What is your new year resolution?
>> I don't know...

What is the greatest regret you had?
>>Too many to state it out...

'He' -- appear too much times in my story.
Min -- created by him 3 years ago. ( always yearn to have a fairy story tale in her life.. but as time passes, she realize there are no such thing called fairy tale in her life... )
Jie -- came into my life 3 years ago too. (3 years ago, you were really very weak. 3 years later, you become stronger. And accidentally, you hurt the guy who love you the most. )
Jiefu -- 3 years ago too.. (always hear me cried.. hahaa.. the first time i heard u cried... i am stunned... Know you for 3 years le, the only time i heard you drinking like crazy was when you got hurt deeply. Maybe it reminds me is time to let go my own fairytale story)
Justin -- my gd friend who came into my life when i am sec 1

---

Today is 31 of Decemeber, is also the last day of the calendar. Maybe my story tale should end on the dot of 12 midnite and let it to kept in a book instead of my poor heart. My poor heart been thru so many sad events, i think i should let my tears stopped and create a brand new life for myself.

If i am nt wrong, i broke up with L not long after i got my 'O' level result. A few months later, i met 'the guy', jiejie and jiefu. Erm...... The conversation of us turn sour. When i knew this guy, he was still studying in uni. A poor guy staying in his hostel and don't like to talk on phone. The first time, i talk on the phone was when Justin scold me thru my voicemail. Couldn't remember what had happened at that moment. I told him that i am so sad, that was the first time Justin scold me. Slowly, we bcome quite close friends. The four of us will play daidee or mahjon online. The worst thing is i am always late when i met him. He was a very impatient person who couldn't stand pple late. The problem is he had met LATE QUEEN...

I went to watch Lord of the Ring Part 1 with L. Supposely, i should meet joanne after the movie but we sneaked off after that show. Tat time, i still complaining how come the show was so long. Plus we went to Simei to watch. Hai~~~~ While about a year later, I watched the second show with jiefu, a friend of mine and him. Actually jiejie wanted to catch with us on tat day but too bad she needs to meet her cousin. Jiefu asked me a very stupid question, "You very cold arh? Keep pulling your jacket..." "Ahem, of cos i am feeling very cold lah, imagine you sitting inside the theatre for more than 3 hours leh"

'The guy' met my Justin before too. He waited for about less than half an hour ba over at 'K......... ' mrt station. After that, we went to KFC for supper. I guess he don't like tat supper. He seems like was being questioning Justin but i do not dare to utter a sound at all.

'The guy' met my mum before too. It was just a very conincident that we met my mum at Bugis while she went out with friends. He was coming down from Bukit Timah and keep telling me not to be late but i ended up i am late. His face was like Justice Bao like that. So 'Black', even my mum knew tat he was angry also. When i reached home, mum seems to approve me and 'The guy'. I kept emphasing that both of us were just gd friends.

Last year July, i got my first part-time job. It was waitress at Siglap Cafe Cartel. That job was pretty fun, met a lot of new pple. They were quite friendly and nice pple. Everyday after work, he will always give me a buzz and accompany me to talk on the bus. Just don't understand why do we had so many endless topics to talk about.

In August, a lot of pple knew that min had a very big blow. She started to know how the feeling to lose a kin in life. She also gave up the friendship or the like she had for this guy. They were just so close but did not stepped into a relationship ba. She tot she need time to build herself up but two weeks later she regret. The pain been piling inside her deeply, trying so hard to find back the friendship. Yesh, she got it back but he still fly away without telling her. She only knew it from his friend's msg. I knew he was at airport when he msg me "Take care of yourself". I woke up before he is boarding the plane, i had a short chat with him before he left sg for one and half months ba. Jiefu been hearing me cried during that period of time. Too many things happened. Justin admitted to hospital due to accident. I left when the moment he is going to operating theatre but just that min really afarid of hospital. Not to mention, Justin was angry with me and msg me "Don't need you to come and visit me again". Slowly getting used to the temper he had, he seldom wants care from me. Normally is i seek care and a listening ear from him.

'The guy' and i used to have a bet, "Who will graduate first?". If he never met me, he might already graduate and working now. He move from hostel to home and from then onwards, his results starts to drop. Seriously, from this friendship you had for me is really sweet. Holding on phone when both of us were studying for exams and when i got questions, you will always help me. When i need reference books, you will always tell me "I got lah, don't need to waste money to buy." No matter what happened to me, you will just be there for me. Slowly, you had bcome part of my life that someone who i don't wish to lose. But i still lose at the end of the story. Even though we do not have anymore topics to talk about, i think we are still friends ba.

---

Conclusion...
>> That's the end of my story...
>>Greatest regret of the year, i lose four gd friends who can always lend me a ear when i needed it.
>>Hopefully, i can met someone better than you or like you. Few more thing to add:
'The guy' -- you had changed to be better than who i know you three years ago
***************************************
'Jiefu' -- I know you are numb abt wat is going. Hopefully, you will have a better fruitful year tomorrow. And in relationship prospect, you and that girl will be officially together ba.. Plus let go of the past, dun let it always stay inside you.
****************************************
'Jiejie' -- If the guy you like is hurting you deep, why not let go. I don't wish to see you get hurt again. As you see how min fell so deep and how long she takes to stand up again.
*****************************************
'Justin' -- So fast, kor i had knew you for going to 9 nine years. Knowing me for so long, you should understand me much more than other ba?? But i don't think so bcos i dun even understand myself. You been telling me this three years to let go but i just don't know why i had landed myself so deep. But don't worry, i am fine. I just wants my brithday surprise from you. You are always so sweet, bring a black forest cake to my house here and celebrate my birthday. Kor, i wish you had a fruitful year and good luck in relationship. If you never try out you and her, you will never know the results. Try looking for her again ba.
******************************************
'YY' -- is time to let go le..... is nt easy to do tat.. but if i willing to give it a try, why not? is either you go for it or u let go.. My pal, i really wish to see you will find your happiness... :) Take care...
******************************************
'Banana' -- The happiest woman between us.. Good luck and all the best to you... I also want to see you to find your happiness next year wor... Then i opened chalet and you shall bring him to come and see us...
*******************************************
Not to mention, i still got a lot of pple to wish them happy new year...
i will cut it short and sweet...

To all my friends:

I hope that everyone will have a fruitful year and find their beloved ones from tomorrow onwards. As for career, everyone of us must work hard. If there is a chance to climb higher, don't forgo the chance. Bcos chances don't come that easily. Most imptly is MUST TAKE GD CARE OF HEALTH!!!! don't drink too much on festival seasons arh... (especially ESTERLING AND LEE NIAO YING!!!) :P

erm... Monday...... left office quite early.. supposely to meet rena for shopping spree.. ended we change to another day.. due to too tired and restless to go out...

Tuesday.... went out to have dinner with my parents.. it was pretty nt bad.. but there was dropped of standard for the food... (had a pretty late dinner) plus had a terrible gastric pain...

Wednesday.. took a day of mc... dun really have feel like eating any thing...

