I AM STUPID!!!!!

ARGH!!!! i think i am stupid.. and is nt stupid only.. IS EXTREMELY STUPID!!! haiz!!!!

i am slow and stupid.. haiz~~~

我老板快要给我气死了！！！我觉得我笨到一种无可救药的地步！！！ 做事经常放错，我好气自己啊！

黄小姐，不要一直做个糊涂虫，你已经24岁了！！ 还那么没有用！！！ 真是一个蠢才！！！

i start to wondering, can i really survive in this private sector world? do i suits to contiune to work here? haiz~~~ i doubt i can cope to with the fast pace in my work.. haiz~~ between work and studies can i really cope it? my studies went chaos.. now my work also went chaos.. haiz~~ guess my life is in a mess now~~~

so should i consider that i dun have a bf now? otherwise maybe my relationship will went chaos too? or maybe he can hear me complain~~~

haiz~~ guess maybe this weekend should be a clubbing week or drinking week..

double combo.. can i take it?

ARGH!!!!!

haiz~~ dunno is my communication skills got problem or... haiz~~ sian sian~~ starting to feel that my work topple.. :( ARGH~~~ not happy not happy nt happy!!! things just dun go the way, i wants.. so MESSY!!! haiz~ a bit back like wat was happening in my ex-company.. can i handle it this time round with a better attitude.. hahaa.. we shall see.. guess i will just simply bo chap it.. cos the communication in between is like break down lor~~~ KAOZ!!! nobody seems like knows wat is the correct way and method.. communication break down across sia~~~
one wants this.. one wants that.. end up.. wat i do.. is wrong.. -_-'''' i just follow requirements de mah.. haiz~~ if u all know the requirements are wrong hor~~ why didn't said it out in the first place.. now then kp that is wrong.. haiz~~~ i very sian leh.. sob sob.. wants to proves that i am not so incapable.. ended up.. it can only show one thing.. i am getting more and more incapable.. and STUPID!!!!! haiz~~~

Had been very busy recently~~

Hahaa... i overslept on my gd friend's wedding. Hopefully tat day, 我不时很失态吧！！我好像说错话了。 yy, you are so pretty that day.. hehee.. 我会加油的， 赢到我的台湾机票！！看齐来我已经决定我明年要去台湾了。。 会去的成功吗? 明年就有答案了。

haha.. during that week, i was on two days of mc and one day of leave. No choice, i had to go back to work on sunday when she was having her dinner.. :X I rushed to parkway to get a birthday gift for her which i saw it a few days ago.. hahaa.. :P should had bought it earilier hor.. otherwise i won't be that late.. Hahaha.. guess i looks a bit weird that nite.. looks like a kiddy sia~~ haha..

after tat week.. wat did i do arh.. erm.. let me think.. i cannot recall of anyting~~~ orh~~ i went to changi airport to do my assignment after my lesson. when i reached home is ard 9plus am~~ super shag hor~~ take a nap le.. then my uncle came over to my house and said something happened to my auntie~~ haiZ~~~ i..................... at nite, i went to meet up with my poly friends.. lol.. had my dinner at waraku pasta.. once a while gathering.. still consider not bad ba~~ as when u gets old, everyone started to have their different life, is hard to have a gathering session. haiz~~ sob sob.. seems like i am eagerly to find one now~~ haha.. i also dunno... maybe just like my korkor said de.. i too long never been in love le.. i had lose the way how to love someone le.. or so called i dunno how to cherish pple. guess is still better to stay low profile.. once in a while, i got friends asked me out can le~~~ hear me su ku.. complain can le~~ dun need always i entertain them.. haha.. :P
Sunday, i met my brothers.. haha.. my friend called me out, i asked her to join us together.. hehee.. after we bought the tickets hor~~ brother said he is going to treat me.. :P so nice of him~~ treat me eat... wahahaa.. i stole his phone.. still got free meals.. not bad hor... hahaa.. :P my brothers arh.. they are like that de.. treat me like a male de.. haiz~~ of cos i kept quiet to my friend that he actually treating me~~ otherwise very weird leh~~~

last wk... was a wk of chionging assignment.. chiong until like mad woman.. skips lunch, no lunching outside.. stay in office.. everyday sleeps 3-5 hours.. sob sob.. complexion getting worst.. haiz~~ luckily nowadays never met up with korkor.. otherwise he sure kp abt me.. he sure said u sure nobody wants le.. hahaaha.. i know this is the truth le.. :X 我应经看开了`。。。 lol.. :P

My friend got her bonus le~~ haha.. she treats me kushinbo.. hehee.. i kept quiet in front of another friend also.. paiseh~~~ go eat together mah.. after tat we went to watch Madagascar.. then i took a bus home.. hahaa.. my another gd friend asked me to go clubbing.. i super shag le~~ where got energy to go clubbing.. in the end, i miss a chance to meet up with a yandao.. sob sob.. :'( based on wat she said arh.. tat guy very yandao leh.. cos she seldom will said guys yandao de.. hahaa.. she is a chio bu wor~~ of cos her taste for guys is higher..

Sunday, i went to loreal fair.. haha.. bought some stuffs.. of cos 大少爷complain that i am always late.. Ask me to learn punctuality.. sob sob.. :( dun he knows bcos of late.. i lose someone.. hahaha.. but everything over le.. no point to mention it again le...

