Just wants to grumble out~~

Guess Min has blur blur spend her 23 plus years in singapore and in life.

In kindergarden, she met a few friends.. 4 from her mum's friend sons~~ 1 close kindergarden friend.. Of cos being so mischevious at young age, of cos there are things that she cannot forget. She causes one of her friend to lose a teeth, luckily was so young at that time. One of my mum's son who is always in the same sec as me, also had the same birthday as me wor~~ But now of cos he had grown much more mature than me...

In primary school, being so conincident, me and my kindergarden study the same class throughout the 6 years, not to deny during this period we did quarrel before. Friend or dun friend, this kind of thing.. Later wat lah~~ u like this guy or this guy like u.. all this~~ haha.. first time skip lesson was in my primary school.. So stupid sia, i went to marine parade theatre to watch sammi and ekin move.. feel good 100%~~ haha.. a very simple movie which i like it a lot wor~~~

In secondary school, guess this was the period that i met a lot of new friends. Who let me get into this school, of cos is my grandpa lah~~ During these period of time arh, i took a lot of neoprints sia~~ And i always like to buy sushi from NTUC and go to East Coast to do project with one group of my friends. We always go parkway after school and eat tempura~~ Hahaha.. So simple life~~~ We join choir together, go NDP practice together~~ Before NDP practice, i will buy tons of tibits go there and eat. Cos every week practice, we eat KFC. Wah lau, i also eat until i scare liao..

Lower sec got technical classes ma, but my school so small.. Ended up we had to go to nearby school to study technical classes. Just very conincident, my kindergarden friend study, this was when i met korkor ba~ Being very niang~~~ Hahaha..

Sec 3 onwards, of cos i feel a distant between us due to i am taking a different path with them. I took a class with full of maths, POA, E-Maths, A-Maths.. No choice, i like Maths more than any other subject. But guess my A-Maths results let my teacher feel disappointed ba~~ Even my tuition teacher also LL.. Speechless towards me.. I tends to stick with yy and so called my gd friend and a bunch of big bullies.. haha.. :P And i get closer with korkor during this period of time.. We will study together for o level exams ba~~

After O level exams, i met a guy~~ Haha... We in a very short relationship, so called is my first love ba~~ haha.. A very sweet de love, just that i dunno how to cherish him ba~~ Since i am so young that time, i heard that he is getting married this year le~~ Congras to him~~

Just before i go in to poly, i met another guy~~ Haha.. This time, i stick with him for 3 years~~ Stupid right? Haha.. First time that i admitted to hospital.. So ma lu~~ Jil called me immediately when he saw my msg when i admitted to hospital wor~~ But the problem is, my hp not with me cos i was admitted for observation for 2 hours. Opps.. Jil was not the guy wor.. He is the guy who always hear me cried for 3 years~~ The only movie i watched with both of them was lord of the rings part 2. Part 1 was with someone else.. Hahaa.. Maybe being only child for both me and him, we just want to find someone talk. Just a companion ba, maybe all this while, he treats me like a sister protecting me and accompany me. Just like wat jil and korkor said he never love me before. Being stick with a guy for so long and realise that he don't love you at all. How would you feel? Erm.. Ok lah~~ during this 3 years, i didn't really treat him as someone i love ma~~ Just a very gd friend, is only that i lose him then i realise i had actually fallen into it just that i don't know about it. The first time i felt that i lose him was when i just came back from australia, the first person who i wanted to call when i just alight flight. But he never picked up at all, he switched off his phone. By then i should realise that something is wrong. All my fault, said a lie before i go oversea.. Seriously, i just want to find out how he feels for me all this while but maybe i am wrong. or maybe the email that i send to him when i am in australia is a wrong move. Before boarding, i am so happy, i feel that i am in love, when i came back, u gave me a very cold war~~ Slowly, we getting closer together again. But it just lasted last than a year ba~

In August, my cousin passed away le. I even quarrelled with my poly friends, niao niao, da jie da and ceo.. Haha.. they are my closest friend when i am poly sia~~ i even cried at orchard train station~~ tat was when i am most xiao qi~~ Sometimes after nite class, they will just accompany me~~ xie xie ni meng~~ wo yong yuan duo bu hui wang le na she ri zi~~