Thursday.. met banana and her 'husband' for dinner.. waited for half an hour for my grilled chicken at a CAFE over PS.. The supervisor just told us.. "IT TAKES TIME TO GRILL THE CHICKEN" After that, the missing of lingrine was bcos THE KITCHEN HAD NO MORE. The cashier did not inform you abt tat arh?? Guess Irene they all never do their work... Therefore i diam diam liao.. since banana said nvm... then.. lot of terms and things happend during dinner table.. hahaahaa.. 'somebody changing target lah', who is the target lah n blah blah... ( ask me for more details ba...hahaha.. )

Friday..went to had pizza hut for lunch.. on company treat.. hahaa.. received a msg from kw... "Help help, whose birthday is coming... " first reaction, u are dead.. hahaha... discuss with him abt sat outing which is nt confirm.. plus asking him to go eat paris international buffet...

Saturday, took abt less than 8 hours of sleep.. plus drank vodka the nite before.. makes me feel a bit giddy.. planning to watch king kong but tickets were selling super fast.. make me this organsier head a bit very big.. therefore change to dinner with them... met kelvin, winston and soo yuan for dinner at parkway... hahaha... went to JB tat day.. nothing much to shop ard.. but the egg tarts were gd..

Last Monday, i went to watch Chicken Little. The movie considered so-so, i gave abt 3 out 5 stars.

Tuesday was a very shagged day. Can you imagine tat i had to work till 2plus am...

Wednesday, i went to work at 10am... But i am really very chagged and tired. Try to leave a bit earilier by seeking my team leader tat i need to left a bit earilier. Surprisely, she approved and i left a bit earilier. I went to have some time for myself. When to Liang court to read magazine, follow by i met someone for dinner. I will nt miss my favourite ice-cream, green tea with red bean. Heehee.. :P After dinner, immediately took cab home and sleep early.

Thursday, sort of work OT again. Hehehee.. :P In actual fact, i also must wait for my cousin. I am meeting her for coffee session. Sort of discuss our plans for next year june holiday. Seems like my schedule quite packed hor?? But in actual fact, it was not quite packed. Just tat when you start working life, you will have lesser time to spend with your friends and family. My cousin treated me NYDC.. haha.. bcos i am so hungry, i miss my dinner again. But i got my starbucks coffee... =p I went ard 6pm to downstair and collect it, plus i got one more free latte due to the slow service.. hahaa.. Seems like i very cheapo hor.. No choice arh, almost half of the pple went down to queue for it. So why not i just join in the fun. Anyway, i went down is almost knocking off time..

Friday, i went to eat seoul garden with my colleagues. It was quite fun though i only i know them less than a month. Maybe bcos last week, i did not have a gd rest. My body felt so resltess, whenever i finish my dinner, i will feel extremely tired.

Saturday, my auntie and uncle came over to my house. Kept them accompany for a while. Before my auntie left, she asked us next time go over to her house. Erm... Maybe it really been a long long time tat i went over to visit them... Jialat.... Seems like i am neglecting my family... I always reached home ard 12am.. then had so little time for them, felt tat i am staying at hotel sia. Wake up already, go to work. Sometimes i will reach home late. There doesn't seems to have anytime for myself to do stuffs tat i like. During evening time, meet those guys and yy for dinner. They called me and wait for them downstair. BUT they thinks i will be late. Tat's why they still at home play game. Seems like they had bcome much more smarter.. lol.. :P Therefore i went upstair to winston's house. Hehehe.. He bought quite a number of CDs and offer me whether i want any CDs.. YES!!! i borrow 4cds from him... hehee.. :P We went to eat Pasta Mania, followed by a drink at coffee bean. Seriously this bunch of guys really changed a lot. No matter is in physically or behaviour. Lastime during sec school time, cafes is totally out for them. BUT now, they are the ones who wants to go there. I planned this coming thursday to go watch king kong. Don't know some of them on or nt. Hopefully YY can come... pls.... (very pathetic look wor... :) ) while my 'lao po', she is having exams now... so study hard.. jia you wor... :P

Last week, i got a busy week...

Monday, i knock off at 6.15. That's was pretty early as the whole team was still over there working very hard and i just leave early due to i pretty shag and tired...

Tuesday, got to work OT.. Again.. haha.. and sort of we are the latest to left office.. i left office at 10pm with my colleague. When we stepped out of US, it was raining heavily outside.. :'( Tot of sharing cab home, since he stayed at Pasir Ris. But there was long queue, so we choose to take mrt home. I was much more poor thing. I went to took bus home. On the way home, i feeling so cold and hungry.. jialat leh...

Wednesday, met CYY for Harry Porter.. Erm sort of i watched tat before, just dun want to mention to her. Bcos i had promised to watch together. Therefore i did not make any comment for this movie in my blog.... hahaha... But she waited me for quite a while over at orchard due to i got some stuffs to do on hand. Actually i wondering, if i going to meet her to watch Chicken Little on this coming week. Will i be able to go? I got to do a throughly testing for this coming week. Hopefully, it will make my time to pass easily and learn more things. Rather than slacking thru the mornimg and afternoon and need to work OT at nite... A bit touched tat my friend all the way from paya lebar took train down to have lunch with me.. :) thanks..

Thursday, AGAIN OT.. ***** too much OT to be done. Sian.. hopefully my christmas and new year will not be burn. btw.. my friend asked me a question, "Want to watch Harry?" I said NO... i am not going to watch harry for so many times.. hehee.. paiseh arh...

Friday, quite tired but whenever i got the tot of the outing. I was pretty awake but is sort of forcing myself to feel awake... At nite, we got a team outing.. Heehe..:P Luckily, i just managed to clear things on hand before we set off for the outing. Our first stop suppose to be Chong Chong(Serangoon) in the end change to opposite Bedok Camp. We had a whole table of food...Since i am the newest.. I was being force to eat more.. so full... and we proceed our way to Marina South for Bowling.. Heehe.. still not bad lah.. 14 of us, only 10 of us played while the 4 of them be cheer leader. But we exchanged shoes after one match of bowling.. :) some of them left early.. therefore, we only left with 11 pple in the van. Actually, two of them wanted to left early but one of them can't stand the tempation of DURIANS.. They manged to stay thru the whole nite and we even drove thru orchard to see the lights..

Places where we had went:

1. Dinner at the Hawker centre opp. Bedok Camp
2. B0wling at Marine Bay
3. X.Mas Lighting at Ochard Rd
4. Durians and Bean Curd at Geylang
5. Drove thru the red light district..
6. Went to Changi Village to see ..............
7. Went to changi Airport at 2.43AM(had a feeling tat i was in oversea, and i am rushing to catch a flight.. hahaha.. :P)
8. Had MacDonald Breakfast at 5am in the morning
9. 6am- Sunrise at East Coast(due to drizzling, we miss the sunrise.. :( )
10. Home sweet Home (I am the one who stayed very near to east coast, therefore i am the first one to alight and go back home to sleep. :) )

Places where we planned to go before the whole outing.....