Assignment + Gd Friend's Wedding

Haahhaa.. Recently i am being tied down by my assignment and gd friend's wedding.. As u can know.. i thinks i belong to a person who likes to enjoy going out often.. hahaha... my parents used to say,"why last time we never tied your legs when u are still a baby?" Guess now is too late.. Hahaahaa.. I paid 1k plus for the first module yet my first assignment still remain untouch. This reminds me about the times when i was in poly. Hahaha.. In poly, always got kw aka my shifu helped me a lot~~ OF cos still got my buddies in poly lah.. hahaa.. the four of us are famous for last minute. Last minute study until next day morning then go school take exams.. Hahahaa.. but now, 1 bcome career woman, another 1 bcomes xin fu de nu ren, while ceo remains uncontactable.. hahaa.. while as for me.. still remains kiddy like last time.. hahaa.. guess each time they talked to me also wants to puke blood.

Hahahaa.. seriously, i guess i belong to the type very emotional ba~~ erm... seriously my colleagues treat me quite good ba~~ they knows that i am currently studying.. on the first day, they will offer me cakes and yougurt drink, to encourage me to school.. hahaa.. now assignment is going to hand up soon le, they asking me whether i need any help or not. She will help me.. hahaa.. seriously, everyone bcomes more mature than wat i know.. yet i am still as kiddy as i am... hahaa.. is it time to find someone to look after me.. haha.. but is quite hard, currently i dun have anyone in mind nor anyone going after me.. haha... time to concentrate on my studies ba~~ hopefully i can find one before i graduate.. hahaa.. hopefully he can go aus with me to celebrate the joy with me that i had graduate after struggling for my studies. i dun mind to be lightbulb for 1 year but not longer ba~~ haha.. lao tian ye arh~~~ bu yao zhe yang mah.. lol.. :P wo tu ran jian hao xiang bei ai de gang jue~~~ lol.. :P guess wo hai shi dang ge xiao nu ren hao ba~~~

hahaa.. ytd i met my gd friend with a gal.. haha.. surprisingly, i dun have that kind of the feelings.. hahahaa.. no feelings at all lor~~ later when i am at tampines, i met my classmates.. then when i go cineleisure to meet my friends, i met my ex-colleagues... hahaa.. within one day, i met 3 persons sia~~~ hw come arh..

ahhahahaahaa..

5 more days to assignment date due.. i wondering can i finish before it or i had to take mc or leave le.

1 more wk to yy's wedding le~~ time passes super fast, i knew her for more than 10 years.. now she is getting married le~~ while i still remain single.. hahaa... wo xi wang ta xin fu..

to me, i think when u reached wedding stage, is another phrase in life, in this phrase, there are different things/stuffs to learn :
- hw to live in harmony with your husband's family
- hw to cook
- hw to keep the love between both of u keep burning till u all are old..
- hw to etc.................

Hehehe.. :P

Next year holiday trip

hahaa...Fix destination for next year will be Taiwan.. hahahaa.. I had a bet with brother.. lol.. :P if i manage to slim down by next year.. one free air ticket to taiwan.. lol.. :P

i had another agreement with niao niao wor~~ if we both manage to shed away extra fats.. next year, we will all go taiwan to celebrate my next year birthday.. :P

hahaha.. i must determine to do it.. :P

Min.. JIA YOU!! cannot lose this bet wor~~

Birthday Celebration

hahaa.. i had a very very very tired birthday celebration..

guess i wondering izzit bcos i am so stress up with studies and work.. tat's why i dun enjoy it.. hahaha.. i also dunno.. or bcos there aren't any surprises?

I starts my birthday celebration on friday nite.. after my lesson, i went to vivocity to meet niao niao.. haha.. she very poor thing leh.. waiting for us till late nite.. luckily got her colleague accompany her, otherwise she will curse and swear at us. lol.. :P we had our dinner at terra cafe while waiting for da jie to join us.. hehe.. da jie joined us at 11plus then we headed down to clarke quay. sad to said, most of the pubs that we wants to go, all were quite packed. Actually i wanted to go pump room, too bad, too crowded. So we went back to iguana, same place as last year. :) so sweet hor, da jie they all always accompanied me to celebrate my birthday. haha.. guess they knows i dun have a lot of friends.. :P As usual kiddo haven grown up, haiz~~ Among three of us, although i am not the youngest yet i am the most kiddo de. 1 years older le, yet i still haven grown up. sian~ hope next year, i still can have my birthday celebration with da jie they all, and this time i will be much more mature. Guess da jie that day was deadbeat, she worked until 11plus. Then still need to entertain me till 1 plus.. hehe.. :P da jie and niao niao so wei da.. lol.. :P

Sat, went to school for lesson. Sob sob.. :( no mood sia~~ haiz~~ tired plus sian~~ no choice lah.. pay school fees le, still can dun want to go meh? plus i study to get a degree, in order i can support my parents next time. haiz~ can give up meh? dun study , cannot get a good pay, then next time how can i support them? After school, got a call from kelvin... lol.. :P end of up quarreling bcos of timing for bbq.. too busy le lah~~

Meet Edmund for dinner before he fled back to aus. Haha.. although he came back for four days hor~~ he still meets me for dinner.. hehe.. so good.. :P sweet sia~~ lol.. i knows him for too long le.. :P

After dinner.. meet kelvin they all to look at the bbq food.. haha.. when he first met me, face super black lor~ haha.. :P ended up.. we went to have dinner at food court, followed by sashimi.. yummy.. my favourite sashimi swordfish.. :P, and dessert at swensen.. haha..

