，有一段时间我真的很气他，一切都过去了。。你hor，让我学会了很多事情，我也学会坚强了许都。。谢谢您。。 :)

我也学会了一件事，不要爱上你的好朋友。我因为爱上我的好朋友而失去了一个很要好的好朋友。如果每有他，我相信有很多难关我都挨不下去。其实你离开了我也是一间好事，让我有一个理由难过伤心，也有个机会让我自己知道自己的酒量到底有多好。哈哈！！从以前开始我说过我要学会珍惜身边的一切，可是那一次和他分开后，我并没有应为那时的事情而变得成熟，而却是应为你我学会了珍惜。

哈哈！！真好笑，这几年我都过着一个很愚蠢的生活，希望新的一年我会学的变得更聪明，在事业与学业能够兼顾的好。不要向以前一样，胡里胡涂的过日子。

在这一年，我希望我不要依赖brothers们那么多。以一个woman的直觉，每有一个woman希望自己的男朋友和他的好朋友那么好吧。。谁不会吃醋的阿！！哈哈！！这证明了一样事，我是一个醋坛子。 :)

I AM STUPID!!!!!

2008-12-09T19:28:00.003+08:00

ARGH!!!! i think i am stupid.. and is nt stupid only.. IS EXTREMELY STUPID!!! haiz!!!!

i am slow and stupid.. haiz~~~

我老板快要给我气死了！！！我觉得我笨到一种无可救药的地步！！！做事经常放错，我好气自己啊！

黄小姐，不要一直做个糊涂虫，你已经24岁了！！还那么没有用！！！真是一个蠢才！！！

i start to wondering, can i really survive in this private sector world? do i suits to contiune to work here? haiz~~~ i doubt i can cope to with the fast pace in my work.. haiz~~ between work and studies can i really cope it? my studies went chaos.. now my work also went chaos.. haiz~~ guess my life is in a mess now~~~

so should i consider that i dun have a bf now? otherwise maybe my relationship will went chaos too? or maybe he can hear me complain~~~

haiz~~ guess maybe this weekend should be a clubbing week or drinking week..

double combo.. can i take it?

2008-12-09T19:28:00.000+08:00

ARGH!!!!!

2008-12-01T15:44:00.002+08:00

haiz~~ dunno is my communication skills got problem or... haiz~~ sian sian~~ starting to feel that my work topple.. :( ARGH~~~ not happy not happy nt happy!!! things just dun go the way, i wants.. so MESSY!!! haiz~ a bit back like wat was happening in my ex-company.. can i handle it this time round with a better attitude.. hahaa.. we shall see.. guess i will just simply bo chap it.. cos the communication in between is like break down lor~~~ KAOZ!!! nobody seems like knows wat is the correct way and method.. communication break down across sia~~~
one wants this.. one wants that.. end up.. wat i do.. is wrong.. -_-'''' i just follow requirements de mah.. haiz~~ if u all know the requirements are wrong hor~~ why didn't said it out in the first place.. now then kp that is wrong.. haiz~~~ i very sian leh.. sob sob.. wants to proves that i am not so incapable.. ended up.. it can only show one thing.. i am getting more and more incapable.. and STUPID!!!!! haiz~~~

Had been very busy recently~~

2008-11-27T22:13:00.003+08:00

Hahaa... i overslept on my gd friend's wedding. Hopefully tat day, 我不时很失态吧！！我好像说错话了。 yy, you are so pretty that day.. hehee.. 我会加油的，赢到我的台湾机票！！看齐来我已经决定我明年要去台湾了。。会去的成功吗? 明年就有答案了。

haha.. during that week, i was on two days of mc and one day of leave. No choice, i had to go back to work on sunday when she was having her dinner.. :X I rushed to parkway to get a birthday gift for her which i saw it a few days ago.. hahaa.. :P should had bought it earilier hor.. otherwise i won't be that late.. Hahaha.. guess i looks a bit weird that nite.. looks like a kiddy sia~~ haha..

after tat week.. wat did i do arh.. erm.. let me think.. i cannot recall of anyting~~~ orh~~ i went to changi airport to do my assignment after my lesson. when i reached home is ard 9plus am~~ super shag hor~~ take a nap le.. then my uncle came over to my house and said something happened to my auntie~~ haiZ~~~ i..................... at nite, i went to meet up with my poly friends.. lol.. had my dinner at waraku pasta.. once a while gathering.. still consider not bad ba~~ as when u gets old, everyone started to have their different life, is hard to have a gathering session. haiz~~ sob sob.. seems like i am eagerly to find one now~~ haha.. i also dunno... maybe just like my korkor said de.. i too long never been in love le.. i had lose the way how to love someone le.. or so called i dunno how to cherish pple. guess is still better to stay low profile.. once in a while, i got friends asked me out can le~~~ hear me su ku.. complain can le~~ dun need always i entertain them.. haha.. :P
Sunday, i met my brothers.. haha.. my friend called me out, i asked her to join us together.. hehee.. after we bought the tickets hor~~ brother said he is going to treat me.. :P so nice of him~~ treat me eat... wahahaa.. i stole his phone.. still got free meals.. not bad hor... hahaa.. :P my brothers arh.. they are like that de.. treat me like a male de.. haiz~~ of cos i kept quiet to my friend that he actually treating me~~ otherwise very weird leh~~~

last wk... was a wk of chionging assignment.. chiong until like mad woman.. skips lunch, no lunching outside.. stay in office.. everyday sleeps 3-5 hours.. sob sob.. complexion getting worst.. haiz~~ luckily nowadays never met up with korkor.. otherwise he sure kp abt me.. he sure said u sure nobody wants le.. hahaaha.. i know this is the truth le.. :X 我应经看开了`。。。 lol.. :P

My friend got her bonus le~~ haha.. she treats me kushinbo.. hehee.. i kept quiet in front of another friend also.. paiseh~~~ go eat together mah.. after tat we went to watch Madagascar.. then i took a bus home.. hahaa.. my another gd friend asked me to go clubbing.. i super shag le~~ where got energy to go clubbing.. in the end, i miss a chance to meet up with a yandao.. sob sob.. :'( based on wat she said arh.. tat guy very yandao leh.. cos she seldom will said guys yandao de.. hahaa.. she is a chio bu wor~~ of cos her taste for guys is higher..

Sunday, i went to loreal fair.. haha.. bought some stuffs.. of cos 大少爷complain that i am always late.. Ask me to learn punctuality.. sob sob.. :( dun he knows bcos of late.. i lose someone.. hahaha.. but everything over le.. no point to mention it again le...

Assignment + Gd Friend's Wedding

2008-11-02T19:42:00.004+08:00

Haahhaa.. Recently i am being tied down by my assignment and gd friend's wedding.. As u can know.. i thinks i belong to a person who likes to enjoy going out often.. hahaha... my parents used to say,"why last time we never tied your legs when u are still a baby?" Guess now is too late.. Hahaahaa.. I paid 1k plus for the first module yet my first assignment still remain untouch. This reminds me about the times when i was in poly. Hahaha.. In poly, always got kw aka my shifu helped me a lot~~ OF cos still got my buddies in poly lah.. hahaa.. the four of us are famous for last minute. Last minute study until next day morning then go school take exams.. Hahahaa.. but now, 1 bcome career woman, another 1 bcomes xin fu de nu ren, while ceo remains uncontactable.. hahaa.. while as for me.. still remains kiddy like last time.. hahaa.. guess each time they talked to me also wants to puke blood.

Hahahaa.. seriously, i guess i belong to the type very emotional ba~~ erm... seriously my colleagues treat me quite good ba~~ they knows that i am currently studying.. on the first day, they will offer me cakes and yougurt drink, to encourage me to school.. hahaa.. now assignment is going to hand up soon le, they asking me whether i need any help or not. She will help me.. hahaa.. seriously, everyone bcomes more mature than wat i know.. yet i am still as kiddy as i am... hahaa.. is it time to find someone to look after me.. haha.. but is quite hard, currently i dun have anyone in mind nor anyone going after me.. haha... time to concentrate on my studies ba~~ hopefully i can find one before i graduate.. hahaa.. hopefully he can go aus with me to celebrate the joy with me that i had graduate after struggling for my studies. i dun mind to be lightbulb for 1 year but not longer ba~~ haha.. lao tian ye arh~~~ bu yao zhe yang mah.. lol.. :P wo tu ran jian hao xiang bei ai de gang jue~~~ lol.. :P guess wo hai shi dang ge xiao nu ren hao ba~~~

hahaa.. ytd i met my gd friend with a gal.. haha.. surprisingly, i dun have that kind of the feelings.. hahahaa.. no feelings at all lor~~ later when i am at tampines, i met my classmates.. then when i go cineleisure to meet my friends, i met my ex-colleagues... hahaa.. within one day, i met 3 persons sia~~~ hw come arh..

ahhahahaahaa..