1. Dinner at chong chong
2. Bowling at Marina South
3. Cozy Bay (luckily we never went there, a place where there are tons of memories for me)
4. Durians at Geylang
5. Mt Fabar(which i wanted to go a lot, who can bring me there again?)
6. Tunnel at Labordor Park (so scarely, luckily never go.. hehehe.. )
7. Prata at Fong Sheng
8. Jurong Fish Port
9. Sunrise at Marina Bay
10. Home sweet Home

**A great difference better where we had planned and where we had go right?? haha.. maybe bcos of the rain, we had to change our entire plan.. Hopefully next time we can go tree top walk.. :)

Sat, had been a very busy day for me. Can u imagine tat min does not had enuff sleep for the past few days and she reached home at 6.30am on sat morning. She woke up at 1.30pm but she was so tired and went back to sleep till 2 plus.. Then followed by called daddy where is he? He dropped me off at Yishun. And i am so blur tat i had mistaken Redha's wedding address. I tot is 834, i realised i got the wrong address when i reached there. Therefore, i ringed up Lydia. Haha.. then she told me is 824.. I went to pass him hongbao and took some pics before i leave. I never ate anything over there. And i heeded home after tat.KM asked me whether i want to join them over at wala.. I was complaining my head is so painful tat i rejected that even there was free transport home. Ard 9 plus, i went to joyce's bbq at east coast. AGAIN, i mistook the bbq pit number.. I tot is 16.. When i reached there, i saw a grp of Malays. I know tat i went to the wrong pit.. then i walked further down.. hai~~ sotong queen sia..

Seriously, i do had a lot of feelings for this week tat i wanted to post it out. But just couldn't find the time to go do any posting. Ever since min is young, she always wanted a fairy tale relationship. But everytime it doesn't seem to be a happy ending. Now is she getting more and more puzzled, wat does she wants in a relationship anymore. Everytime when the relationship had came to a stop, she will be hoping tat she will meet someone better on the way. As the way seems to get longer, she seems to be more tired to wait. She wanted to find a stop and rest or just give up to wait for the bus and keep walking alone on her own. On the way of walking to her destination, she got friends to keep her accompany on the way. Till certain destination, they will still drop off and said goodbye to her.

Seriously, L and k seems to walk into my life again. Haha.. Suddenly i had this tot of them again. Why? Maybe was bcos they used to pamper me a lot. Just give in to me plus they sweet memories that they had given to me once. But from now, min will just walk alone to the destination till she really met someone nicer than L n K or someone who can understand her as well as they do... :)

I realised tat in my life, there are a lot of turning points. Whether is it happy or unhappy, i still had to face it. What i can said now is, i am happy who i am now and what i had now. Whether will i cherish these moments, it will be unpredictable. Whether i had a make of decision of staying or leaving, i will normally use a reason to support myself. This is sort of a childish and selfish way of doing things.

At my turning point of 21... i had experience some different stuffs.

1) communication with pple...

• as for me, i am a poor at communication but when u know me longer.. u will think i am nt tat shy..

2) attend DND

• tat was my first DND in my entire life... sort of... never expect tat i got a chance to go to such grand place for my first DND.... and it was fun... learn a bit more on socialising..

3) attend wedding

• this coming sat, i will be attending my ex-colleague wedding over at Yishun(i guess)
• I missed Wenting's wedding last year but this time round, i am attending my friend's wedding... wow.... first time..

4) going to an outing with my colleagues

• my team leader had organise an event on this coming friday to celebrate the closure of part of this project... and my parents had actually approved me to go... the outing will be last for 12 hours... can i tahan???

Time passes really fast, it had been a week since i ever post something in my blog. Maybe i shall just do a summary about wat had happened to me during this whole week.

Tuesday, was my second day of work. I joined kim and her friends for lunch. Sort of i swop my seat with my colleague which we "MUSICAL CHAIR".

Wednesday, i went to watch Just Like Heaven with km. hehe.. That movie was considered not bad but i just dun understand how come i drop my tears at the very last moment. I felt a bit guilty towards km bcos i let waited for almost an hour. I wanted to go over to suntec after work. When i was on my way, my ex-colleague rang me asking me to do a favour for him. Of cos, i agreed to that. Therefore, i went back home trying to access to the email, too bad that account had already cancelled. I tried Ben & Jerry ice cream over at suntec, it was pretty not bad. :)

while as for work, i had my first meeting with users at late afternoon. It was pretty scarely, as i do not know anything about my job scope, yet i had to introduce myself to them. On their forehead, it state "Don't mess with me!". hehe.. They don't look friendly at all.. Does all the user had same the attitudes?

Thursday, had been a very shagged day for me. I guess i only had less than 5 hours of sleep and i need to get up for work. I had been yawning ever since morning. I had a second round of meeting, it was pretty much more worst than on wednesday. This meeting involve more than 150 pple. Wah piang!!! Still need to introduce ourselves, but as usual i hide at a corner without letting other pple realising.. hahaha.. :P

At nite, i went to attend my last section of LIFA. It was pretty fun but this mischevious min, took a long journey to reach bukit merah. It starts at 7pm, i reached almost 8pm. I felt so tiring, due to being pressurize by my leader and my forum coach. I had to be there since i don't want to break my promise towards them.

Friday, i really felt very shagged but i am excited to attend **** asia pacific annual DND.. Hehehe... I had been counting down ever since i stepped into office. It was very fun, they got a good host, Eddy. This malay guy knows how to speak in many languages and know how to react. We really had a great time. And i did drunk quite a lot of red wine and white wine. It tastes really good sia. After tat, i met km for supper.. hahaha.. but he said i am quite drunk... though supposely, we should be meeting nad and cherlyn for supper too.. Due to next day i got to work, i choose to go somewhere nearer.. sorry arh...

Saturday, got scolding due to friday came back home a bit late plus did not pick the calls from home. Sort of kana condemn by my parents, ended up i stayed at home to be a good girl. I went to Orchard to collect my ipod nano and exchange my cable vision setup box. Never joined either bunch of them for drinking session/shopping/movies/pool.....

Sunday, my cousin brought my granny to my house. After tat, we went to cycle at east coast. I realised that it changes a lot. Pple were so inconsideration. I know it is weekend, pple tend to go dating. BUT the track is already tat small, u had to prevent knocking towards pesdestrain and LOVERS!!!!! ONE couple actually hold their hands to cycle. !@#$%!!!!!! sigh.... guess weekend, is nt a good timing for me to cycle. Otherwise, i really got to train my patient to stand this kind of inconsideration pple.

MY FIRST DAY OF WORK SUCKS!!!!!


This is how i felt at my first day of work... i walked alone to united square... trying to be independent, telling them tat i know my way there.. once i reached there, i am lost... seriously, i had never saw so many pple in an office before.. this is scarely... trying to act steady.. manage to find my team leader...then she trying to find a small place for me to squeeze in.. and i felt tat my life is very miserable from tat moment onwards.. i had been reading the powerpoint slides from 10plus till i knock off at 6plus..except my lunch break... feel so restless to go back to work tomorrow.. hopefully, i can make my day better tomorrow.. hai~~ a bit regret why i had left my old boss.. :'(

at the evening time, i met my friend for dinner.. saw her dnd clothes.. not bad.. now i trying to make sure i am not totally black tat day.. but when i was at her home.. i start to felt my backache is coming... erm.. i did not carry any heavy things using my back force.. how come i felt tat sharp pain again.. let's me pray hard tat tomorrow i can walk.... otherwise.. u all might had to come to hospital to visit me...

hai~~~ these two days been very moody and f33ling terrible.. he still the one who understand me the most... haha.. just told him a sentence, he know wat's wrong with me.. there isn't any past nor future for us.. lol.. tat's the truth... i accept the truth and move on with my life... but i realise tat i couldn't really let go as easy as wat i said... if i had put down and walk off, i won't had lie to him abt my leaving. Seriously, i did got the urge to leave this place and go to another place for some time. maybe i am a coward, i dun want to let go wat i had now. my family and my friends n .......... or maybe the time is not right yet...

after knowing wat happened to my grandfather, things had been changing dramatically. most of us spent our time at home, rather than going out often.. maybe tat's wat called human. when it is time for pple to leave, we will tend to cherish him/her at the very last moment.

is time to pack up my feeling and prepare myself to go for my new change of environment.

today feel quite happy, received sms from a friend who is now in oversea. at least, he never neglect me. thanks.. ;) but today received weird msg from someone... she seems like going to end her life in any moment.. hai~~~~~~~

erm... guess i going to start work soon le... 2 more days to g0... supposely to meet jiefu to take vodka from him... but never msg or call him...