Ard 11plus, i went back home to change.. haha.. I went st james with my friends plus my brothers they all.. lol... :P so ke lian~~ they need to entertain me till 3 plus.. haha.. furthermore my friend's bf need to work at 8am the next day.. lol.. :P

I slept ard 5plus lor~~ sob sob.. :(

erm.. early in the morning, kelvin called me to go downstair and pick up food.. haiz~~ not enuff sleep sia~~

haiz~~ i also dunno leh.. dun really happy during the bbq.. i also dunno..

is bcos i am too tired? or bcos i am too sian ? or ?????

on the way back, i kept very quiet wor~~ haha.. brother very sweet.. he called me when he received my msg.. i told him i wasn't happy for this year birthday~~ he called to concern for me.. haha.. after hand up the phone.. i wanted to sms him to tell him.. haha.. dun let me rely on u.. but ended up, i never send.. :X

SO tired.. now need to chiong for assignment.. hopefully both of them will support me till the end.. :P

hahaa.. my colleague also very sweet.. hehe.. she said if i got any problems for my assignment.. i can ask her.. she will be guiding me.. hehee.. :P

Tired

Haiz~~
nowadays very busy.. got a lot of things to be handle.. haiz~~

1) School starts already
2) Work getting more and more
3) Assignment date due next week..
4) BBQ this sunday
5) My best friend's wedding coming soon..

hahaa.. seriously.. nowadays i see so many pple ard me having care and dotes by their bfs.. i feels so envy sia~~ haiz~~ maybe i dun have the destiny to find the one yet ba~~

last sat, i went ktv with a niao niao.. haha.. her bf's very sweet wor.. waited for her till late nite when she goes home.. then when she sings, she will call him and let him listen.. wow... sweet hor~~ miss my old past.. where got someone waits for me to reach home.. haiz~~

其实我又开始迷失我的方向了

不懂为什么最静越来越喜欢用华语来述说我的心。当我觉得我有迷失我的方向时，我一点多不觉得很奇怪。为什么，我又有了这种感觉？是不是因为，我周围的人都得到爱他们的人或者都遇到疼爱她们的人， 而我还是一个人走在这个人上吗？其实自己的人生道路并不比那些在生命边界徘徊的人来的痛苦。我想开一点不是没事了吗？可是，是我不懂得珍惜过他吗？为什么我动不动又再想起他？是我还没放手吗？ 还是我一直以来都不懂我自己要的是什么？其实，时间都过了那么久，我真的没放过手吗？ 还是我根本不懂得什么是爱？我有没有伤过人或者是他吗？其实，我也不知道。 很可能，他现在已经是别人的爸爸了，我还在这里不知道该如何是好？哈哈，我真的觉得自己很傻，也很愚笨，笨到不懂极点。

我可以不可以醒来，真的要那么愚笨的过我的人生吗？我已经傻傻的过了要到24年了，在这么过下去，我会得到我的幸福吗？ 虽然别人总说傻人有傻福。。 哈哈！！！！ 我觉得是假的。

这段日子不要爱上任何人!! 一定要找回自己失去的方向才来说。我相信我可以在自己25岁时找到我自己的方向！！ 黄小姐，加油wor！！ 不可以那么轻易就放弃自己的未来，我相信我自己可以找到我的彩虹!!!

Tipsy

Guess Tipsy is the kind of feeling i had now. I will try to numb myself in work and in studies and maybe my private life. but guess this is the moment, i do wish to be alone for a while.

So0o0o0o0o0o0oooo Painful :(

Today i took half day and went to do medical checkup.. haiz~~ didn't know need to do blood test.. so painful~~ this is the second time that i do blood test in my whole entire life.. :( sob sob.. is the auntie dunno hw to poke or ???? guess tml going to be blue black liao~~ haiz~~ i guess sooner or later.. i need to go to pluck out my wisdom tooth le.. but hor~~ i dun dare.. haiz~~~ :( but the clinic had The Arcade had a very nice view. I can oversee the whole of marina bay.. Hehee.. considered quite lucky cos i took afternoon leave, therefore i can avoid all jams. Pray hard, nothing goes wrong for my checkup. Otherwise, i will go bersek leh..
*****Praying very hard********

Last Week arh.. Wat i did arh..

Erm.. I met my buddies for dinner.. Hehee.. :P Supposing i only meet one of them for dinner.. The other one said he nt free, going gym. Ok lor, dun want to force him. Had a short chat with one of my buddies lah.. Then suddenly another one called me, "I just finished OT leh,i come down now to find u all." Hahaha.. Stunned.. We purposely bought Venti drink at Starbucks to wait for him lor~~ Wah lau.. I drink coffee until i wants to puke liao.. of cos lah.. they started to said abt my past and my current.. haiz~~ makes me feel so guilty.. so regret.. wat had happened to me.. gain quite a lot of weight during my 2 years in my ex-company.. sob sob.. now trying very hard to shed them away lor.. haiz~~ jia you hor~~~ one asked me go california gym with him.. another one asked me to join his gf to go gym together.. omg~~~ he still ask me to learn from his gf sia~~ haha.. his gf is my idol liao~~ time to learn from her.. hehee.. i wants to become mei mei de and find a bf.... :X let's see hw long my determination will last this time round.. :P

hahaha... touch hor~~ my friend actually rushed down from tuas to meet me.. hahaa.. :P seriously.. really feel happy at the moment.. now i know.. no matter hw far they are from me.. they are still with me.. i wondering how long will this last.. :X Opps.. am i questioning hw friendly u all are towards me.. Erm.. no lah.. we better dun stay too close.. later your gfs misunderstand, how?