5 more days to assignment date due.. i wondering can i finish before it or i had to take mc or leave le.

1 more wk to yy's wedding le~~ time passes super fast, i knew her for more than 10 years.. now she is getting married le~~ while i still remain single.. hahaa... wo xi wang ta xin fu..

to me, i think when u reached wedding stage, is another phrase in life, in this phrase, there are different things/stuffs to learn :
- hw to live in harmony with your husband's family
- hw to cook
- hw to keep the love between both of u keep burning till u all are old..
- hw to etc.................

Hehehe.. :P

2008-10-28T00:10:00.002+08:00

Next year holiday trip

2008-10-27T02:53:00.002+08:00

hahaa...Fix destination for next year will be Taiwan.. hahahaa.. I had a bet with brother.. lol.. :P if i manage to slim down by next year.. one free air ticket to taiwan.. lol.. :P

i had another agreement with niao niao wor~~ if we both manage to shed away extra fats.. next year, we will all go taiwan to celebrate my next year birthday.. :P

hahaha.. i must determine to do it.. :P

Min.. JIA YOU!! cannot lose this bet wor~~

Birthday Celebration

2008-10-27T02:24:00.002+08:00

hahaa.. i had a very very very tired birthday celebration..

guess i wondering izzit bcos i am so stress up with studies and work.. tat's why i dun enjoy it.. hahaha.. i also dunno.. or bcos there aren't any surprises?

I starts my birthday celebration on friday nite.. after my lesson, i went to vivocity to meet niao niao.. haha.. she very poor thing leh.. waiting for us till late nite.. luckily got her colleague accompany her, otherwise she will curse and swear at us. lol.. :P we had our dinner at terra cafe while waiting for da jie to join us.. hehe.. da jie joined us at 11plus then we headed down to clarke quay. sad to said, most of the pubs that we wants to go, all were quite packed. Actually i wanted to go pump room, too bad, too crowded. So we went back to iguana, same place as last year. :) so sweet hor, da jie they all always accompanied me to celebrate my birthday. haha.. guess they knows i dun have a lot of friends.. :P As usual kiddo haven grown up, haiz~~ Among three of us, although i am not the youngest yet i am the most kiddo de. 1 years older le, yet i still haven grown up. sian~ hope next year, i still can have my birthday celebration with da jie they all, and this time i will be much more mature. Guess da jie that day was deadbeat, she worked until 11plus. Then still need to entertain me till 1 plus.. hehe.. :P da jie and niao niao so wei da.. lol.. :P

Sat, went to school for lesson. Sob sob.. :( no mood sia~~ haiz~~ tired plus sian~~ no choice lah.. pay school fees le, still can dun want to go meh? plus i study to get a degree, in order i can support my parents next time. haiz~ can give up meh? dun study , cannot get a good pay, then next time how can i support them? After school, got a call from kelvin... lol.. :P end of up quarreling bcos of timing for bbq.. too busy le lah~~

Meet Edmund for dinner before he fled back to aus. Haha.. although he came back for four days hor~~ he still meets me for dinner.. hehe.. so good.. :P sweet sia~~ lol.. i knows him for too long le.. :P

After dinner.. meet kelvin they all to look at the bbq food.. haha.. when he first met me, face super black lor~ haha.. :P ended up.. we went to have dinner at food court, followed by sashimi.. yummy.. my favourite sashimi swordfish.. :P, and dessert at swensen.. haha..

Ard 11plus, i went back home to change.. haha.. I went st james with my friends plus my brothers they all.. lol... :P so ke lian~~ they need to entertain me till 3 plus.. haha.. furthermore my friend's bf need to work at 8am the next day.. lol.. :P

I slept ard 5plus lor~~ sob sob.. :(

erm.. early in the morning, kelvin called me to go downstair and pick up food.. haiz~~ not enuff sleep sia~~

haiz~~ i also dunno leh.. dun really happy during the bbq.. i also dunno..

is bcos i am too tired? or bcos i am too sian ? or ?????

on the way back, i kept very quiet wor~~ haha.. brother very sweet.. he called me when he received my msg.. i told him i wasn't happy for this year birthday~~ he called to concern for me.. haha.. after hand up the phone.. i wanted to sms him to tell him.. haha.. dun let me rely on u.. but ended up, i never send.. :X

SO tired.. now need to chiong for assignment.. hopefully both of them will support me till the end.. :P

hahaa.. my colleague also very sweet.. hehe.. she said if i got any problems for my assignment.. i can ask her.. she will be guiding me.. hehee.. :P

Tired

2008-10-21T02:25:00.002+08:00

Haiz~~
nowadays very busy.. got a lot of things to be handle.. haiz~~

1) School starts already
2) Work getting more and more
3) Assignment date due next week..
4) BBQ this sunday
5) My best friend's wedding coming soon..

hahaa.. seriously.. nowadays i see so many pple ard me having care and dotes by their bfs.. i feels so envy sia~~ haiz~~ maybe i dun have the destiny to find the one yet ba~~

last sat, i went ktv with a niao niao.. haha.. her bf's very sweet wor.. waited for her till late nite when she goes home.. then when she sings, she will call him and let him listen.. wow... sweet hor~~ miss my old past.. where got someone waits for me to reach home.. haiz~~

其实我又开始迷失我的方向了

2008-10-05T01:17:00.003+08:00

不懂为什么最静越来越喜欢用华语来述说我的心。当我觉得我有迷失我的方向时，我一点多不觉得很奇怪。为什么，我又有了这种感觉？是不是因为，我周围的人都得到爱他们的人或者都遇到疼爱她们的人，而我还是一个人走在这个人上吗？其实自己的人生道路并不比那些在生命边界徘徊的人来的痛苦。我想开一点不是没事了吗？可是，是我不懂得珍惜过他吗？为什么我动不动又再想起他？是我还没放手吗？还是我一直以来都不懂我自己要的是什么？其实，时间都过了那么久，我真的没放过手吗？还是我根本不懂得什么是爱？我有没有伤过人或者是他吗？其实，我也不知道。很可能，他现在已经是别人的爸爸了，我还在这里不知道该如何是好？哈哈，我真的觉得自己很傻，也很愚笨，笨到不懂极点。

我可以不可以醒来，真的要那么愚笨的过我的人生吗？我已经傻傻的过了要到24年了，在这么过下去，我会得到我的幸福吗？虽然别人总说傻人有傻福。。哈哈！！！！我觉得是假的。

这段日子不要爱上任何人!! 一定要找回自己失去的方向才来说。我相信我可以在自己25岁时找到我自己的方向！！黄小姐，加油wor！！不可以那么轻易就放弃自己的未来，我相信我自己可以找到我的彩虹!!!

Tipsy

2008-09-29T00:55:00.001+08:00

Guess Tipsy is the kind of feeling i had now. I will try to numb myself in work and in studies and maybe my private life. but guess this is the moment, i do wish to be alone for a while.

So0o0o0o0o0o0oooo Painful :(

2008-09-24T23:23:00.002+08:00

Today i took half day and went to do medical checkup.. haiz~~ didn't know need to do blood test.. so painful~~ this is the second time that i do blood test in my whole entire life.. :( sob sob.. is the auntie dunno hw to poke or ???? guess tml going to be blue black liao~~ haiz~~ i guess sooner or later.. i need to go to pluck out my wisdom tooth le.. but hor~~ i dun dare.. haiz~~~ :( but the clinic had The Arcade had a very nice view. I can oversee the whole of marina bay.. Hehee.. considered quite lucky cos i took afternoon leave, therefore i can avoid all jams. Pray hard, nothing goes wrong for my checkup. Otherwise, i will go bersek leh..
*****Praying very hard********

Last Week arh.. Wat i did arh..