Last tuesday, i went to Thomson Medical Centre for my check-up. I guess it should be pretty fine. But i don't know why i got the urge to settle down soon. hahaa... :P Over there, you will see a lot of expression of how parents felt. Some husbands are sweet to accompany their wife to do medical checkup while others were sitting alone there. After that, i went to orchard with mummy. I brought her to try ding tai feng, pretty not bad but my wallet got a hole to amend. sob sob.. :'( heheee...

Wednesday, went to buy my dinner and dance dress.. erm.. in actual fact, i wasn't feeling very well but insisted to go and get my dress. otherwise i dun even know wat to wear tat day. Should i get time off my superior?

give myself two weeks break before starting a new job, was to give myself sufficent time to think what i want in life? what should i do? but ended, i stepped into my messy life instead of pulling myself out. Seriously, i am starting to scare of the arrival of monday. Everything going to be brand new again. Will i adapt to the new environment or will i backoff at the very last minutes. Pple who knows me well, should know i am someone who are not good at words. sian... will i be able to meet new friends or ended up i meet m0re enemies than friends??

last friday, went over to jiejie's house... we went for a swim. after tat back to her house for dinner and borrow a few cds from her... told ah-ma tat i am jobless now.. she looks worried for me... in the end, i told her.. i m changing my job.. then she felt more relieved.. sian.. when i reached orchard, i missed my last bus.. knowing tat i will take cab home.. i disturbed my friend by asking him to send me home.. erm.. this friend hor.. very good sia.. when i reached home..then he replyed me.. hai~~~ maybe i should walked to far east to try my luck to wait for 16A.. but after last week experience....... i changed my mine.. took a bus to suntec then took cab home.. wah piang.. is almost the same price as taking cab from orchard lor... i am such a fool....

saturday, brought mummy out... supposely to meet jiejie at orchard to take back my sweater.. tot of maybe brought mummy will be a good idea.. since she was at home.. plus daddy won't be back home so early... after so many things happened over at my granny's house.. he got to look after tat shop.... tot of bringing her to ding tai feng to eat "xiao long bao" but the queue was too long.. crystal jade... again.. too crowded... haha.. i brought her n my cousin to ZARA.. hehe.. tat skirt again.. my cousin wanted to sponsor me a bit.. but i rejected... i am still waiting.. anyone wants to chip in...lol... :P maybe i will get it when i get my first month salary...

hahaha... been thinking about these few days whether should i blog/wat should i blog...my life???

Seriously in my life... it had a lot of ups and downs.. which i dun even know.. and most of time.. there will be someone guiding me or lend me a lending hand to pull me up.. whether is tat a good choice or bad choice.. since secondary days, i got a very protective korkor... but now he is in indonesia.. got a shifu.. who will always help me in my studies.. hehe.. plus sometimes when i got problems.. he might be a good person to seek for advice.. got another da huan dan.. haha... :P sometimes he accompany me to drink and chat... lalala... i got two gfs.. who are sweet at moments... who will always be there... ;) actually, there will still two sweet guys appear in my life.. tat was ........ and my "jiefu" during my poly life... jiefu.. always hear me cried.. lol.... while ............ push me to be stronger... and he was the one who give me the nickname "min"...

for those who been to my birthday chalet.. must had saw how sweet my cousins were.. seriously they are really very sweet and nice pple tat i ever had.. really very grateful for wat they had done during my chalet plus my childhood life.. they painted my life with colours.. ;)

while the other side of my life.. is darkness... now nt to be mention... my life is in a mess now..

> P ERSONAL PERCEPTION
>
> Different people have different perception. One
> man's meat could be
> another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from
> the market. On the
> way home,a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither
> of them ride on the
> donkey?"Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife
> ride on the donkey.
> He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and
> commented, "The
> husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride
> on the donkey while
> the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife
> quickly got down and let
> the husband ride on the donkey.
>
> Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She
> commented, "How can
> the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He
> is no gentleman."
> The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him
> on the donkey. Then,
> they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey,
> how can you hold up
> the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."
> Hearing that, the
> husband and wife immediately climbed down from the
> donkey and carried it
> on their shoulders.
>
> It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a
> narrow bridge, the
> donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their
> balance and fell
> into the river. You can never have everyone praise
> you, nor will
> everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at
> present, and never will
> be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our
conscience is clear..

BE PATIENT
>
> This is a true story which happened in the States. A
> man came out of his
> home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his
> three-year-old son
> was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of
> the truck. The man
> ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the
> little boy's hands into
> pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he
> rushed his son to
> the hospital.
>
> Although the doctor tried desperately to save the
> crushed bones, he
> finally had to amputate the fingers from both the
> boy's hands. When the
> boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged
> stubs, he innocently
> said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he
> asked, "but when are
> my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home
> & committed
> suicide.
>
> Think about this story the next time someone steps
> on your feet or u
> wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your
> patience with
> someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken
> bones & hurt feelings
> often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the
> difference between the
> person and the performance. We forget that
> forgiveness is greater than
> revenge.
>
> People make mistakes. We are allowed to make
> mistakes. But the actions
> we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

erm.... wednesday... MR sweet and nice gary waited for us at expo for one hour... hehe.. luckily he never killed me and yy... therefore we gave him a treat... plus tat day... i am too blur... the food fair is at next week... ended up.. we went in to metro sales... erm.. nothing much also.. after tat.. we went to geylang serai.. manage to squeeze thru the crowds.. but nothing much to buy... therefore we walked to geylang to eat durians.. worst still $19 for A DURIAN... but we went to buy packet durian.. guess i bcome more and more auntie.. bargian and compare prices here and there...

thursday... i went to wala wala with km.. erm.. i think for sure is tat the band was good.. quite enjoyed my stay there.. but sort of my "shyness" make me feel scare and nervous.. duno wat to say.. dunno wat to do.. erm... there were so many pple who i dunno.. plus something is worst............................ hai~~~ but at least met a few nice pple...