last sat.. i went to eat steamboat with a friend(Secret) and my ex-colleague.. haha.. Secret of cos being very sweet lah.. always cook for me n my friend to eat.. haha... opps.. seems like wat my ex-colleagues said is right.. my gd friends are all guys.. :( later they scare away my future bf, hw? hahaha.. no lah.. they just treat me as a guy buddy.. hahaaha... i think everytime after my steamboat hor.. i will start to sa jiao leh.. OMG!!!! hehee.. i think i purposely de.. they scare.. then i purposely do more.. oppps.. i looks like very rebellious wor~~ Wahahahaa.. :P

I think i did tat to my buddies too when i am a bit tipsy.. haha.. but luckily their gfs ard.. otherwise i will kana whack.. Opps.. must control a bit le wor.. is not like in the past where everybody still single... Wahahaa.. :P

Sort of miss someone so much.. haha.. his friend told me he getting married this year.. haha.. he so caring~~ the first guy who is so caring towards me.. wahaha.. maybe bcos i saw the injuries i had, reminds me abt him.. haha.. when i go out dating with him, he saw me blue black.. Faster bring me to watson and buy all types of medical oils and etc.. Ask me next time must be careful, ok? dun always hurt yourself.. so sweet hor~~ hehee.. plus my xiao xin is from him too as birthday gift.. haha... :P

Puzzled & Confused..

Hahahaa.. Seriously, my feelings had become a mixture of beer and red wine that makes me so drunk now. But it does not means i am drunk physically.. just that i am mentally puzzled and confused.

Last weekend, i meet up with my friends, of cos is organized by me due to i got a few friends having birthday. Haahaha.. A bit disappointed tat day ba, but i am ok lah.. trying my best to keep everyone laughing.. hehee.. :P

These few weeks i ate cake until i almost puke le.. Fattening~~
1) Chocolate cake from The Chocoz.. Omg.. is very rich with chocoalte..
2) Durians Cake from four season.. hehee.. i love durians but the cream is too rich~~
3) Mango Cheese cake from rive gauche... hehe.. nice nice.. but it might be too heaty~
4) Chocolate cake from four leaves.. hehe.. nice nice.. but again.. cream!!!

haha.. after consitantly eating so many cakes.. makes min fall sick again.. omg.. she is so weak now~~

haiz~~ of cos i still went to eat steamboat twice this week.. omg~~ i am not going to eat tat again next week..

One good news to share.. but i share wait until time is ripe then share it out..

haha.. now puzzled and confused part is... i realised something.. he started dun want to share with me his relationship.. tat makes me think in another way.. haha.. but i know is impossible.. a lot of pple starting to guess whether things had gone the wrong way.. haha.. i would like to said.. at the moment is no.. in future is even going to be a big NO.. haha.. pls lah.. he won't like me de...

i had a short chat with him just now.. which is something we dun really do most of the time.. sometimes we will just crap for a while.. he reminds me abt the incident which i did stupidly a year ago.. erm.. of cos.. we started to crap abt my birthday.. he asked me when is my birthday.. haha.. of cos is in oct lah.. ask me when is the date.. siao.. u think i nuts meh.. u had never remember my birthday before.. i doubt that this year.. u will remember it..

hahaa.. as for a celebration or not.. i dunno leh.. the more i hopes it to be.. the more i am scare it will just turn out to be disappointment.. everytime min hopes something to turn well, things will just go haywire. The more i want to be mei mei to go my hao jie mei wedding.. i know sure last min shall got something pops up de.. i dun want to think so much.. maybe is bcos i scare ba.. or i had lose the definition of like, love, habit? i starting to realise i dunno hw to definte any of these words anymore..

haha.. so u asked me wat is this kind of feelings.. i also dunno leh.. just that when i heard him talking to his gf.. sometimes.. i will feel extremely down.. and trying ways to walk away and hide away my feelings.. but there are times that i just encourage him.. i started to puzzle.. wat does this kind of feelings called? maybe he can sense that i am feeling uncomfortable.. tat's why he stopped mentioning his gf in front of me. hahaa.. i dunno.. i started to confuse myself.. maybe i am just afraid i will lose a friend.. there are times that i falling down, i need someone to console me.. haha.. i started to realise i dun have the courage to sms him anymore.. i even told myself... no no.. i can't do that anymore.. ended up, it will just bcome a draft that i never send..

haha.. today, i asked da jie.. hw to make myself more sociable. she gave me one sentence "Open up yourself". How to do it? "Find it out yourself" haha.. i knows wat she means, of cos min is someone who always lock herself in her room.. she seldom will open up herself.. i am not a person who will open that easily ba~~ haha.. i should open more easily.. meet up with more pple.. maybe i will slowly fade away this feelings ba..

maybe bcos of a lesson that i had a few years back.. i started to scare to make the same mistake again.. hahaha.. past is past.. i should no longer looks back.. hw can i always be so persistant to return back to the past..

haha.. i should concentrate on my studies... of cos in my work too.. hopefully i dun screw up a lot of things at work.. and cause disappointment to my bosses..