Erm.. I met my buddies for dinner.. Hehee.. :P Supposing i only meet one of them for dinner.. The other one said he nt free, going gym. Ok lor, dun want to force him. Had a short chat with one of my buddies lah.. Then suddenly another one called me, "I just finished OT leh,i come down now to find u all." Hahaha.. Stunned.. We purposely bought Venti drink at Starbucks to wait for him lor~~ Wah lau.. I drink coffee until i wants to puke liao.. of cos lah.. they started to said abt my past and my current.. haiz~~ makes me feel so guilty.. so regret.. wat had happened to me.. gain quite a lot of weight during my 2 years in my ex-company.. sob sob.. now trying very hard to shed them away lor.. haiz~~ jia you hor~~~ one asked me go california gym with him.. another one asked me to join his gf to go gym together.. omg~~~ he still ask me to learn from his gf sia~~ haha.. his gf is my idol liao~~ time to learn from her.. hehee.. i wants to become mei mei de and find a bf.... :X let's see hw long my determination will last this time round.. :P

hahaha... touch hor~~ my friend actually rushed down from tuas to meet me.. hahaa.. :P seriously.. really feel happy at the moment.. now i know.. no matter hw far they are from me.. they are still with me.. i wondering how long will this last.. :X Opps.. am i questioning hw friendly u all are towards me.. Erm.. no lah.. we better dun stay too close.. later your gfs misunderstand, how?

last sat.. i went to eat steamboat with a friend(Secret) and my ex-colleague.. haha.. Secret of cos being very sweet lah.. always cook for me n my friend to eat.. haha... opps.. seems like wat my ex-colleagues said is right.. my gd friends are all guys.. :( later they scare away my future bf, hw? hahaha.. no lah.. they just treat me as a guy buddy.. hahaaha... i think everytime after my steamboat hor.. i will start to sa jiao leh.. OMG!!!! hehee.. i think i purposely de.. they scare.. then i purposely do more.. oppps.. i looks like very rebellious wor~~ Wahahahaa.. :P

I think i did tat to my buddies too when i am a bit tipsy.. haha.. but luckily their gfs ard.. otherwise i will kana whack.. Opps.. must control a bit le wor.. is not like in the past where everybody still single... Wahahaa.. :P

Sort of miss someone so much.. haha.. his friend told me he getting married this year.. haha.. he so caring~~ the first guy who is so caring towards me.. wahaha.. maybe bcos i saw the injuries i had, reminds me abt him.. haha.. when i go out dating with him, he saw me blue black.. Faster bring me to watson and buy all types of medical oils and etc.. Ask me next time must be careful, ok? dun always hurt yourself.. so sweet hor~~ hehee.. plus my xiao xin is from him too as birthday gift.. haha... :P

Puzzled & Confused..

2008-09-14T02:27:00.002+08:00

Hahahaa.. Seriously, my feelings had become a mixture of beer and red wine that makes me so drunk now. But it does not means i am drunk physically.. just that i am mentally puzzled and confused.

Last weekend, i meet up with my friends, of cos is organized by me due to i got a few friends having birthday. Haahaha.. A bit disappointed tat day ba, but i am ok lah.. trying my best to keep everyone laughing.. hehee.. :P

These few weeks i ate cake until i almost puke le.. Fattening~~
1) Chocolate cake from The Chocoz.. Omg.. is very rich with chocoalte..
2) Durians Cake from four season.. hehee.. i love durians but the cream is too rich~~
3) Mango Cheese cake from rive gauche... hehe.. nice nice.. but it might be too heaty~
4) Chocolate cake from four leaves.. hehe.. nice nice.. but again.. cream!!!

haha.. after consitantly eating so many cakes.. makes min fall sick again.. omg.. she is so weak now~~

haiz~~ of cos i still went to eat steamboat twice this week.. omg~~ i am not going to eat tat again next week..

One good news to share.. but i share wait until time is ripe then share it out..

haha.. now puzzled and confused part is... i realised something.. he started dun want to share with me his relationship.. tat makes me think in another way.. haha.. but i know is impossible.. a lot of pple starting to guess whether things had gone the wrong way.. haha.. i would like to said.. at the moment is no.. in future is even going to be a big NO.. haha.. pls lah.. he won't like me de...

i had a short chat with him just now.. which is something we dun really do most of the time.. sometimes we will just crap for a while.. he reminds me abt the incident which i did stupidly a year ago.. erm.. of cos.. we started to crap abt my birthday.. he asked me when is my birthday.. haha.. of cos is in oct lah.. ask me when is the date.. siao.. u think i nuts meh.. u had never remember my birthday before.. i doubt that this year.. u will remember it..

hahaa.. as for a celebration or not.. i dunno leh.. the more i hopes it to be.. the more i am scare it will just turn out to be disappointment.. everytime min hopes something to turn well, things will just go haywire. The more i want to be mei mei to go my hao jie mei wedding.. i know sure last min shall got something pops up de.. i dun want to think so much.. maybe is bcos i scare ba.. or i had lose the definition of like, love, habit? i starting to realise i dunno hw to definte any of these words anymore..

haha.. so u asked me wat is this kind of feelings.. i also dunno leh.. just that when i heard him talking to his gf.. sometimes.. i will feel extremely down.. and trying ways to walk away and hide away my feelings.. but there are times that i just encourage him.. i started to puzzle.. wat does this kind of feelings called? maybe he can sense that i am feeling uncomfortable.. tat's why he stopped mentioning his gf in front of me. hahaa.. i dunno.. i started to confuse myself.. maybe i am just afraid i will lose a friend.. there are times that i falling down, i need someone to console me.. haha.. i started to realise i dun have the courage to sms him anymore.. i even told myself... no no.. i can't do that anymore.. ended up, it will just bcome a draft that i never send..

haha.. today, i asked da jie.. hw to make myself more sociable. she gave me one sentence "Open up yourself". How to do it? "Find it out yourself" haha.. i knows wat she means, of cos min is someone who always lock herself in her room.. she seldom will open up herself.. i am not a person who will open that easily ba~~ haha.. i should open more easily.. meet up with more pple.. maybe i will slowly fade away this feelings ba..

maybe bcos of a lesson that i had a few years back.. i started to scare to make the same mistake again.. hahaha.. past is past.. i should no longer looks back.. hw can i always be so persistant to return back to the past..

haha.. i should concentrate on my studies... of cos in my work too.. hopefully i dun screw up a lot of things at work.. and cause disappointment to my bosses..

Hehehe.. Birthday Gift

2008-09-01T00:58:00.003+08:00

hahaha.. Last friday, i went to have dinner at cafe cartel... followed by steamboat.. crazy right? Plus having dessert at Ah Chew's dessert place. After eating and eating, i walked to mostafa.. Wahahhaa... :P I saw something which i like leh.. I dropped hint to my two qing ai de brothers.. Hahaha.. Both of us very cute hor.. One moment quarrel, one moment ok.. haha.. Crazy right.. As usual, we are always like that.. Ok lah.. Sometimes he quite pamper me.. But now cannot always liao~ Both of them got gfs liao~~ Erm.. Can i request this one successfully.. Erm.. I doubt it.. Just share with everyone.. haha.. Any hao xin ren wants to buy this for me? Erm.. Guess i had to get this myself~~ Hahaa... :P Last year, i aim a guess watch.. aim until i never buy.. this year, will i buy this puma to pamper myself.. Haha.. Sometimes i wondering.. both of my brothers quite understand me sia~~ haha.. when i am looking at a bag.. one will said "dun envy lah.. go buy lah.. " Then i tell them i am attached.. One of them will said "U believe in her meh?" Erm.. i really got so bad arh? nobody wants? sob sob.. anyway i am used to it liao~~ i really belongs to a category that nobody wants.. wahaha.. =p destined to be single for my lifetime.. haha.. is time to learn independent.. haha.. (Da jie, dun puke when u saw this post.. plus korkor hor.. ) Erm.. Da jie knew me for 6 years.. As usual i am still so childish, immature, spoilt brat.. Korkor knew me for more than 10 years, omg.. i still so dependent on others.. although he might find me that i had grown up by 0.01%? Now is i scold him, not that he scold me.. Wahahaahaa.. :P Opps.. Now i had become the evil one.. Lol.. :P

Hehee.. Brothers they all said planning to help me to celebrate my birthday. Erm.. This year, i had never planned to celebrate my birthday, guess i will have a peaceful birthday ba~~ cos all should be busy pa toh, where got time to entertain me.. :( furthermore i got lessons on the 25th.. Haiz~~ each year also dun have pple celebrate with me.. except ~~last year..~~ last three years..

21th birthday,i had a chalet at east coast. End up they use my cake as flying cakes.. Hahaha.. I drank a bottle of white wine which i bought a few years back from australia.. Chasing one another with the cakes.. i so good leh.. offering other pple cakes, ended up kana sabo.. hehe.. plus nanny accompany me to watch the 40 year old virgin plus a meal at swensen ba~~~

22nd birthday, i had a chalet too this year.. Futhermore is a halloween decoration chalet at downtown east.. Heavy sponsor by my dearest friend, yy.. haha.. opps... she almost going to kill me le.. lol.. :P had a great fun there, just that we had a quarrelled with our next door neighbour due to bbq pit. Hahaha.. :P oh ya~~ i almost forget le.. We went to Zouk the day before wor~~ then sy, yy, plus dunno who and me come out first.. We walked to clarke quay and sit down.. Futhermore, we went to liang court to have a macdonald breakfast... Then took the eariliest train back to downtown east. No wonder we are so guai lah.. Then once we return back to chalet room, queueing up to bath so that we can sleep.. Hahaa.. :P Ended up dunno which idiot come around 11 plus..then wake all of us up.. we were saying~~ omg~~ we just slept for a while~~ around evening time.. chef comes liao~~ saw the food that we had bbq.. dunno bring who go supermarket to buy food.. wahaha.. :P he bought chocolate and melt.. haha.. then i use ham & chicken wings to dip inside the chocolate.. Ended up.. kana scolded.. -_-'''''' Tat time both of my brothers are attached... plus one of friends... but all broke up in the end.. now they are with different partners le.. hehe.. of cos.. my dearest yy.. also getting marry at the end of the year le.. :P On the actual date, i think nanny very poor thing sia~~ waited for me after work for quite long.. We went to watch the magician show~~ haha.. see.. my memory still quite good right.. haven turned rusty yet...