When he passed away, was quite a big blow to me~~ Being the youngest daughter in the family, my mum siblings always very dote her~~ My mum told me that korkor said to my auntie, "must take of ah yi they all." tat was when i promise myself.. "korkor, i will take care of all of them.. " Sitting alone in the cafe at airport, taking my panosanic hp with me~~ I was thinking about wat korkor and jil said~~ "Min, he dun like u at all.. Bu yao yue xian yue sheng arh" This sentence keeps floating in my mind. I scare i cannot overcome the sadness if one day he really tells me he found a gf. Then hw to keep my promise.. To take care of them~~ I sent a very werid sms to him~~ He immediately called me back.. Scold me and ask me wat happened, i didn't say anything, just hang up the phone. Maybe that bring another ending between us. He left singapore and went shanghai~ He never tell me when he is going and when he is coming back. I very stubborn hor, why would i like this kind of guy~~ Siao cha bor~~ Before he left , he just sms me this "Gd morning. Min, take good care of yourself." I also dunno why i wake up so early, i called him back~ I know he is at the airport, i can't said anything. I know he is going to board the plane, so wat can i do.. He said, i reached home le then called you, ok? You idiot, i hate you. U let me cried for one month. You don't want to let me know when u come back, means u dun want to contact with me already. Why min still so stupid at that time, don't understand this meaning. He came back le, he told me he like a girl.. I diam diam, there is nothing i can said. From that time onwards, the distance between us getting much more further apart.

I also met someone else.. guess i not convinent to mention who is he again.. i dun want to cause any misunderstanding between he and his gf.. maybe things just come too late, i can't bring myself to it. But thanks for being with me during this period of time.. XXXXX treats me very gd, i so called very shy, i really not used to big crowds. There was a time he brought me to a place to cheer me up when my grandpa passed away. Guess i always bully him~~ But i really wants to thanks him being with me during my down time~~ He brought me to miss clarity cafe.. Tat's when i get more and more close with my sec friends~~ They very pamper me wor~~ Scare i so sad, brought me to ms to eat cake, ended up went to mos.. then i went to eat prata at katong.. and walk back home with my broken heels especially the next day, i got to work.. never know tat i got such close brothers wor and yy..

Two days before my grandpa passed away, i was sick until very jialat, i got two days of mc, ended up i still went to work. Of cos, that day was a very bad day, i cried at work. I don't know is it of wat is going to happen or too stress.. Too noob to handle stress at that period of time? After work, i went to eat steamboat at marina bay, guess that was my last time to go there for steamboat. I broke a chair there sia, so stunned.. The next day, i went to hospital to visit him. He changed a lot. That time i had a very bad cough, therefore considered a bateria spreading, i kept myside outside the ward. Only go in and glance at him once or twice. After that i went to parkway to meet my friends.. Maybe is from then, slowly build up my friendship or bond with another one of my brothers ba~~ Tat time he having some relationship problem.. We had a short chat outside the pool outlet~~ The next day he passed away le.... of cos when i just woke up, i had no feelings at all.. Furthermore, i still sick until very jialat~~How i know wat the hack is happening~~ I went down to my grandma's house~ Of cos every night hiding in my room and cried.. Told myself i had to take care of my father.. Ended up at the last day, was my father looked after me.. On the last day, he was being ceramate.. Before the coffin reached there, my mind was floating about all the past that involves him.. I started to miss him~~ although i know he dislike me.. guess everyone there will thinks i am very fake ba~~ cos all the pple there dun like me at all.. this was the gap that we had build up after my psle ba~ i also dunno why everyone turned to bcome like tat..

guess i like a cried baby spending for my 24 years~~

tat time when i left singapore to bkk.. i never lose anything when i come back...

this time when i left singapore to hk.. will i lose anyone again?

Server Room

Wahaha.. Seriously in the first few months, i am grumbling why should i quit my previous job. The pay here might not be as high as what i get in the previous job. But during this week, my time had spent very wisely. So called, i got back my life. I no longer work that hard. So called not really that if i stay at my previous job, i will have more time to study. Previous job is not as competitive as the current job. I met a lot of various of people, so called, i am trying to open myself.. (hahaa.. dun mistaken... ) open up myself is to learn more about communicating, dun always think that wat is in the past is good. I should learn to look far, instead of keep standing at the same point again and again. plus overcome my shyness, always keep quiet.. must be much more daring, dun be so timid.. plus dun be so gan chiong~~ must be fast and steady, dun always so slow~~ dun always walk round the circle and circle.. dun always compare the past and the present..watever is in the past, is already in the past, no longer keep comparing, cos it will never be the same again..

haha.. these few days, i been to client side, server room, all these are things that i never get to be involve or do before. Is really a very different way of working style but i always like to keep myself occupied.. As for weekend, i would want to stay at home and rest. Guess my hk trip is making me very tired~~ i got so many errands to do.. sian~~ guess slowly... one by one~~ i got a 100 to 200 of taxi claims for the past months haven claim~~ omg.. my pay already so little le~~ yet so many taxi claim haven claim.. sob sob~~ seriously.. i dunno why... i keep hoping tat my big boss will convert me before i go hongkong~~ but i guess or doubt that he will convert me ba~~ cos i made quite a few mistakes in work~~ but thanks god~~ my tl still not as bad as niao niao~~ he had been very forgiving.. i hopefully next time i can cut down my errors.. dun let him nan zou ren~~ later big boss scold him, i will be very gulity de.. cos most of time is i make mistake~~ erm~~ u know lah~~ i dun like to cause harm to pple de..