Hehehe.. Birthday Gift

hahaha.. Last friday, i went to have dinner at cafe cartel... followed by steamboat.. crazy right? Plus having dessert at Ah Chew's dessert place. After eating and eating, i walked to mostafa.. Wahahhaa... :P I saw something which i like leh.. I dropped hint to my two qing ai de brothers.. Hahaha.. Both of us very cute hor.. One moment quarrel, one moment ok.. haha.. Crazy right.. As usual, we are always like that.. Ok lah.. Sometimes he quite pamper me.. But now cannot always liao~ Both of them got gfs liao~~ Erm.. Can i request this one successfully.. Erm.. I doubt it.. Just share with everyone.. haha.. Any hao xin ren wants to buy this for me? Erm.. Guess i had to get this myself~~ Hahaa... :P Last year, i aim a guess watch.. aim until i never buy.. this year, will i buy this puma to pamper myself.. Haha.. Sometimes i wondering.. both of my brothers quite understand me sia~~ haha.. when i am looking at a bag.. one will said "dun envy lah.. go buy lah.. " Then i tell them i am attached.. One of them will said "U believe in her meh?" Erm.. i really got so bad arh? nobody wants? sob sob.. anyway i am used to it liao~~ i really belongs to a category that nobody wants.. wahaha.. =p destined to be single for my lifetime.. haha.. is time to learn independent.. haha.. (Da jie, dun puke when u saw this post.. plus korkor hor.. ) Erm.. Da jie knew me for 6 years.. As usual i am still so childish, immature, spoilt brat.. Korkor knew me for more than 10 years, omg.. i still so dependent on others.. although he might find me that i had grown up by 0.01%? Now is i scold him, not that he scold me.. Wahahaahaa.. :P Opps.. Now i had become the evil one.. Lol.. :P

Hehee.. Brothers they all said planning to help me to celebrate my birthday. Erm.. This year, i had never planned to celebrate my birthday, guess i will have a peaceful birthday ba~~ cos all should be busy pa toh, where got time to entertain me.. :( furthermore i got lessons on the 25th.. Haiz~~ each year also dun have pple celebrate with me.. except last year.. last three years..

21th birthday,i had a chalet at east coast. End up they use my cake as flying cakes.. Hahaha.. I drank a bottle of white wine which i bought a few years back from australia.. Chasing one another with the cakes.. i so good leh.. offering other pple cakes, ended up kana sabo.. hehe.. plus nanny accompany me to watch the 40 year old virgin plus a meal at swensen ba~~~

22nd birthday, i had a chalet too this year.. Futhermore is a halloween decoration chalet at downtown east.. Heavy sponsor by my dearest friend, yy.. haha.. opps... she almost going to kill me le.. lol.. :P had a great fun there, just that we had a quarrelled with our next door neighbour due to bbq pit. Hahaha.. :P oh ya~~ i almost forget le.. We went to Zouk the day before wor~~ then sy, yy, plus dunno who and me come out first.. We walked to clarke quay and sit down.. Futhermore, we went to liang court to have a macdonald breakfast... Then took the eariliest train back to downtown east. No wonder we are so guai lah.. Then once we return back to chalet room, queueing up to bath so that we can sleep.. Hahaa.. :P Ended up dunno which idiot come around 11 plus..then wake all of us up.. we were saying~~ omg~~ we just slept for a while~~ around evening time.. chef comes liao~~ saw the food that we had bbq.. dunno bring who go supermarket to buy food.. wahaha.. :P he bought chocolate and melt.. haha.. then i use ham & chicken wings to dip inside the chocolate.. Ended up.. kana scolded.. -_-'''''' Tat time both of my brothers are attached... plus one of friends... but all broke up in the end.. now they are with different partners le.. hehe.. of cos.. my dearest yy.. also getting marry at the end of the year le.. :P On the actual date, i think nanny very poor thing sia~~ waited for me after work for quite long.. We went to watch the magician show~~ haha.. see.. my memory still quite good right.. haven turned rusty yet...

23th birthday.. haha.. I had a few cakes.. one frm my primary school friend, one frm my ex-colleagues, one frm my da jie n niao niao, one was frm my buddies they all. But the last cake WAS WORST OUT OF ALL.. Is just a small cupcake, ended up it bcome a flying cake... -_-''''''' luckily, was just a small celebration downstair, otherwise i will be dead.. guess everyone will be looking at me sia, if i board bus back home..

This year.. They planning to bring me go clubbing on that day.. Hahaha.. I thinks they only talk talk only right.. will not come true de right.. haha.. asked me go book chalet.. haha.. too bad.. no chalet.. haha.. so stayed at home is the best.. :P just pass me the present can le.. :)

First Hint for my birthday present~~

Puma Stardust Ladies Watch.. Nice nice.. =p



haha.. after having so many years of happening birthday.. really not getting use of a peaceful birthday leh.. haha.. but must slowly getting use to it.. they where got time to entertain me sia~~ all is either attach or getting marry soon le~~ sob sob.. :( hahaa.. Getting married de arh.. Next time u pregnant liao.. must tell me arh.. i helped u take care of your baby when is young.. lol.. :P should be very cute de right.. wahahahaaa.... :P so anxious abt my school plus someone's wedding.. hahaa.. :P first time sia~~ hahaha.. ytd kana 'takan' by my brothers they all.. haiz~~ said.. "Your target is in november leh... then now.......... " -_-'''' haiz~~~ :(

TIME TO BUCK UP

ICE~~

haha.. actually wants to blog about food.. ended up no mood..
sian~~~ afternoon drink tea + coffee.. then just now went to drink coffee bean~~ omg.. today i took too much of caffine~~ omg~~ cannot sleep liao~~

haha.. seriously this week.. i really did something weird sia~~ haha.. had lunch with my long lost friend.. then just now i had coffee with my cousins..

as for my long lost friend.. of cos, it had been a long long time that i really talk to her..

as for my cousins.. haha.. even worst.. i seldom talk to them.. this consider as long talk ba? or ?????

haha.. of cos after i come back from my coffee drinking session.. saw some emails floating in my mail box.. the first one i saw for the gathering.. i almost wants to puke blood or so called i want to straggle pple liao... ARGH~~ u better dun let me see u at the gathering.. FINE~~ we shall fight.. see how will wins.. haha.... :P diao~~ had a short chat with my friend online.. he saw the email.. he said.. "Why both of u fight? You two ma chiam like couple.. " !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the problem we are not.. furthermore he got gf de.. he just wants to irritate me.. or he scare i nobody wants.. wants me faster find a bf.. so i won't disturb..