23th birthday.. haha.. I had a few cakes.. one frm my primary school friend, one frm my ex-colleagues, one frm my da jie n niao niao, one was frm my buddies they all. But the last cake WAS WORST OUT OF ALL.. Is just a small cupcake, ended up it bcome a flying cake... -_-''''''' luckily, was just a small celebration downstair, otherwise i will be dead.. guess everyone will be looking at me sia, if i board bus back home..

This year.. They planning to bring me go clubbing on that day.. Hahaha.. I thinks they only talk talk only right.. will not come true de right.. haha.. asked me go book chalet.. haha.. too bad.. no chalet.. haha.. so stayed at home is the best.. :P just pass me the present can le.. :)

First Hint for my birthday present~~

Puma Stardust Ladies Watch.. Nice nice.. =p

haha.. after having so many years of happening birthday.. really not getting use of a peaceful birthday leh.. haha.. but must slowly getting use to it.. they where got time to entertain me sia~~ all is either attach or getting marry soon le~~ sob sob.. :( hahaa.. Getting married de arh.. Next time u pregnant liao.. must tell me arh.. i helped u take care of your baby when is young.. lol.. :P should be very cute de right.. wahahahaaa.... :P so anxious abt my school plus someone's wedding.. hahaa.. :P first time sia~~ hahaha.. ytd kana 'takan' by my brothers they all.. haiz~~ said.. "Your target is in november leh... then now.......... " -_-'''' haiz~~~ :(

TIME TO BUCK UP

ICE~~

2008-08-29T01:09:00.003+08:00

haha.. actually wants to blog about food.. ended up no mood..
sian~~~ afternoon drink tea + coffee.. then just now went to drink coffee bean~~ omg.. today i took too much of caffine~~ omg~~ cannot sleep liao~~

haha.. seriously this week.. i really did something weird sia~~ haha.. had lunch with my long lost friend.. then just now i had coffee with my cousins..

as for my long lost friend.. of cos, it had been a long long time that i really talk to her..

as for my cousins.. haha.. even worst.. i seldom talk to them.. this consider as long talk ba? or ?????

haha.. of cos after i come back from my coffee drinking session.. saw some emails floating in my mail box.. the first one i saw for the gathering.. i almost wants to puke blood or so called i want to straggle pple liao... ARGH~~ u better dun let me see u at the gathering.. FINE~~ we shall fight.. see how will wins.. haha.... :P diao~~ had a short chat with my friend online.. he saw the email.. he said.. "Why both of u fight? You two ma chiam like couple.. " !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the problem we are not.. furthermore he got gf de.. he just wants to irritate me.. or he scare i nobody wants.. wants me faster find a bf.. so i won't disturb..

FINE LOR~~ I GOT BF.. and I AM ATTACHED~~ hahaa.. just tat i never tell u only.. wahaha.. :P

Fireworks~~

2008-08-25T00:09:00.004+08:00

Woohoo~~ Of cos fireworks was something that i will not miss especially if there is anyone to accompany me to watch it. Wahaha.. Contiunously, i watched two fireworks shows. Yipee, this year fireworks were so fantastic. I simply just love it so much. On Sat, i got a very good view but seriously i am still a scary cat. While watching fireworks, i was starting to scare, what if i slipped and fall in somewhere near clifford pier there, how? What will happened and etc....... Opps, wondering is it because i am the only child at home, that's why i am this kind of thinking. I need to help my parents to think also mah..... Hahaha.. Or i am just finding an excuses for myself.

Friday, after work. Dad drove me to my ex-company to find my ex-colleagues. Hahaa.. Of cos is my ex-colleagues accompany to watch.. Arbo, still got who accompany me sia~~ lol.. :P Erm.. Had my dinner at vines.. Yummy, it had been so long that i ever eat that. I am starting to miss food over at novena, mainly because i had nothing much over at my workplace now except nasi lemak. OMG, i am so sick of nasi lemak, i will try my best to avoid that but the problem is i don't know what to eat. Guess the next coming month, i had to start to be much more thrify, time to mixed vegetable rice. :( for weight loss and save. Only once in a week, eat something good. Stop going out that often, try to stay home. But the problem is maybe nobody will ask me out cos everyone started to have their partners and busy life le. After my fireworks,i went to The Cathay, trying to catch Journey Over the Center of Earth. But the problem is no shows over there, ended up had to walk to cineleisure. Watched the last two matches of pingpong over at cineleisure kbox before went in to catch the movie. Seriously, i really like this movie. This is a movie must watched sia. If is converted to a 3D movie or 4D movie, i will go and catch it. But provided someone accompany. Omg, i realised i am really not independent at all. :( Sianz~~ After the movie, as usual, i had to wait for 1 hour for 4N. Haiz~~ SBS don't have enough drivers for night drivers, ended up it become i am suffering. OMG~~ I think i am commuters right, commuters should entitle for their own benefits right? Should be they trying ways to upgrade themselves right? Maybe if the market is not so bad now, i guess i most likely will hop onto a cab and go back home to sleep asap. Instead of spending one hour at the bus stop waiting for my bus. No choice lah, cheapskate!!!!! Wanted to take a $2.50 bus home, cos i am broke for the month. 1 4N = 2 others night riders... Why har? No traffic jam late at night leh? Most of the night riders took the same route, just that after selegie, most of the riders will go different ways. But i am waiting at midpoint ORCHARD leh? WTH~~~~ IRIS said 19 mins but the problem is aftr 19 mins, i still couldn't see 4N. -_-''' IRIS got bugs mah? or something is wrong with my network or even my phone sia? There is a point of time where it state, it can detect the next bus. -_-'''' Or is bcos 4N is very unlucky, it will suddenly disappear. Or why not change to something else? like 9N to replace 4N? So the waiting time can cut down to half an hour instead of an hour. Do you know is very poor thing to stand at the bus-stop late at night to wait for a bus that will never comes?

Saturday~~
Due to the bus delay, i reached home around 3 plus. Wah Piang~~ I came out of the theatre at 1 plus. Ended up almost 2.30pm then the bus came. My friend had already reached home, while i just board bus. I woke up around 1 plus in the afternoon. I suppose to go airport to fetch a friend who just came back from aboard. Or considered as my good friend. But due to hongkong got typhoon, flight had been delayed again and again. Therefore i had been keep looking at the website to wait for the confirm time. Then i will leave home for the airport. Sad..... Only certain flights then it will state confirm. -_-''' Haiz~~ is i being too demanding? How come website will only indicate for some airlines. Some airlines will only stated delay .... (time), while some airlines will state confirm .... (time). Therefore, it mislead me lah, let me tot that is not confirmed. I don't dare to go out that early, furthermore is raining heavily outside. But my gd friend had reached before i reached sia. -_-''' feel so guilty sia~~~