erm... due to under friend's influence... nowadays i join a forum.. haha..:P today met up with a few of his friends.. they had a party over at gallery hotel.. erm.. we will like trying very hard to reach there plus... quite a number of ma lu things happened.. lol.. got is quite fun to knoe this two pple.. seriously when km wore out that uniform.. i was laughing out so loud.. forgotten watever is in my mind.. in the end.. i still choose to leave.. and head home alone.. why? at nite km going to send me back home.. but why i still choose to leave.. the reason might bcos it was such a big crowd.. plus dun really know everyone inside.. guess it should be part of my fear doing me a favour of not going in.. plus.. wat if later i really get drunk how?? i know i won't control my limits.. so sad.. i still left the party.. the guy over at the receptionist so cute sia.. still smile at me.. haha.. guess customer service did improve already.. yesterday i went to espirt with ester.. tat lady damn kind... she seems like no customer liao.. kept serving us.. ask us this and ask tat.. even tat "girl" who promoting red earth products.. also ask me whether is she my auntie?? ...........

let me contiue with my trip to gallery hotel ba... i passby a bridge where i use to walk with louis.. yesterday i had a nitemare abt something had happened to him.. while today i walk to a place where both of us came before... let me recall back a lot of memories.. seriously, in life i did met a lot of kind souls ard me.. quite fortunate... wat am i asking now.. i guess wat i want now.. maybe is a stable relationship.. dun ask me who wor?? cos... my feelings now are like red and green beans mixing up together.. yesterday... i tot was zen's birthday.. msg him happy birthday... but ended up kana sabo by him.. sian.. :'( he asked me why i never gave tat guy(who bought me roses on my birthday) a chance? guess he treat me as gd friend ba.. but wat did for me for the past week.. really make my heart starting to melt..

half a year... had i forgotten someone who was used to be so impt in my life? guess slowly i had forget abt the feelings i had for him... we are just very good friends... he promised me tat he will help me to take things from jil.. guess he won't be tat good... he won't go and collect for me... he rather stay at home and sleep or played game.. hai~~~ when will my fairy tale story landed on me?

at that moment when i enjoyed my day so much.. things happening really good for me.. seriously... i had everything i wan for currently.. got a bunch of caring and loving cousin.. got a bunch of good friends.. no matter wind or sunnny.. they will always be there for me.. got a group of strangers who i dunno wishes me happy belated birthday.. parents love me... still got jil and xuer concern towards me... watever i want for birthday.. if can meet their budget.. they will try to buy for me... so sweet.. things really going great.. tat i can't deny...

guess a few months later.. got to be back to my quiet mode.. a shocking news came out from dad's mouth.. which i can't accept it... yesterday went to take my book from km.. haha.. he saw me starting to burst into tears... but never predicted... the rain was tat heavy... it seems like understand me.. when i wanted to cry... they sky had already cry beforehand.. seems like the thunder had strike me... it lets me recall tat how i lose my cousin in 2004....how tempermental am i when i know he going to pass away.. how i throw my temper towards my friend.. and yet they still forgive me.. how i cry at orchard mrt station.. it turns out to be a huge stone landed on my heart.. maybe is kind of kinship which i feel... last time when my cousin pass away.. still got "A" at my side.. a few months later.. who will be at my side? will i cry at the funeral? will everything changes? will there be a dispute for the fortune? seriously i dun care wat he left down.. cos i am not interested in tat.. i can feed myself using my own hand.. i know.. currently only can earn enuff money for myself plus a bit of allowance to give my family.. no point of wat.. i still have to carry on with my journey to provide a better living for my parents.. they love me as much as i love them.. when i wanted to post this out.. is when my mood had reaches the low end of myself..

my good friends.. though i will be meeting u all later.. pls don't ask me to take care.. let me stay as strong as possible.. dun wish to let my parents to know how i feel now.. i guess they thinks i old enuff to know how to think and handle my feelings..

my problem....................................................................

erm.. last nite i got really a sweet dream... some of my dreams do come truth.. but i really hope tat this dream will come truth.. i had met someone who i love... hehe.. but too bad.. i had forgotten how u look like..

jiejie been warning me... learn your lesson liao hor.. dun tat easily fell in love again.. erm.... seriously yesterday nite... it was really a very sweet dreams.. i had been thinking abt how tat guy look like... haha... :P guess maybe i am too tired.. didn't had a big break through for my work.. why.. am i tat stupid.. i can't even solve tat..

min arh min arh.. u getting more and more gone case.. more and more lazy.. more and more stupid.. can go die liao...

hehe.. today is my birthday.. erm.. no no.. 2 hours ago.. was my birthday.. today nothing much special.. just went back office as normal.. but during lunch.. my colleague gave me a surprise.. by treating me at cartel.. hehe.. erm.. they sort of know.. i got to go soon liao.. but i will miss them.. tot of bringing rocher for them tomorrow.. after work.. i went over to cineleisure to watch movie.. hehe.. the 40 year old virgin was good.. damn funny.. plus full house.. so worried tat the tickets will be sold.. cos i only reach there around 7.05... hehe.. he bought me a bouquet of roses.. really surprise cos i tot he will me a bear.. after movie.. we went for dinner.. actually thinking of crown or parkway or changi airport.. just nice 36 was here.. so i chose changi.. lala.. of cos he ll lah... it was my birthday... went over to T1 swensen.. got a free firehouse ice-cream.. yummy... delicious..

erm..sort of today i also know why me and another guy doesn't work out.. cos we know each other for too long.. erm..... sort of a bit pity.. but guess it is over... btw, my grandpa had discharged already.. but.. he never went for operation......

tuesday, went out with my colleague to orchard... we watched transporter 2.. tat guy was cool...after tat she went back hm.. and i went shopping for a pair of shoes.. ended up bought a pair of heels..

monday, was really shagged day for me.. cos i really very tired after two days of chalet... and after work i went to visit my grandpa.. and boss talk to me abt whether i want to stay or dun want to stay...

fri, sat and sun.. i enjoyed myself a lot.. thanks pple... should i said out wat i got for birthday?? ok.. i shall list all out....

1) 3 necklace - (one apple, one dragonfly and one seashells)
2) 3 pairs of earing - (one bear-->sliver, one dangling, one pair of 18k dolphins)
3) a cute bear wearing a friendship band.. it means me and her will be forever good
friend.. hehe.. right??
4) a cup
5) delicious.. hehe.. dkny perfume wor...
6) 2 bags...
7) two cards..
8) swimwear which i always wanted to buy...
9) vodka vanilla plus unknown --> bcos i haven take from jil.. and he is nagging me
to collect it from him asap.... so..........
10) a bouquet of flowers...
11) a big cushion..
12) a cartel treat...
13) hongbaos..
14) a dolphin braclet...
15) a cushion story book..
16) guess this one is for esterling to fill in.. lol.. :P
17) ........................ --> for u to fill u wat u want to give me..

seriously... today looks damn shag and haggard... really very tired of two days of fun end enjoyment.. life been really great for the past weekend.. everybody shower me with care and love.. seriously i really enjoyed my birthday celebration a lot... guess this will only be once.. cos it was an expensive celebration... had been discussing the matter of changing job or not.. guess all my family members know abt it.. they all encouraged me to take up this new challenge...

yesterday nite.. i was discussing this matter with both my good friends... they will support me no matter wat i choose in the end.. but in a future propective view.. is to choose something better... guess i also agree with them..

hai~~~ this week life been really too dramatic.. things had been happening really good and really bad.. guess wat had happened????