FINE LOR~~ I GOT BF.. and I AM ATTACHED~~ hahaa.. just tat i never tell u only.. wahaha.. :P

Fireworks~~

Woohoo~~ Of cos fireworks was something that i will not miss especially if there is anyone to accompany me to watch it. Wahaha.. Contiunously, i watched two fireworks shows. Yipee, this year fireworks were so fantastic. I simply just love it so much. On Sat, i got a very good view but seriously i am still a scary cat. While watching fireworks, i was starting to scare, what if i slipped and fall in somewhere near clifford pier there, how? What will happened and etc....... Opps, wondering is it because i am the only child at home, that's why i am this kind of thinking. I need to help my parents to think also mah..... Hahaha.. Or i am just finding an excuses for myself.

Friday, after work. Dad drove me to my ex-company to find my ex-colleagues. Hahaa.. Of cos is my ex-colleagues accompany to watch.. Arbo, still got who accompany me sia~~ lol.. :P Erm.. Had my dinner at vines.. Yummy, it had been so long that i ever eat that. I am starting to miss food over at novena, mainly because i had nothing much over at my workplace now except nasi lemak. OMG, i am so sick of nasi lemak, i will try my best to avoid that but the problem is i don't know what to eat. Guess the next coming month, i had to start to be much more thrify, time to mixed vegetable rice. :( for weight loss and save. Only once in a week, eat something good. Stop going out that often, try to stay home. But the problem is maybe nobody will ask me out cos everyone started to have their partners and busy life le. After my fireworks,i went to The Cathay, trying to catch Journey Over the Center of Earth. But the problem is no shows over there, ended up had to walk to cineleisure. Watched the last two matches of pingpong over at cineleisure kbox before went in to catch the movie. Seriously, i really like this movie. This is a movie must watched sia. If is converted to a 3D movie or 4D movie, i will go and catch it. But provided someone accompany. Omg, i realised i am really not independent at all. :( Sianz~~ After the movie, as usual, i had to wait for 1 hour for 4N. Haiz~~ SBS don't have enough drivers for night drivers, ended up it become i am suffering. OMG~~ I think i am commuters right, commuters should entitle for their own benefits right? Should be they trying ways to upgrade themselves right? Maybe if the market is not so bad now, i guess i most likely will hop onto a cab and go back home to sleep asap. Instead of spending one hour at the bus stop waiting for my bus. No choice lah, cheapskate!!!!! Wanted to take a $2.50 bus home, cos i am broke for the month. 1 4N = 2 others night riders... Why har? No traffic jam late at night leh? Most of the night riders took the same route, just that after selegie, most of the riders will go different ways. But i am waiting at midpoint ORCHARD leh? WTH~~~~ IRIS said 19 mins but the problem is aftr 19 mins, i still couldn't see 4N. -_-''' IRIS got bugs mah? or something is wrong with my network or even my phone sia? There is a point of time where it state, it can detect the next bus. -_-'''' Or is bcos 4N is very unlucky, it will suddenly disappear. Or why not change to something else? like 9N to replace 4N? So the waiting time can cut down to half an hour instead of an hour. Do you know is very poor thing to stand at the bus-stop late at night to wait for a bus that will never comes?

Saturday~~
Due to the bus delay, i reached home around 3 plus. Wah Piang~~ I came out of the theatre at 1 plus. Ended up almost 2.30pm then the bus came. My friend had already reached home, while i just board bus. I woke up around 1 plus in the afternoon. I suppose to go airport to fetch a friend who just came back from aboard. Or considered as my good friend. But due to hongkong got typhoon, flight had been delayed again and again. Therefore i had been keep looking at the website to wait for the confirm time. Then i will leave home for the airport. Sad..... Only certain flights then it will state confirm. -_-''' Haiz~~ is i being too demanding? How come website will only indicate for some airlines. Some airlines will only stated delay .... (time), while some airlines will state confirm .... (time). Therefore, it mislead me lah, let me tot that is not confirmed. I don't dare to go out that early, furthermore is raining heavily outside. But my gd friend had reached before i reached sia. -_-''' feel so guilty sia~~~