Around evening time, i went to meet a friend for fireworks, as usual, i am late. Seriously before meeting my friend, i got such a complex feelings sia. That day, i suppose to meet friends for birthday celebration but i don't want to go that early. I even had the thoughts of not going at all. Erm..... I will not indicate who is this. Haha.. Otherwise things might get worst than i thought. One of my friend msg me telling me that they were at bugis too, wondering whether i will meet them for dinner or not. Of cos on the way walking to find my friend, i kept telling myself, i dun want to meet up with them sia. What is the reason behind that = secret. Wahahaha.. :P When i met up with my gf, i told her my friend had encountered a problem. But i guess most likely she knows is me, i trying so hard to shift to it to bcome someone else. I sounds very bad right, but no choice. She knows my cousins sia, don't want things to get worst. During the chatting with her, i realise there were a lot of things which i had never take note at all. I had never thought whether the things that i do will makes anyone unhappy or not or causes any misunderstanding or not. To me, friends are friends, regardless is guy or girl, isn't it the same? Since now is what generation already, i realise it might be different from my thinkings liao. From the talk with her, makes me think far a bit. But i didn't pick up someone calls, i was keep trying avoid it. I can sense that he is quite pissed off with it. I only reply my friend's msgs. I suppose to join them to eat no signboard seafood with them but i didn't go. I rather watched fireworks than eating. Haha.. :P He knows me so well sia, he said i loves fireworks. All of them had mistaken that i went to watch with my bf, of cos i didn't bother to explain so much already. I still reject his calls when i am watching fireworks. Hahaha.. :P Watching the fireworks cure the pain inside my heart. Very abnormal right? Haha.. Maybe i am not too deep yet? I still can put it out easily. Concentrate on my studies and work ba, don't ever think of that anymore. Supposing to meet up with a guy friend after the fireworks, haha.. i think once i told him i was with that gal.. He said is ok~~ next time ba~~ lol.. or maybe bcos someone never tag along with us, he felt disappointed? Wahaha.. Met up with the gal's friend. Hahaha.. The gal said i am bubbly gal. Erm.. Am i a bubbly gal? I started to ponder about it. Why they thinks i am a bubbly gal? Maybe they never see the side that i am sad before? Even the guy also said i am a bubbly gal sia.. Something is wrong sia, i didn't know i am a bubbly gal. Wahaha.. Or maybe bcos now i started to things easily, don't want to care so much. Maybe i should thanks niao ren for the training she had for me in my ex-company. We had anderson ice-cream over at marina square, after that we went to walk around. Of cos, i am puzzled why my phone never rings nor never received any sms from my friends lah. Haha.. See lah.. My heart had fled there yet still wants to lie to myself that i dun want to go. Saw my friend's gf previous sms le, then i bought a cake from chocoz before going over to find them. Haha.. She told me he had left already. Haha..
I said is ok, i just passed u all the cake then i will go back home. As usual, of cos being polite must called him, telling him i am going there now. See whether he still wants to join us or not. Never tot that, one of my friend who suddenly went missing call me. Asked me where i am, he need someone to talk to. -_-''''' Haha.. As usual lah, he never said anything, i already start to scold him. lol..:P till that he said he called me later. Tmd.. Walked from marina square to suntec to take bus, sian~~ that stupid bus-stop got so many insects.. sob sob.. Ended up i faster board a bus and walk to the place, that i suppose to meet them. Tmd.. dunno is bcos he angry with me or wat, tell me the wrong address.. ARGH~~ then i had to walk back again. when i met up with my friends, i called him and scold him sia~~ wahaha.. :P we bought some stuffs and go back to the room for a small celebration. stupid sia~~ they had been watching soccer but once in a while we changed channel. Saw The Eye, remind me that last time i went to watch a group of people sia~~ He good sia, i asked him to bring a lighter, yet in the end, he brings a lighter that doesn't work at all. Ended up me and my friend's gd had to go down and get it plus we bought some tim sum. Wahaha.. The tim sum not bad sia, i quite like it.. =p The cake got a bit screw up. maybe i too "chu lu le".. But the chocolate is too thick.. plus i got something bitter goes along with me sia~~ wah piang~~ so weird combination.. Hahah.. :P three of us had been playing dai dee till late morning, while my friend's gf already knock out. Win liao, i kept losing. :( drank quite a bit. tmd~~~ kana bully.. there is once i cheat, buahaha.... when he goes toliet, i changed his cards... Haha.. guess he knows lah, but just ignore me. Buahahaha.. He very good hor~~ haha.. too bad~~ pple already taken... haha.. i think towards the end, i started to sa jiao liao~~ haha... cos really starting to get tipsy.. haha... ended up.. all go sleep sia~~ my the other friend accompany me to chat for a while.. ended up all sleep liao~~ 3 piggy leh.. wah lau~~ i still said today morning, i need to go out.. haha.. ended up never sleep.. no lah.. i got sleep for a while, but dunno why i just wake up le. Cannot sleep.. then keep asking them to go eat macdonald breakfast but nobody cares for me. All contiunes to sleep.. :( Actually i had the tots of going off, i wanted to tell them. But.... I dunno why i just couldn't make myself to do that. Then ended up sit there lor~~ watch movies.. sian~~ haha.. he woke up and talk to me for a while, then he knocked out again.. haha.. seriously.. i dunno when this feelings come.. haha.. weird right.. something just goes very wrong ba~~ seriously.. i really thinks i am very xin fu inside the room.. i had this two good friends.. haha.. but maybe guess now i had lose both of them le ba... hahah.. another one is ok.. cos his gf is so friendly.. then of cos lah.. i keep using pillows to beat them.. haha.. next time cannot do it liao~~ later their gfs not happy~~ haha.. seriously.. dunno why.. maybe bcos both of them accompany me during my downtime at work ba~~ suddenly got the bonding with them ba~~ but too bad~~ things won't last long de.. 3 of us said before, hoping each of us will find our the other partner soon. Now 2 of them had found, i am happy for them. Haha.. Not that i am not close either one of them. Is just that my feelings went a bit haywire for the other person. I also don't know when it had bcomes to work in this way. But don't worry, i will make sure it will goes back the correct way to make sure things dun screw up again. Hahaa.. thanx for being there each time for me, hearing my grumbling when i just came back from hongkong. of cos i will never forget wat happened last year, after that day i had changed.. =p thanx for always looking after me.. today is really had bcome a memories that i will cherish it~~ thanx pals~~ guess after today, we will seldom meet up anymore.. i will cut the times that i joined u all. guess now i will try to find tons of excuses to avoid joining u all. but i will miss you all.. :) maybe that is one of the reason that i kept looking u all when u all are sleeping.. hehee.. =p i had an enjoyable night with you all, although is just a simple birthday celebration. Dun worry, i won't have this kind of celebration for my birthday. Guess by then, u all had already forgotten my birthday. And i might be busy with my studies lah. and forgets u all... otherwise later i started to dun bear to let go, how? Stuck with you all often.. Hahaa.. :P i dun want always be a lightbulb in between you all.. Hahaha.. Dun worry for me.. :) At least u all can go for double dates.. :) or think too much le~~ for me, i will let the nature takes the course.. :) haha.. if i got le.. u all dun bully him arh.. or 吓跑他wor.. later no pple wants me, how.. wahaha.. :P

hehe.. 我会很想念你们的。。你们一定要好好的疼爱她们wor.. 不过我相信你们一定会的。。放心我一当把我自己的心情收拾好来，我一定会从新再你们的面前出现的。我就让时间冲淡一切，当时间觉得我应该出现的时候，我就一定会出现的。 :)

Just got my tots sorted

2008-08-19T12:22:00.002+08:00

Haha.. I got my tots sorted.. Maybe the incident tat happened long time ago, left me a deep scare. Of cos, i will not do such a stupid thing~~ haha.. dun ever like yr gd friend.. gd friend shall always remains as gd friend.. haha.. guess nowadays i will seldom online especially when i am at home. Mum's backache is back.. nowadays must act guai.. stay at home to help out some household chores.. Guess maybe is due to that fall she had over in genting.. once in while, it will come back and haunt her.. just brought her to see doctor on last sunday, doctor said is a bit swollen.. avoid most household chores.. of cos i also went to see doctor also.. since i am there already.. spent another $38 sia~~ haha.. doctor said quite bad~~ haha.. took my second dosage of antibotics.. hahaha.. till now i still haven recover.. doubt i will go for my friend's birthday celebration on this coming sat~~ haha.. guess maybe i dun want to make the same mistake that i did last year... secrets.. shall remain as secrets...

失声 Day 4

2008-08-14T12:00:00.002+08:00

Haha.. Enjoy life too much? Doubt it. School going to start in about less than 2 months time. Wohoo!! Is time to make myself busy again~~ Opps.. I wants to have enrich lifestyle, otherwise i am too slack le..

1)I did went to my company dnd. Woohoo.. i love their lucky draw prizes.. hehe.. too bad, i did not participate in the lucky draw, cos i am not entitled to that. Overall i did enjoy myself that nite

2) I went to yy's housewarming. haha.. really a bit like piang my head towards the wall sia~~ haha.. been quite quiet that night ba~~ i went there for a little while, then i went over to find da jie they all at clarke quay.. Haiz~~ da jie lost her diamond at pump room.. :( i tried the calamari there.. BAGUS~~~ VERY NICE~~ the nicest calamari that i ever had sia~~ Miss it so much...

3) Had a small celebration for my shifu, the day after yy's housewarming. Erm.. We went to had dinner at marina square, i had a soupy noodle.. Hehee.. is nice~~ Opps.. i just came back from hongkong not long ago, yet i went to hongkong cafe to eat.. This time round, one of my brothers is there. Haha.. one of my friend said "wow.. two of u bicker a lot sia. " Hahaha.. use to it le lah~~ we always argue de.. haha..

4) Nowadays i had been skipping quite a few outings .. Haha.. dun asked me why.. just feel very tired..

5) haha.. guess i am crazy.. i gt a crush on someone who gt gf.. haha.. hopefully this crush will fade as soon as possible and i will be back to normal.. :P after so long, i had slowly bcome to be so normal.. i dun want it to ruin it again~~ let nature takes it course..