MY GRANDPA IN HOSPITAL

so wat?? wat so big deal abt it... erm.. if i am not wrong.. now.. the doctor suspecting he got cancer... now.................. can see tat my dad quite sad abt it... as to be a daughter of his..... i die die also must go hospital to see my grandpa.. no matter how tight my schedule.. no matter tat i had to take leave or off or watever.. he was being admitted on two days ago... till now i had never stepped in hospital to visit.. guess i going to scold by my grandma very soon.. she will said i unfillal and there goes her story.. blah blah.... hai~~~

my chalet going on.....

so wat again?? too dramatic... one side was sad..one side was happy... maybe tat's is wat called neutral in life...

got a new job........

yesterday went for the course.. my course mate told me.. i had actually make up my mind.. just want pple to said tat it is good... and i should go for it.. guess wat he said was right.. it shows tat the course was working effectively for him.. while for my case.. guess i had neglect my skills and sort of.. giving it up.. hai~~~~~ guess later on.. got to talk to my boss abt this matter...

erm... i got really a nice boss and a great bunch of colleagues.. though i got a job offer now.. but.. i really dunno wat to do.. felt so lose?? is the pay that tempts me to go or the company or ???????????

parents wanted me to work in the new company as pay was much more higher than the current one tat i had.. but... sor of couldn't bear to leave here now.. hai~~~ why must i make decision.. where i had to make decision..

actually wanted to celebrate my 21th birthday with kor before he leave.. but guess he was too busy ba.. no time for me. i leave early.. guess he must be very angry abt it... hai~~~ been reflecting on my journey back home..... tears started to roll down.. but.... once i opened up my magic book.. tears dry up le. hai~~~

erm.. got a shocked when i wake up in the morning.. my friend sms me.. ask me to reply her when i got up... sort of got 3 miss call by a buddy of mine to wake me up in the morning.. cos i requested morning call from him.... saw the msg of my another friend... asking me to attend a dinner and dance with her.. erm.. shocking news.. had never attend a dinner and dance before in my entitled life till now...

hai~~~ in the meanwhile i had to wait for a phonecall which makes me to change my phone to vibrate mode.. waiting seems like so hard.. just want to know the result whether i fail or had pass tat interview.. and i need to get back to my lecturers too.. hai~~~

waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting..........................

now i started to hate to wait.............................

saw this title.. am i anything to you??

i actually had went to bed but turn on my lights again... sort of a lot of things floating in my mind.. nothing seems to be clear in mind.. wat should i want... seems like the course had start to lose the power in my life... i started to be a wander soul again.. omg.. how can i landed in such state again.. took such a long time to recovered from this.. now... hai~~~

these past few weeks or days.. all my cousins had started to help me to plan out for my chalet... and help to prepare stuffs for me.. it is like a a whole family outing again.. cos out of my surprise my granny will be joining us too.. but duno why.. still feel very lose and empty.. seems like these few year i am at a losing end where i starting to lose a lot of things... i ......... though these few days i been chatting with him online.. but those things tat happened to him.. really stunned me.. why?? but i started to lose the feelings towards him.. maybe times passes really long.. get to get on with my life.. but.. dunnoooooooo why i feel so puzzled again and again... i guess i am very INDECISIVE.. i dunno wat i want in life.. wat i want to do..

at the end of the post, i can only said... I LOSE MY WAY AGAIN... BUT I WANT TO FIND IT BACK BY MYSELF...... MUST LEARN TO BE MORE DECISIVE..

yesterday nite had a nightmare.. tears been rolling down my cheeks... wat does tat means?? kor is leaving me.. he won't be celebrating my birthday with me.. kinda miss him when he leaves.. normally is he who pamper me.. and take care of me.. but i also hope tat within tat half a year he is away... i will have some changes in me.. really miss the times tat i had my black forest cake downstairs.. when i was celebrating my 18th birthday.. now... the fact is he will be leaving soon.. sob sob.. :'(

thursday..sort of had things to handle.. left office late.. reached there late.. then when i reached home.. was already quite late.. but had to finish stuffs tat i had brought back.. should express my thanks to kk.. cos he helped me a lot tat day.. thanks buddy.. next week or the week following will meet up with u and treat u... :P since tat was wat i promised... maybe on my birthday tat day hor..

friday.. sort of body immune system getting worst.. or maybe i haven really recovered.. and again i stay up late night.. so body system abt haywire.. went back to see doctor and complaint abt the antibotics.. 2 tablets 3 times a day. imagine 6 tablets for a day which led to my gastric pain.. therefore i had to stop it and changed the medicine.. if i contiune to get mc.. i guess my boss will kill me... although i might change job...

hai~~~~ today very no mood sia.. wat should i do? came popping on my mind again.. hai~~~~~ should i go for tomorrow interview?? my boss today talked to me about my contract.. i haven signed it.. and why i haven signed.. yupe.. i did got counter offer... but i just dunno how to bring it up to her.. i know tat interview might nt be able to be success.. feeling so confuse.. got stuck again.. wat should i do.. do i still go for tat interview or stay as wat i am now.. but the problem is i won't satisfy lor.. cos the pay over there was much more higher than wat i am having now.. as for human nature.. it really tempts me to work over there.. the disadvantages was tat.. definitely it will have more polictics that i expected.. hai~~~ pple been encouraging me to go over to try it out the interview.. since it has no harm.. but by tomorrow i got to sign my contract? should i sign or should i nt? should i wait for my opportunity to comes? or ????? wat exactly should i do??? Got the sense of gulit in my mind.. of wat should i do.. cos this contract came in really late.. tat's why i had my plans of finding job else where.. now it comes.. it makes me puzzled.. hai~~~ can someone guide me out of this path...

sian... got a terrible day today... went back to school early in the morning but i am late.. luckily tat lecturer was sitting over there waiting for me.. she was very considerate, in a sense tat she meet me at mac.. therefore i dun need to walk to so far to the mrt station.. but.... daddy sent me to work.. lol.. got stuck at the expressway for quite some time.. today everything been haywire.. hai~~~ sob sob.. sit there 3 hours to solve one stupid question.. "unable to get file from the asp server." what the ****** is this.......... hai~~~~~~ sian.. hopefully i can get it solve by today.. hardly got the mood to start to do programming.. now.. first step already got into deep trouble..

later at nite.. still got to attend my forum.. hai~~~~

yesterday went to watch red shoes.. erm.. still ok lah.. but anton told us not nice.. overall the conclusion was the ending really sucky... my friend asked me whether i want to join his "forum club".. haha.. tat's was a pretty good idea.. cos got someone to accompany me to............ (fill in the blanks yourself ba.. ) but.....................

my leader called me last nite.. told him tat situation i am in now.. he will help me later.. we shall see wat will happen...

thursday.. really skipped my lesson and stay in office trying my best to finish up my stuffs which was supposed to be finish by friday.. but when the moment i open the other two forms.. i wanted to faint.. it was in the mess.. i spend almost one and half hour to finish up one of the form then started to do coding.. tears also want to drip down liao.. i know busy was fun.. but.. nt at that moment when my body haven really recovering.. reaching 2am... my eyes can't take it.. koonz......... went to bed.. the next day, really bad.. can't wake up on time. sob sob.. :'(

friday... finally finish my work at 5pm.. hai~~ quite late.. luckily.. customer did not complaint.. after tat went out with ah-jie to her favourite place to help her to release her stress.. then sort of plan a bit for my birthday..