Around evening time, i went to meet a friend for fireworks, as usual, i am late. Seriously before meeting my friend, i got such a complex feelings sia. That day, i suppose to meet friends for birthday celebration but i don't want to go that early. I even had the thoughts of not going at all. Erm..... I will not indicate who is this. Haha.. Otherwise things might get worst than i thought. One of my friend msg me telling me that they were at bugis too, wondering whether i will meet them for dinner or not. Of cos on the way walking to find my friend, i kept telling myself, i dun want to meet up with them sia. What is the reason behind that = secret. Wahahaha.. :P When i met up with my gf, i told her my friend had encountered a problem. But i guess most likely she knows is me, i trying so hard to shift to it to bcome someone else. I sounds very bad right, but no choice. She knows my cousins sia, don't want things to get worst. During the chatting with her, i realise there were a lot of things which i had never take note at all. I had never thought whether the things that i do will makes anyone unhappy or not or causes any misunderstanding or not. To me, friends are friends, regardless is guy or girl, isn't it the same? Since now is what generation already, i realise it might be different from my thinkings liao. From the talk with her, makes me think far a bit. But i didn't pick up someone calls, i was keep trying avoid it. I can sense that he is quite pissed off with it. I only reply my friend's msgs. I suppose to join them to eat no signboard seafood with them but i didn't go. I rather watched fireworks than eating. Haha.. :P He knows me so well sia, he said i loves fireworks. All of them had mistaken that i went to watch with my bf, of cos i didn't bother to explain so much already. I still reject his calls when i am watching fireworks. Hahaha.. :P Watching the fireworks cure the pain inside my heart. Very abnormal right? Haha.. Maybe i am not too deep yet? I still can put it out easily. Concentrate on my studies and work ba, don't ever think of that anymore. Supposing to meet up with a guy friend after the fireworks, haha.. i think once i told him i was with that gal.. He said is ok~~ next time ba~~ lol.. or maybe bcos someone never tag along with us, he felt disappointed? Wahaha.. Met up with the gal's friend. Hahaha.. The gal said i am bubbly gal. Erm.. Am i a bubbly gal? I started to ponder about it. Why they thinks i am a bubbly gal? Maybe they never see the side that i am sad before? Even the guy also said i am a bubbly gal sia.. Something is wrong sia, i didn't know i am a bubbly gal. Wahaha.. Or maybe bcos now i started to things easily, don't want to care so much. Maybe i should thanks niao ren for the training she had for me in my ex-company. We had anderson ice-cream over at marina square, after that we went to walk around. Of cos, i am puzzled why my phone never rings nor never received any sms from my friends lah. Haha.. See lah.. My heart had fled there yet still wants to lie to myself that i dun want to go. Saw my friend's gf previous sms le, then i bought a cake from chocoz before going over to find them. Haha.. She told me he had left already. Haha..
I said is ok, i just passed u all the cake then i will go back home. As usual, of cos being polite must called him, telling him i am going there now. See whether he still wants to join us or not. Never tot that, one of my friend who suddenly went missing call me. Asked me where i am, he need someone to talk to. -_-''''' Haha.. As usual lah, he never said anything, i already start to scold him. lol..:P till that he said he called me later. Tmd.. Walked from marina square to suntec to take bus, sian~~ that stupid bus-stop got so many insects.. sob sob.. Ended up i faster board a bus and walk to the place, that i suppose to meet them. Tmd.. dunno is bcos he angry with me or wat, tell me the wrong address.. ARGH~~ then i had to walk back again. when i met up with my friends, i called him and scold him sia~~ wahaha.. :P we bought some stuffs and go back to the room for a small celebration. stupid sia~~ they had been watching soccer but once in a while we changed channel. Saw The Eye, remind me that last time i went to watch a group of people sia~~ He good sia, i asked him to bring a lighter, yet in the end, he brings a lighter that doesn't work at all. Ended up me and my friend's gd had to go down and get it plus we bought some tim sum. Wahaha.. The tim sum not bad sia, i quite like it.. =p The cake got a bit screw up. maybe i too "chu lu le".. But the chocolate is too thick.. plus i got something bitter goes along with me sia~~ wah piang~~ so weird combination.. Hahah.. :P three of us had been playing dai dee till late morning, while my friend's gf already knock out. Win liao, i kept losing. :( drank quite a bit. tmd~~~ kana bully.. there is once i cheat, buahaha.... when he goes toliet, i changed his cards... Haha.. guess he knows lah, but just ignore me. Buahahaha.. He very good hor~~ haha.. too bad~~ pple already taken... haha.. i think towards the end, i started to sa jiao liao~~ haha... cos really starting to get tipsy.. haha... ended up.. all go sleep sia~~ my the other friend accompany me to chat for a while.. ended up all sleep liao~~ 3 piggy leh.. wah lau~~ i still said today morning, i need to go out.. haha.. ended up never sleep.. no lah.. i got sleep for a while, but dunno why i just wake up le. Cannot sleep.. then keep asking them to go eat macdonald breakfast but nobody cares for me. All contiunes to sleep.. :( Actually i had the tots of going off, i wanted to tell them. But.... I dunno why i just couldn't make myself to do that. Then ended up sit there lor~~ watch movies.. sian~~ haha.. he woke up and talk to me for a while, then he knocked out again.. haha.. seriously.. i dunno when this feelings come.. haha.. weird right.. something just goes very wrong ba~~ seriously.. i really thinks i am very xin fu inside the room.. i had this two good friends.. haha.. but maybe guess now i had lose both of them le ba... hahah.. another one is ok.. cos his gf is so friendly.. then of cos lah.. i keep using pillows to beat them.. haha.. next time cannot do it liao~~ later their gfs not happy~~ haha.. seriously.. dunno why.. maybe bcos both of them accompany me during my downtime at work ba~~ suddenly got the bonding with them ba~~ but too bad~~ things won't last long de.. 3 of us said before, hoping each of us will find our the other partner soon. Now 2 of them had found, i am happy for them. Haha.. Not that i am not close either one of them. Is just that my feelings went a bit haywire for the other person. I also don't know when it had bcomes to work in this way. But don't worry, i will make sure it will goes back the correct way to make sure things dun screw up again. Hahaa.. thanx for being there each time for me, hearing my grumbling when i just came back from hongkong. of cos i will never forget wat happened last year, after that day i had changed.. =p thanx for always looking after me.. today is really had bcome a memories that i will cherish it~~ thanx pals~~ guess after today, we will seldom meet up anymore.. i will cut the times that i joined u all. guess now i will try to find tons of excuses to avoid joining u all. but i will miss you all.. :) maybe that is one of the reason that i kept looking u all when u all are sleeping.. hehee.. =p i had an enjoyable night with you all, although is just a simple birthday celebration. Dun worry, i won't have this kind of celebration for my birthday. Guess by then, u all had already forgotten my birthday. And i might be busy with my studies lah. and forgets u all... otherwise later i started to dun bear to let go, how? Stuck with you all often.. Hahaa.. :P i dun want always be a lightbulb in between you all.. Hahaha.. Dun worry for me.. :) At least u all can go for double dates.. :) or think too much le~~ for me, i will let the nature takes the course.. :) haha.. if i got le.. u all dun bully him arh.. or 吓跑他wor.. later no pple wants me, how.. wahaha.. :P

hehe.. 我会很想念你们的。。你们一定要好好的疼爱她们wor.. 不过我相信你们一定会的。。放心我一当把我自己的心情收拾好来，我一定会从新再你们的面前出现的。我就让时间冲淡一切，当时间觉得我应该出现的时候，我就一定会出现的。 :)