Hong Kong Itinerary

2008-08-05T11:56:00.003+08:00

First Day 17th July
- Reach HongKong Airport at 7 plus pm~~
- Out of HongKong Aiport and take bus A21 to Yau Ma Tei
- Reach Hotel around 9plus pm
- Out of Hotel Room for dinner at Temple Street
- Walk Around Temple Street
- Back Hotel at 12 plus

Second Day 18th July
- Leave Hotel around 10..
- Had breakfast at a nearby shop
- Proceed to DisneyLand
- Back to Hotel around 11 ba~~

Third Day 19th July
- Leave Hotel around 11am~~
- At Dim Sim for breakfast~~
- Wait for my Cousin to cut hair~~
- Around 1 plus, proceed to The Peak..
- Reach Peak around 2pm ba~~
- Come down Peak at 6pm~~
- Proceed to have dinner~~ had a hard time to find the really good restaurant~~ ended up at very good..
- 9plus.. walk along ladies market~~
- Go back to hotel at 12 plus..

Fourth Day 20th July
- 10 plus leave hotel room for macau~
- Reach back hongkong at 12plus midnite~~
- back hotel room around 1am~~

Fifth Day 21th July
- had breakfast~~
- follow by.. my cousin doing rebonding, while i do treatment~~ haha..
- went for a short walk while waiting for my cousin to do hair~
- tried yi shun pudding~~ bought some stuffs at sasa~~
- back to the shop and grab some chocolates~~
- Then back to hotel room.. follow by going to xu liu shan for mango dessert~~
- Jade market for a short stroll
- follow by going to ladies market for a short walk~~

Sixth Day 22th July
- Leave hotel room and buy bread
- go to ta yu shan to visit big buddha~~
- haha.. when i come down, is already time to go back to singapore~~
- i miss tung gate.. didn't manage to go there doing shopping~~ haiz~~

erm~~ i didn't really do a lot of shopping over there~~

guess i need a break~~

2008-07-31T01:48:00.002+08:00

haha.. ever tot of whether after my trip, i bcome very weird.. very quiet? haha.. sometimes i also dunno~~ i feel a bit puzzled and lost~~ just suddenly feel the emptiness~~

i like or love life that is simple but once you realize that everyday is the same, you will start to get bored about it. But sometimes suddenly everything come together, you will feel that everything just turn upside down..

puzzled~~

2008-07-14T00:15:00.002+08:00

hahaa.. seriously, guess i had to pack up my feelings.. hahaa.. guess.. my studies going to start soon.. relationship is just something i should not touch, cos i know i cannot focus or concentrate on two different things at the same time.. haha.. dun mistaken.. not tat i am attached or someone going after me~~ guess i know myself too well.. i haven met the right person yet~~ hehee.. but i am glad.. i got a friend who cares for me so much~~ reached home so late already, still call me ensure that i reached home also~~ haha.. guess u know who u are.. i thinks sometimes when u free or u are online~~ u will kpo on wat i wrote.. hehe.. :P

???

2008-07-03T23:32:00.000+08:00

The True You
You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to be more open with you.With respect to money, you spend whatever you have.You think good luck will definitely be yours, someday.The hidden side of your personality tends to be methodical in your ways - with trouble adapting to the rules of society.You care more about world trends and fashions than you do about well formed opinions.When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you don't have any particular type in mind, but you are inclined to look for someone who will say yes when you ask him / her out.

is it true?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiVxa8_yz8c

OMG~~~

2008-07-02T12:34:00.003+08:00

haiz~~ guess bcos of my job~~ i think i getting aging faster leh~~ guess bcos of my lateness causes me to sleep late at nite.. too kpo sometimes~~ talk too long on phone~~ too hyper at nite.. sob sob... guess i need to do something to keep myself looks better and radiance~~ haiz~~~ i keep telling myself~~i going to attend my gd friend's wedding end of the year wor~~ must looks nice nice... haha.. :P omg~~ hopefully i will do it wor~~

haha.. guess my hk trip, will be a trip for me to go there buy cosmetics.. haha.. time to do something~~ omg~~ when i bcome so ai mei arh~~i tot i am a lazy woman~~ i guess is better to stick to myself to be a lazy woman~~ wahahaaa.... :P

some office updates.. as u know lah~~ i am a contract worker.. most of the times dun have a lot of benefits de lah~~ haha.. my colleagues they all get me a seat for DND.. erm.. question mark right... go or dun go.. if they going, and asked me go.. i sure go de mah~~ who asked me is siao on de.. even my mum also said me~~ pple asked u go.. u sure go.. when u will reject pple de.. can go pasir ris chalet then evening go east coast chalet.. haha.. nowadays dun have so many events le lah~~ sian~~ this month got a lot of bird days~~

Just wants to grumble out~~

2008-06-28T15:11:00.003+08:00

Guess Min has blur blur spend her 23 plus years in singapore and in life.

In kindergarden, she met a few friends.. 4 from her mum's friend sons~~ 1 close kindergarden friend.. Of cos being so mischevious at young age, of cos there are things that she cannot forget. She causes one of her friend to lose a teeth, luckily was so young at that time. One of my mum's son who is always in the same sec as me, also had the same birthday as me wor~~ But now of cos he had grown much more mature than me...

In primary school, being so conincident, me and my kindergarden study the same class throughout the 6 years, not to deny during this period we did quarrel before. Friend or dun friend, this kind of thing.. Later wat lah~~ u like this guy or this guy like u.. all this~~ haha.. first time skip lesson was in my primary school.. So stupid sia, i went to marine parade theatre to watch sammi and ekin move.. feel good 100%~~ haha.. a very simple movie which i like it a lot wor~~~

In secondary school, guess this was the period that i met a lot of new friends. Who let me get into this school, of cos is my grandpa lah~~ During these period of time arh, i took a lot of neoprints sia~~ And i always like to buy sushi from NTUC and go to East Coast to do project with one group of my friends. We always go parkway after school and eat tempura~~ Hahaha.. So simple life~~~ We join choir together, go NDP practice together~~ Before NDP practice, i will buy tons of tibits go there and eat. Cos every week practice, we eat KFC. Wah lau, i also eat until i scare liao..

Lower sec got technical classes ma, but my school so small.. Ended up we had to go to nearby school to study technical classes. Just very conincident, my kindergarden friend study, this was when i met korkor ba~ Being very niang~~~ Hahaha..

Sec 3 onwards, of cos i feel a distant between us due to i am taking a different path with them. I took a class with full of maths, POA, E-Maths, A-Maths.. No choice, i like Maths more than any other subject. But guess my A-Maths results let my teacher feel disappointed ba~~ Even my tuition teacher also LL.. Speechless towards me.. I tends to stick with yy and so called my gd friend and a bunch of big bullies.. haha.. :P And i get closer with korkor during this period of time.. We will study together for o level exams ba~~

After O level exams, i met a guy~~ Haha... We in a very short relationship, so called is my first love ba~~ haha.. A very sweet de love, just that i dunno how to cherish him ba~~ Since i am so young that time, i heard that he is getting married this year le~~ Congras to him~~

Just before i go in to poly, i met another guy~~ Haha.. This time, i stick with him for 3 years~~ Stupid right? Haha.. First time that i admitted to hospital.. So ma lu~~ Jil called me immediately when he saw my msg when i admitted to hospital wor~~ But the problem is, my hp not with me cos i was admitted for observation for 2 hours. Opps.. Jil was not the guy wor.. He is the guy who always hear me cried for 3 years~~ The only movie i watched with both of them was lord of the rings part 2. Part 1 was with someone else.. Hahaa.. Maybe being only child for both me and him, we just want to find someone talk. Just a companion ba, maybe all this while, he treats me like a sister protecting me and accompany me. Just like wat jil and korkor said he never love me before. Being stick with a guy for so long and realise that he don't love you at all. How would you feel? Erm.. Ok lah~~ during this 3 years, i didn't really treat him as someone i love ma~~ Just a very gd friend, is only that i lose him then i realise i had actually fallen into it just that i don't know about it. The first time i felt that i lose him was when i just came back from australia, the first person who i wanted to call when i just alight flight. But he never picked up at all, he switched off his phone. By then i should realise that something is wrong. All my fault, said a lie before i go oversea.. Seriously, i just want to find out how he feels for me all this while but maybe i am wrong. or maybe the email that i send to him when i am in australia is a wrong move. Before boarding, i am so happy, i feel that i am in love, when i came back, u gave me a very cold war~~ Slowly, we getting closer together again. But it just lasted last than a year ba~

In August, my cousin passed away le. I even quarrelled with my poly friends, niao niao, da jie da and ceo.. Haha.. they are my closest friend when i am poly sia~~ i even cried at orchard train station~~ tat was when i am most xiao qi~~ Sometimes after nite class, they will just accompany me~~ xie xie ni meng~~ wo yong yuan duo bu hui wang le na she ri zi~~

When he passed away, was quite a big blow to me~~ Being the youngest daughter in the family, my mum siblings always very dote her~~ My mum told me that korkor said to my auntie, "must take of ah yi they all." tat was when i promise myself.. "korkor, i will take care of all of them.. " Sitting alone in the cafe at airport, taking my panosanic hp with me~~ I was thinking about wat korkor and jil said~~ "Min, he dun like u at all.. Bu yao yue xian yue sheng arh" This sentence keeps floating in my mind. I scare i cannot overcome the sadness if one day he really tells me he found a gf. Then hw to keep my promise.. To take care of them~~ I sent a very werid sms to him~~ He immediately called me back.. Scold me and ask me wat happened, i didn't say anything, just hang up the phone. Maybe that bring another ending between us. He left singapore and went shanghai~ He never tell me when he is going and when he is coming back. I very stubborn hor, why would i like this kind of guy~~ Siao cha bor~~ Before he left , he just sms me this "Gd morning. Min, take good care of yourself." I also dunno why i wake up so early, i called him back~ I know he is at the airport, i can't said anything. I know he is going to board the plane, so wat can i do.. He said, i reached home le then called you, ok? You idiot, i hate you. U let me cried for one month. You don't want to let me know when u come back, means u dun want to contact with me already. Why min still so stupid at that time, don't understand this meaning. He came back le, he told me he like a girl.. I diam diam, there is nothing i can said. From that time onwards, the distance between us getting much more further apart.