Just feeling weird + a messy trip~~

Seriously nowadays really very lazy to update about my food's photos~~ Hahaa.. Without lying and being very sincere, i started to get use with my work over there but there are still times that i don't really get use. I guess slowly i will get use over there.

As for diet, nowadays i trying to cut down my intake since i seldom exercise. One reason bcos of my gd friend, while another reason mainly is bcos of my own health. I realise my immune system getting more and more weak, as u can see that i often fall sick now and then. Last week, i went out with kl and one of my ex-colleague, of cos i went to sushi tei to eat again. But this time round, i am much more calculative.. Haha.. Kana said by kl.. why so calculative? No choice, now i quite broke~~ haiz~~ money cannot take back~~ now need to save up extra money for my studies plus my hk trip.. haiz~ he so bad~~~ bring me go eat chocolates~~ ARGH~~ but ok lah~~ we ended the day by eating strawberries at foodcourt~~ I LOVE STRAWBERRIES~~

From now till Oct, i had to be much more thrifty and enjoys all my freedom now before my school starts. I finally going to study after saying for 2 years. Seriously i don't know whether i can cope with the stress level that i will be dealing with later on or nt. Will all my brothers be there, lending me a ear or pull me up again when i am down?

As for my xiao qi korkor, i guess he is angry tat i did not agree to be his gurantor ba~ But seriously, i did try my best to save this friendship, guess it really did not ended well. This is the best that i can do, there is nothing much i can do. Recently or start of the year, i lent my friend money. When i am in deep financial trouble, she said she cannot afford to return to me at the moment. Ended up, i had no choice, turned to parents and asked for help. Then they realised that i lent money to friend, kana scolded for that day. But i am sorry to lied, i did not tell them the exact amount that i lend her. So how would they let me go be a gurantor after such incident happens?

As for my two dearest brothers~~ Erm.. Didn't really meet up with one for about 3 weeks le ba~~ While another one, i met him up last weekend ba~~ Had a short chat before we go back~ Sort of started to miss them~~ Omg~~ Why.. haha.. maybe too use to go out with them le~ haha.. so maybe next time they asked me out, i should reject them le hor~~

I am pretty surprised that one of my friend asked us out. But at the same moment, i rejected cos i said i am not free. Brother also rejected by saying he got to study for exams.. Are we avoiding her? Erm.. I dunno leh~~

Erm.. i got a friend sms me on last friday.. i am pretty surprise as both of us had never contacted for more than 4 years? U don't ask me when is the last time that i ever talked to him sia~~ My feelings is right, something goes wrong.. Hahaha.. My feelings won't go back to be the same. I will just treat him as a normal friend. Furthermore he is married already. OMG~~ My head is getting bigger and bigger~~ Erm.. He heard one of my friend's voice when he called me on last friday. And there goes on his story~~ Crazy~~ Each night he called me, he will tends to talk to me very long~ Erm.. nowadays i really don't use to talk on phone that long at nite except towards girls or woman. Opps.. I had bcome lose interest le~~ hahaha..

My trip had turned out to bcome a disaster, seems like all the pressure is coming towards me~~ i feel so sian~~ i rather go trip with my brothers~~ omg~~ but i can't~~ mum will object~~ they will never allow me to do that~~ is either i find a steady friend and join me and my brothers to go.. otherwise i doubt i can go oversea with them~~ or they had to let my mum to join us~~ haha.. since they had let my mum joined us once le~~ haha.. will it have a second time? omg~~

as for my relationship~~ i started to wondering whether is my feelings going haywire again~~ guess i had to put a stop point at the correct time. otherwise if it still contiune to go to the wrong way.. then i will lose a friend in the end again~~ i dun want to land myself in the same position which i encounter a few years back..

Min Min falls sick le

haiz~~ guess this is the most jialat time till now~~ My fever went up and down, just like roller coaster~~ There was once hit up to 39~~ I super sian~~~ took two days of mc~~ but later going to see doctor again~~ see wat is he going to say~~ cos he only gave me one day of mc~~ but up till now~~ i still feeling very giddy.. stomach very pain~~~ futhermore.. i still contiune having diarrhoea for three days~~ sob sob.. :(
Although my fever have subside, i still feeling very weak~~ :( no appetite.. haiz~~