sat... went out with my mum to get my phone repair.. then went down to bugis to buy stuffs.. erm.. bought 2 tops... alamak.. spent money again... oh.. i bought 1 bag too.. hehe.. at nite went to meet kim and carina for dinner.. and i bought another pair of earings..... die.. spent too much money this week...

sun... Carina accompany me to go supermarkets to buy some stuffs for my birthday.. then i went to library to check my email. in case there were some changes from my client.. lucky... dun have.. then i dun need to work.. :P we went to starbucks to loiter a while... then head back home..

this week been very shagged for me.. guess my body immune system is getting weaker... just recovered nt long ago.. now virus back again.. antibotics too strong for me.. causing my gastric very pain.. tat makes me to stop all my medicine.. hai~~~ today.. eyes like closing soon.. plus.. received a phone call from .............. makes me more puzzled..

hai~~` today should had listen to my parents to stay at home and rest. Instead of staying at home to rest, i went to work.. erm... sort of tons of work waiting for me to complete.. alamak.. this is my second project.. hope i won't ruin it.. to me, it is quite a big project.. i hope i won't ruin it.. but actually i got something urgent to do... the deadline is on friday.. can i finish it?? i guess cannot.. tmr got to skip tat session.. and do my stuffs... then i can start my project.. i can't focus.. then next monday going for a course.. (should be confirm ba!!) i guess after tat gt to go back to office to do my stuffs again.. hai~~~

something which i am nt sure was.. this coming friday.. how?? wat should i do?? xuer ask me to go to her chalet..... after seeing her and jil....... i .............. sometimes things won't last for forever.. maybe let the memories flow thru your life will be better.. at least u won't feel tat painful.. cos it was in the past.. and of cos u will find someone better and said thanks to your past.. otherwise u won't had such a gd future partner.. am i right to say tat? or maybe i am being too emotional... or i let emotion to lead my life??

hai~~~ these few mths been falling sick tat often.. hw come?? why my immune system getting more and more weak.. even the doctor asked me to take care.. he asked me to go back to see him if my temperature keeps remain at tat high.. he even gave me two days mc.. but i guess tomorrow i will be going back to office.. need to do some stuffs and it was urgent.. so die die also must go back office.. today my colleague suppose to coach me.. but due to i fall sick.. he never came back office today.. so paiseh.. how can i delay the work...

supposely to meet yy they all on thursday to go changi airport to have swensen and chit-chatting session.. but i guess it will be cancel.. cos i got a course to attend on thursday.. i guess i most likely won't attend, i will be quite busy lately.. got to handle a new project... hopefully i can do well...

friday... hai~~~ i got to make up my mind.. my friend jio me go chiong.. but my health like getting worst.. should i go chiong with her??? erm.. or should i accompany my cousin.. hai~~~ how?? wat should i do??

yesterday her student ran off from school... hai~~~ it makes her feel so lethargic after rushing here and there.. but luckily.. the police managed found her at ard 9..

erm.. these few days been out so terribly tat my pocket got a big hole without realising. i realise one thing these two weeks.. i guess everyone got feed by him till we gain a few kgs... can u imagine tat?? it is only two weeks before he going ns... we been enjoying ourselves so much.. wahaha.. last wednesday, we went to watched movies and after tat we went to play pool.. AGAIN i had to remind everyone abt my chalet on the 22nd of OCT.. lol..we had tons of chocolate tat day.. but missymouse didn't even have a bite?? why?? i tot she like chocolate a lot... maybe she dun like dark chocolate ba...

monday feelings was like heavy rain and thunder...... cos..... nothings seems to be right happening.. hai~~~ something happened at home.. plus.. got a sms from my friend's ex bf telling me tat she admitted hospital.. hai~~~ feeling really down.. cos.. we used to be such close friends.. but now.. such things happened.. she sms me and tell me.. dun worry, i won't die so early.. i still want to sing birthday song with u........ hai~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tuesday, i went out with my friend which i met at a project.. hehe.. we went shopping but i couldn't grab anything tat i like.. maybe bcos my mood wasn't tat good.....she promised she will accompany me to get my 21th birthday clothes.. wahahaa... :P

wednesday, we went to ps to watch movies.. sort of like a small gathering.. i enjoyed myself.. thanks missymouse, yy, anton and kelvin..

thursday, yeah~!! one week of break before my classes starts.. so wen out with yy n kelvin.. this time round..we went to marina again........... this time round i didn't eat much.. after tat we went to starbucks to chat for a while.. but i am glad tat we all kept our promises.. sms each other when we reached home.. =)

friday.. went to meet my cousin.. but gt a surprise when i saw my rejected giro application form....... hai~~~ will explain it in another post ba...

sat.. went down to settle my stuffs.. and after tat at nite.. i met the guys for dinner.. thanks to kelvin's mum for tat treat.. after tat we went over to geylang and had bean curd... erm.. i felt so bloated tat day.. now i starting to lose my voice.. i saw a watch tat i liked a lot tat day.. my aunt wanted to buy for me but i rejected her offer.. maybe i shall buy tat watch to give to myself as my 21th birthday.. :)

sun.. met carina for dinner at parkway.. bought 2 pairs of earing.. 1 ring.. so....
btw i met anton and his friend at parkway..

today had a lunch with my boss and my colleague.. tmr.. got to start to do my programming.. hai~~~ next two weeks.. i will be going course for two days at microsoft.. hai~~ i scare later i dun understand anything they said.. i am so touched today.. ah-fen told me she bought something for me.. and will pass it to me when she come to my chalet.. i tot she forget me already.. but i am glad.. our friendship are still lasting.. it really had been a long long long long time i ever met her and joy joy.. i miss them so much... use to hang out tat often... now.. once in a bluemoon... :'(

erm.. nothing much happened nowadays.. but i am going to start to do my first survey form.. wahahaa.. alamak..can u imagine someone who dun like programming stuffs to work in an IT firm... i dunno.. i guess everything is being fate.. i guess someone had already path out my life for me. When i was so aimless, don't know what to do. Going to agency to look for jobs and working part-time for my ex-boss. Someone called me down for an interview. Yeah, i got that job after not long after tat interview. There it start my IT work life.. it is hectic when there are lot of projects on hand. Currently i am still very new, therefore there isn't that much of projects for me to handle.

Your Soul Number is FOUR.

Responsible, conscientious, and rather serious, you expect to work for what you want in life, and you don't appreciate frivolity, laziness, or inconstancy in other people. You have a strong sense of duty and you need to be productive. You are very capable in practical affairs and may have mechanical abilities.

A well organized, structured, disciplined lifestyle appeals to you and you prefer security to excitement and surprises. You love tradition and don't question the conventions, rules, and methods you were brought up with. You think in clear, simple, practical terms and are honest and square in your dealings with others. Basically conservative, you may distrust the unfamiliar and anything you feel might threaten your orderly and peaceful existence. You never take risks unless you have laid a firm foundation for success. You may lack imagination and the desire to learn new ways. Also, you do not allow yourself to relax and be carefree often enough. Part of the reason for this is that others depend upon your practical abilities so much that when you do have free time, you may find yourself fixing someone's car, helping a friend with their taxes, or doing some other chore. Try to avoid becoming a workaholic. You deserve to play sometimes too!