I also met someone else.. guess i not convinent to mention who is he again.. i dun want to cause any misunderstanding between he and his gf.. maybe things just come too late, i can't bring myself to it. But thanks for being with me during this period of time.. XXXXX treats me very gd, i so called very shy, i really not used to big crowds. There was a time he brought me to a place to cheer me up when my grandpa passed away. Guess i always bully him~~ But i really wants to thanks him being with me during my down time~~ He brought me to miss clarity cafe.. Tat's when i get more and more close with my sec friends~~ They very pamper me wor~~ Scare i so sad, brought me to ms to eat cake, ended up went to mos.. then i went to eat prata at katong.. and walk back home with my broken heels especially the next day, i got to work.. never know tat i got such close brothers wor and yy..

Two days before my grandpa passed away, i was sick until very jialat, i got two days of mc, ended up i still went to work. Of cos, that day was a very bad day, i cried at work. I don't know is it of wat is going to happen or too stress.. Too noob to handle stress at that period of time? After work, i went to eat steamboat at marina bay, guess that was my last time to go there for steamboat. I broke a chair there sia, so stunned.. The next day, i went to hospital to visit him. He changed a lot. That time i had a very bad cough, therefore considered a bateria spreading, i kept myside outside the ward. Only go in and glance at him once or twice. After that i went to parkway to meet my friends.. Maybe is from then, slowly build up my friendship or bond with another one of my brothers ba~~ Tat time he having some relationship problem.. We had a short chat outside the pool outlet~~ The next day he passed away le.... of cos when i just woke up, i had no feelings at all.. Furthermore, i still sick until very jialat~~How i know wat the hack is happening~~ I went down to my grandma's house~ Of cos every night hiding in my room and cried.. Told myself i had to take care of my father.. Ended up at the last day, was my father looked after me.. On the last day, he was being ceramate.. Before the coffin reached there, my mind was floating about all the past that involves him.. I started to miss him~~ although i know he dislike me.. guess everyone there will thinks i am very fake ba~~ cos all the pple there dun like me at all.. this was the gap that we had build up after my psle ba~ i also dunno why everyone turned to bcome like tat..

guess i like a cried baby spending for my 24 years~~

tat time when i left singapore to bkk.. i never lose anything when i come back...

this time when i left singapore to hk.. will i lose anyone again?

Server Room

2008-06-27T14:21:00.002+08:00

Wahaha.. Seriously in the first few months, i am grumbling why should i quit my previous job. The pay here might not be as high as what i get in the previous job. But during this week, my time had spent very wisely. So called, i got back my life. I no longer work that hard. So called not really that if i stay at my previous job, i will have more time to study. Previous job is not as competitive as the current job. I met a lot of various of people, so called, i am trying to open myself.. (hahaa.. dun mistaken... ) open up myself is to learn more about communicating, dun always think that wat is in the past is good. I should learn to look far, instead of keep standing at the same point again and again. plus overcome my shyness, always keep quiet.. must be much more daring, dun be so timid.. plus dun be so gan chiong~~ must be fast and steady, dun always so slow~~ dun always walk round the circle and circle.. dun always compare the past and the present..watever is in the past, is already in the past, no longer keep comparing, cos it will never be the same again..

haha.. these few days, i been to client side, server room, all these are things that i never get to be involve or do before. Is really a very different way of working style but i always like to keep myself occupied.. As for weekend, i would want to stay at home and rest. Guess my hk trip is making me very tired~~ i got so many errands to do.. sian~~ guess slowly... one by one~~ i got a 100 to 200 of taxi claims for the past months haven claim~~ omg.. my pay already so little le~~ yet so many taxi claim haven claim.. sob sob~~ seriously.. i dunno why... i keep hoping tat my big boss will convert me before i go hongkong~~ but i guess or doubt that he will convert me ba~~ cos i made quite a few mistakes in work~~ but thanks god~~ my tl still not as bad as niao niao~~ he had been very forgiving.. i hopefully next time i can cut down my errors.. dun let him nan zou ren~~ later big boss scold him, i will be very gulity de.. cos most of time is i make mistake~~ erm~~ u know lah~~ i dun like to cause harm to pple de..

Just feeling weird + a messy trip~~

2008-06-23T01:42:00.002+08:00

Seriously nowadays really very lazy to update about my food's photos~~ Hahaa.. Without lying and being very sincere, i started to get use with my work over there but there are still times that i don't really get use. I guess slowly i will get use over there.

As for diet, nowadays i trying to cut down my intake since i seldom exercise. One reason bcos of my gd friend, while another reason mainly is bcos of my own health. I realise my immune system getting more and more weak, as u can see that i often fall sick now and then. Last week, i went out with kl and one of my ex-colleague, of cos i went to sushi tei to eat again. But this time round, i am much more calculative.. Haha.. Kana said by kl.. why so calculative? No choice, now i quite broke~~ haiz~~ money cannot take back~~ now need to save up extra money for my studies plus my hk trip.. haiz~ he so bad~~~ bring me go eat chocolates~~ ARGH~~ but ok lah~~ we ended the day by eating strawberries at foodcourt~~ I LOVE STRAWBERRIES~~

From now till Oct, i had to be much more thrifty and enjoys all my freedom now before my school starts. I finally going to study after saying for 2 years. Seriously i don't know whether i can cope with the stress level that i will be dealing with later on or nt. Will all my brothers be there, lending me a ear or pull me up again when i am down?

As for my xiao qi korkor, i guess he is angry tat i did not agree to be his gurantor ba~ But seriously, i did try my best to save this friendship, guess it really did not ended well. This is the best that i can do, there is nothing much i can do. Recently or start of the year, i lent my friend money. When i am in deep financial trouble, she said she cannot afford to return to me at the moment. Ended up, i had no choice, turned to parents and asked for help. Then they realised that i lent money to friend, kana scolded for that day. But i am sorry to lied, i did not tell them the exact amount that i lend her. So how would they let me go be a gurantor after such incident happens?

As for my two dearest brothers~~ Erm.. Didn't really meet up with one for about 3 weeks le ba~~ While another one, i met him up last weekend ba~~ Had a short chat before we go back~ Sort of started to miss them~~ Omg~~ Why.. haha.. maybe too use to go out with them le~ haha.. so maybe next time they asked me out, i should reject them le hor~~

I am pretty surprised that one of my friend asked us out. But at the same moment, i rejected cos i said i am not free. Brother also rejected by saying he got to study for exams.. Are we avoiding her? Erm.. I dunno leh~~

Erm.. i got a friend sms me on last friday.. i am pretty surprise as both of us had never contacted for more than 4 years? U don't ask me when is the last time that i ever talked to him sia~~ My feelings is right, something goes wrong.. Hahaha.. My feelings won't go back to be the same. I will just treat him as a normal friend. Furthermore he is married already. OMG~~ My head is getting bigger and bigger~~ Erm.. He heard one of my friend's voice when he called me on last friday. And there goes on his story~~ Crazy~~ Each night he called me, he will tends to talk to me very long~ Erm.. nowadays i really don't use to talk on phone that long at nite except towards girls or woman. Opps.. I had bcome lose interest le~~ hahaha..

My trip had turned out to bcome a disaster, seems like all the pressure is coming towards me~~ i feel so sian~~ i rather go trip with my brothers~~ omg~~ but i can't~~ mum will object~~ they will never allow me to do that~~ is either i find a steady friend and join me and my brothers to go.. otherwise i doubt i can go oversea with them~~ or they had to let my mum to join us~~ haha.. since they had let my mum joined us once le~~ haha.. will it have a second time? omg~~

as for my relationship~~ i started to wondering whether is my feelings going haywire again~~ guess i had to put a stop point at the correct time. otherwise if it still contiune to go to the wrong way.. then i will lose a friend in the end again~~ i dun want to land myself in the same position which i encounter a few years back..

