last saturday been to airport to fetch my aunt n my cousin... my friend tot i went to fetch my guy friend.. haha.. i also lazy to further explain.. these few days always been thinking wanted to go and visit kokor.. but thinking back tat is still angry.. make me step back... always tot that he is the one who understand me the most.. but maybe now no longer... from the moment i stepped out of his ward... he sms me the next day... telling me... u had lose me already... maybe i really very stupid ba.. changing bed before going to operation room can stand there to wait mah.. but there got so many pple liao... furthermore nobody i know.. plus... i am so afarid of hospital... i can plucked out my courage and go up alone and search for the ward and bed already not bad... the fear of hospital is really cannot be describe... i really very scare... if i am not scare.. i won't die die also dun want to go see doctor tat day... my back was so painful.... tian tian so scare.. haha.. cos i keep crying non-stop.... the moment i decided to go see doctor is when i called up yiying.. she told me... nth wrong... jus sprain of back... dun need to stay or send to hospital.. then just got relieve and go see doctor... kor... wanted to explain to u.. but u dun want to listen.. i also diam diam liao.. i really fear of hospital... if can... i won't want to step into it... if someone accompany me.. i really dun mind.. u asked me stayed there for how long... i also won't says a no... just like last time... siok entered hospital... xiaowei.. .accompany me go there and we spent almost one whole day there... but u asked me go alone... i will not stayed for long.. cos i scare.. u can scold me timid or watever u want... but the truth is i really cannot stand to go hospital alone... not tat u not impt to me or i dun care for u.. is really.. u cannot ask me go alone... u been taking care of me... i do care for u all but jus duno how to express out mah...

back to airport ba.. before aunt come out... my uncle thinking abt my cousin... the moment is sad... nobody will expect this to happen.... everyone is still sad but nobody want to express it out.. in less than a year so many things happened... there is pple getting marry... there is pple die... this is unavoidable.. no fear.. i promise myself... i will be strong enuff to take care of everyone... from a immature kid need to grow up suddenly to be very mature.. is very hard.. .but i will try my best..