Just got my tots sorted

Haha.. I got my tots sorted.. Maybe the incident tat happened long time ago, left me a deep scare. Of cos, i will not do such a stupid thing~~ haha.. dun ever like yr gd friend.. gd friend shall always remains as gd friend.. haha.. guess nowadays i will seldom online especially when i am at home. Mum's backache is back.. nowadays must act guai.. stay at home to help out some household chores.. Guess maybe is due to that fall she had over in genting.. once in while, it will come back and haunt her.. just brought her to see doctor on last sunday, doctor said is a bit swollen.. avoid most household chores.. of cos i also went to see doctor also.. since i am there already.. spent another $38 sia~~ haha.. doctor said quite bad~~ haha.. took my second dosage of antibotics.. hahaha.. till now i still haven recover.. doubt i will go for my friend's birthday celebration on this coming sat~~ haha.. guess maybe i dun want to make the same mistake that i did last year... secrets.. shall remain as secrets...

失声 Day 4

Haha.. Enjoy life too much? Doubt it. School going to start in about less than 2 months time. Wohoo!! Is time to make myself busy again~~ Opps.. I wants to have enrich lifestyle, otherwise i am too slack le..

1)I did went to my company dnd. Woohoo.. i love their lucky draw prizes.. hehe.. too bad, i did not participate in the lucky draw, cos i am not entitled to that. Overall i did enjoy myself that nite

2) I went to yy's housewarming. haha.. really a bit like piang my head towards the wall sia~~ haha.. been quite quiet that night ba~~ i went there for a little while, then i went over to find da jie they all at clarke quay.. Haiz~~ da jie lost her diamond at pump room.. :( i tried the calamari there.. BAGUS~~~ VERY NICE~~ the nicest calamari that i ever had sia~~ Miss it so much...

3) Had a small celebration for my shifu, the day after yy's housewarming. Erm.. We went to had dinner at marina square, i had a soupy noodle.. Hehee.. is nice~~ Opps.. i just came back from hongkong not long ago, yet i went to hongkong cafe to eat.. This time round, one of my brothers is there. Haha.. one of my friend said "wow.. two of u bicker a lot sia. " Hahaha.. use to it le lah~~ we always argue de.. haha..

4) Nowadays i had been skipping quite a few outings .. Haha.. dun asked me why.. just feel very tired..

5) haha.. guess i am crazy.. i gt a crush on someone who gt gf.. haha.. hopefully this crush will fade as soon as possible and i will be back to normal.. :P after so long, i had slowly bcome to be so normal.. i dun want it to ruin it again~~ let nature takes it course..

Hong Kong Itinerary

First Day 17th July
- Reach HongKong Airport at 7 plus pm~~
- Out of HongKong Aiport and take bus A21 to Yau Ma Tei
- Reach Hotel around 9plus pm
- Out of Hotel Room for dinner at Temple Street
- Walk Around Temple Street
- Back Hotel at 12 plus

Second Day 18th July
- Leave Hotel around 10..
- Had breakfast at a nearby shop
- Proceed to DisneyLand
- Back to Hotel around 11 ba~~

Third Day 19th July
- Leave Hotel around 11am~~
- At Dim Sim for breakfast~~
- Wait for my Cousin to cut hair~~
- Around 1 plus, proceed to The Peak..
- Reach Peak around 2pm ba~~
- Come down Peak at 6pm~~
- Proceed to have dinner~~ had a hard time to find the really good restaurant~~ ended up at very good..
- 9plus.. walk along ladies market~~
- Go back to hotel at 12 plus..

Fourth Day 20th July
- 10 plus leave hotel room for macau~
- Reach back hongkong at 12plus midnite~~
- back hotel room around 1am~~

Fifth Day 21th July
- had breakfast~~
- follow by.. my cousin doing rebonding, while i do treatment~~ haha..
- went for a short walk while waiting for my cousin to do hair~
- tried yi shun pudding~~ bought some stuffs at sasa~~
- back to the shop and grab some chocolates~~
- Then back to hotel room.. follow by going to xu liu shan for mango dessert~~
- Jade market for a short stroll
- follow by going to ladies market for a short walk~~

Sixth Day 22th July
- Leave hotel room and buy bread
- go to ta yu shan to visit big buddha~~
- haha.. when i come down, is already time to go back to singapore~~
- i miss tung gate.. didn't manage to go there doing shopping~~ haiz~~

erm~~ i didn't really do a lot of shopping over there~~

guess i need a break~~

haha.. ever tot of whether after my trip, i bcome very weird.. very quiet? haha.. sometimes i also dunno~~ i feel a bit puzzled and lost~~ just suddenly feel the emptiness~~

i like or love life that is simple but once you realize that everyday is the same, you will start to get bored about it. But sometimes suddenly everything come together, you will feel that everything just turn upside down..