Min Min falls sick le

2008-06-06T16:19:00.002+08:00

haiz~~ guess this is the most jialat time till now~~ My fever went up and down, just like roller coaster~~ There was once hit up to 39~~ I super sian~~~ took two days of mc~~ but later going to see doctor again~~ see wat is he going to say~~ cos he only gave me one day of mc~~ but up till now~~ i still feeling very giddy.. stomach very pain~~~ futhermore.. i still contiune having diarrhoea for three days~~ sob sob.. :(
Although my fever have subside, i still feeling very weak~~ :( no appetite.. haiz~~

Part and Parcels of Life?

2008-05-28T13:01:00.002+08:00

Hahaa.. Seriously, are u looking to be in a relationship and enjoy the pamper from your the other half? or are u enjoying yr current life?

hahaa.. who dun want someone to care abt you.. who dun want someone to look after you.. i believe most women are more sensitive towards things.. and "zou nan ren hou mian de nu ren.."

seriously~~ in life, one might encounter more than one relationship.. not every relationship ended with a happy ending nor a sad ending ...

I known a truth life story.. A couple had been together for 7 years, ended up they broke up. But the gal was running away, she do not wants to hear any news from the guy. Why? To me, bcos the gal can't get the guy out of her mind but she knows that separating will be better for both parties. Since there is a gap between the gal and the guy. Whether is there any third-parties had come in, it does not seems to be a problem anymore. Since the love had faded to become a habit.. In a relationship, don't ever let "love" or "passion" to fade it and bcome a habit.. There are times that you can change your habit and addicted to another habit.. While if love is there, it will be lasting instead of fading away..

Am i right? Seriously i also dunno, it is just based on my kpo comments.. If i am right, why can't i find something that is right? Had i really let go of the past? I did not let go of the past, it just bcome my memories. The more u wants to let go of something, the harder it is. Why not try to accept the facts, instead of running away? Running away does not helps at all, it will just make matters worst. Seriously i did enjoy my life at the moment.. Wo shi yi ge heng rou yi zi zhu de nu ren~~ Ou er ge wo yi ge guan hua~~ wo jiu yi jing gou le~~~

i met a friend on sunday~~ maybe after my complaint too much~~ he told me "If u really need money, i can lend u first." Hahaa.. seriously at that point of moment, i really very touch.. It had been a long time that someone ever told me that.. haha.. Min.. u still consider quite fortunate.. u had met quite a lot of gd friends in life.. but friendship will still fades away de~~~ in this world, as long as, there is relationship in it... they will always tend to fade away.. hw can u maintain friendship or relationship like a bottle of wine.. the longer it is, the better it is.. i guess i haven't reach that level yet.. i hope i can reach but i doubt it...

is just part and parcels of life.. the older u grow, the more things will fade away.. therefore, i rather be silly, childish in front of friends... i just wants to stay in that moment.. cos it is always a joy to remain part of yourself as a child~~ in a working society, u had to be tuff fighter. Why still wants to wear the mask after work? Isn't that makes life bcome more sian and more tiring..

Is Life really that Fragile

2008-05-27T23:43:00.002+08:00

Is life really tat fragile?? When things want to come, you really cannot runaway? Seriously, i dunno when Min will down again or she had overcome it.. We shall see.. Shall let time prove whether i am right or i am wrong..

I am Broke for the next few months..

2008-05-25T16:11:00.002+08:00

Hahaha.. It had been a long long time tat i ever had this kind of taste, thinking of omg~~ hw am i going to suffer thru.. But now this kind of taste is back.. ARGH~~ Seriously i really hate it but i had to accept it for the next one year or more..

Last friday, i had fork out my money to pay my school fees for the first semester. Erm.. Min arh~~ just one module leh, how broke can you be~~ But if the following things going to occur for the next few months.. Then guess i know why am i going to broke~~

June :
- Cousin's birthday
- Owe my cousins they all a treat..

July :
- Time for a trip
- 2 birthdays

August :
Birthday Day month
-3 sec friends
-1 poly friend
-Nanny.. haha..
-2 ex-colleagues..

September :
- 2 birthdays
- a trip to KL before my school starts?

October :
- My birthday.. Yipeee
- 2 birthdays..
- School starts.. sob sob.. transportation allowance going to increase le~
- 1 wedding..

November :
- Time to think hw am i going to pay my school fees..
- 2 weddings..

~~ omg~~ i just dun feel like continue.. haiz~~

Relaxing Weekend

2008-05-11T23:07:00.002+08:00

This weekend considered as most guai weekend for me. Didn't really went anywhere except going for facial today morning. Opps... Is so painful~~ haiz~~~ no choice~~ face very dirty.. haiz~~ guess i should go facial often.

Erm~~ Last friday, i met my friends for dinner plus movies~~ haha.. Actually wanted to try hanabi at vivocity but is 50 plus per person. -_-''' Four of us.. hahaa.. Didi was so quiet that day.. really stunned me~~ In the end, we went to dragongate at harbour for dinner.. lol.. :P one person is ard 35. We ordered 23 dishes out of the 54 dishes. Seriously, i didn't eat a lot.. Most likely is try one piece from each plate, therefore during movie, i still can have my haagen daz ice-cream.. i went to watch jin ge that movie.. haha... who is jin ge? jin cheng wu lor~~ hahaha... quite touching sia~~ i doubt that didi knows that i cried during the movie~~ hahaa.. :P i like the song so much~~

korkor... these few days u been calling ard 2, 3, 4 plus.. haha.. i never pick up~~ i sleep le lah.. u wants to make appointment with me to make up a date to redeem my ice-cream.. :P hahaa.. or accompany me go airport for dinner.. :P i feel like going to changi airport.. dunno why.. is it time for de-stress.. haha.. :P

Beautiful Sunset

2008-05-08T00:41:00.002+08:00

haiz~~ Am i being too shy?

2008-05-06T00:04:00.002+08:00

Erm~~ I can't deny my colleagues they all really treat me very good and nice~ They will look after me. Always ask me to join them for lunch, bring me go eat nice food. One of my colleagues going off tomorrow. Before she left, she passed me her pooh bears~~ she said when i saw that, i will think of her~~ seriously, i very touched~~~ i almost wanted to drop my first tears in the new compant~~ but i hold on to it.. haiz~~ guess later, it will be a sad moment~ cos everyone was sad that she is going to leave us and join another company...

haiz~~ am i being too shy~~ seriously, i think i need some reflection on myself. When i am not close to someone, i dunno how to interact with them~ haiz~~ i hopefully i will learn more on socalising skills and get a much more closer bond with them~ dun want them to mistaken that i am acting dao or wat. just that i dunno wat to say.

Last wk, i had a very tiring week.

Monday and tuesday, i went back home after work~ Sad sia, bank no money~~ sob sob~~

Wed, i went out with my colleagues to have farewell dinner cum KTV.. plus macdonald. Trying to control my diet, even my colleague asked me to eat nugget, i also decline~~ haha.. early in the morning eat nuggets.. haha.. let me recalled wat i had over in iras tat time. i also had a 12 hours outing but this time round is a bit special, i left ard 3plus. I had already had a date with my trekking kakis that to join them to go kent ridge the next day. Therefore, they let me go.. hahaha.. :P

Thur, Although i am very tired, i pull myself to wake up at 12 to join them. As usual, i am late and did not had my lunch with them. Hahaha.. When lao dao saw me, first sentence "Are you ok? You look quite pale." Omg~~ i really looks that bad~~ haiz~~ i faster brushed away and go to buy drinks~ Ended everyone also knows i slept at 5 plus, tat's why i looks so tired. We went to watch sunset, i can only use one word to describe "Beautiful". I never knew that sunset is that beautiful.

Friday, i met up with my ex-colleagues and went down to register. Haha.. Four of us going to study together. After being persuade by so many pple, i finally make my first step. We shall see how things going to be like. I wondering, will i give up halfway?

Sat, i am so tired that i slept until 4 plus then wake up~ so jialat right? haha.. I went to catch ironman, bcos i am late again. We got the first row seats. Erm~~ really very cold.. I almost freeze to death.. I think the show is consider not bad, making use of the high technology stuffs. Of cos, my friend love it more than we do. Hahah.. had a short chat at iguana... Some stuffs that cannot avoid means really cannot avoid... After iguana, we went mac~ Haha.. Papa very look after me.. knows that i going to attend my gd friend's wedding.. they will always remind me~~ nov wor~~ nov wor~~ stress~~~ -_-''' Am i going to determine to do it? haha.. We shall see.. :X

Sun.. I met up some friends for lunch at wisma food court, we tried the korean food over there. Hehehe.. :P i think next time i will order soba~~ that looks nice~~ haha.. thanks for helping me.. :P
I had my dinner at IMM~~ hahaha.. Hk cafe.. not bad~~ quite nice~~ jiejie actually wanted to treat me bcos she knows i am damn broke now~~ but i insisted dun want lah~~ haiz~~ guess this week, i going to eat bread le~~