***i agree.. i cannot sit there doing nothing.. but others.. shall let u guys to decide and let me know..

yesterday been staying in office until quite late.. surprising.. almost everyone OT till ard 7 plus.. but i ended in office until 8 plus. Got to finish some stuffs, in case monday i can't take it or i going to be the slowest person to pack up. We planned to go for tat Nokia Starlight Movie.. wahaha.. :P Furthermore tat was the movie i wanted to watch but nobody want to accompany me.. sad sia.. i so friendles.. must find me more friends to accompany me to watch movie.. hehehe.. ;) After tat went back home for dinner.. then ard 10 went out again.. luckily daddy sent me there, arbo ester going to arbish me liao.. met her for a drink, it had been a long time tat i met her. She brought me to this cafe iguana where she got drunk.. hehee.. erm.. seriously, i think i got a bit blur out after having my second drink but i always had ziying's word in mind.. therefore i am fine.. lol... but the drinks there are expensive...

today went to work part-time.. erm.. am i crazy?? i only had 2 days of rest last weekend.. now i burnt out my weekend.. hai~~~

My parents been asking me to ask him to come to my chalet. But i guess u guys will be disappointed. he won't be attending my chalet... haha.. so dun ask me why or who.. i had already tried to tell him, but i got no reply from him.. so.... we shall see when he thinks he want to come ba... probably i guess he won't be there..

Nowadays i seems like to watch a lot of korean series drama due to my mum n my granny.. alamak.. i catch every monday n tuesday.. now i fall in love with another one which is still showing in SCV now.. on every sat 10.30pm.. so cute.. i had finish watching tat da chang jin las weekend but i haven watch the last espisode.. cos my mum return to her friend liao.. sian..

never been blogging since last sat, this week been flying over so fast, tat i couldn't even catch whole of myself.

Last Sunday, went to Soo Yuan's chalet at East Coast. My shifu aka turtle, wake me up so early at 12pm, arbish *_*!! I feel so tiring yet they did nt go cycling at all! *-* But we did went for a bowling session, i score 117 for the first match. The second match was terrbile, it shows tat i dun have passion to do things. I only like it for a while, and give up after tat moment. haha.. =p This gives me the feeling of having a chalet for my 21th birthday. After considering all factors, i decided to have to chalet for my birthday. BUT dun be extreme happy/unhappy abt tat, i had nt book the chalet yet. Still remember a few years back we celebrate his birthday at swensen, now he is turning 21.



hehehe.. :P

Monday, been rushing finish it up the project on hand with my colleague for the whole day... But again we went to CAFE DEVINE for lunch.. erm.. considered ok lah.. after having lunch for so many times at there.. There was a client over there with us, i realise tat my communication need to brush up plus my english.

Tuesday, again working on the same project. But i guess a few more weeks or few more months later, you will see my second workpiece. You shall be able to comment about it. It takes a lot of time and effort to finish it up, i just helped out a bit here and there.. wahaha...

Wednesday, went lunch with my friend and shop for a while before returning back to office. Guess what?? There are changes for my second workpiece. Wow.. so long.. but the art director praise us. He said overall it was good. I feel so overjoyed. This is the second time me and my shifu team up to finish up one project. Wahaha.. :P
After work, i went to meet kelvin, winston and soo yuan for dinner. AGAIN i went to burger king. erm... i just had it for lunch.. but never mind.. since the guys will be going back army soon.. i shall nt be tat picky and have tat again. After tat we had a sudden thoughts of going East Coast for Coffee. I stunned... I never tot tat those guys will be tat spendrift as i do. We went Coffee bean and i tried out the white chocolate vanilla, it was nt bad. Guess what?? We spend almost 2 hrs there.. helping kelvin to prepare for his army life soon..

Thursday, i went for my course after my work. At first, i tot my colleague will nt be attending it. She thinks it was very rush for her bcos she need to go for driving and she got tons of things to do.. so.... nobody going to accompany me. Surprise... She asked me wat am i going to have for dinner? Erm... Yesh!! she is going with me.. hehe.. Ok lah.. break my promise.. and therefore this week had to work hard to keep my promise..

Friday...... shall contiune at nite.. otherwise my boss will yelled at me later.. ;) tata...

haha.. yesterday i went to eski pub.. erm.. ok lah.. nt very cold.. order a drink called bubble gum.. wahaha.. my friend said just like me.. so bubbly.. bleh.. dun vomit out arh.. guess i am back to normal le.. i talked to him last afternoon.. asking for my 21th birthday present.. hehe.. he asked me go batam to celebrate.. wahaha.. :P i really dun mind.. if u are going to bring me there.. but i know it is impossible.. pple been asking me whether do i still miss u.. guess i am already half way through.. these few months.. met a lot of new pple.. and learn a lot of stuffs that i couldn't find it in school... erm.. btw.. after going to eski.. we went ms... lol.. :P tat boss came to talk to us sia.. but inside gt a lot of ang mo... he came forward and ask me.. are you ok? erm.. i was like.. i am fine.. wahahaha.. jil kept asking me go back home.. bleh.. :P i am fine... lalalalalalaal...

today actually wanted to go ah-beng chalet.. but ended i went to met up with peggy and carina for dinner at tampines.. alamak.. again at tampines.. i been at tampines for the past few weeks.. hai~~~ AGAIN i had billy bombers for dinner.. alamak.. i had tat last few days ago... from wednesday till sat.. nothing seems cheap...
billy bombers --> thai express --> thai food --> billy bombers --> BBQ food..
hehehe.. i can predict wat i am going to have for tomorrow.. BBQ food.. lol.. so long never had it liao... actually today wanted to go out to celebrate ester's birthday but.. never go... otherwise.. i will really knock out.. cos till now my stomach still feel really painful...

this week been great... i finally finish my vol project and i back in office.. wahaha.. :P finally got a chance to work in office.. hehe.. :P

for the past few days i went to billy bomber and thai express for lunch.. wahah.. i spent almost 2hrs for my lunch break..but i am broke now... today i went to thai food again.. hehe.. but it was nice.. i like it so much.. wahaha... :p

btw.. i went to watch herbie already... not bad.. quite funny...

yesterday course was ok lah.. not tat boring.. get to know more pple.. :P we make a promise.. if within 3 mths, we never acheived wat we had promised.. i will have to treat them.. but if he is going to promote again.. he shall treat me makan.. wahhaa.. let me think of something expensive... lalaa... his pay is so much higher than me... so i guess it would be find lah... lalalalaala... 3 mths later, we will know who win who lose... bleah.. :P

tonite.. my colleague.. wanted to bring me to that ice pub... wahaha.. :P shiok sia....

my life been going ups and down which i couldn't really handle well.. Last thursday i went to attend the second part of my course. Could i really untie my knot? Tat knot seems like falling deep inside a well. I realise something.. if i dun practise what i learned during that 3 days, the power i had will lose in any minutes.

been very busy for the past 3 weekends, do nt really have time for anything else.. but last sat, i managed to seek permission to leave early but ended up i still went off ard 10pm.. Went down to orchard to meet my friends for a birthday celebration. Out of surprising.. i couldn't flag a cab at lavander or bugis.. Can u believe tat taxi drivers do not want to stop for me.. hai~~ i am late... they will all waiting for me.. i feel so paiseh.. hehe.. but touch sia.. they never abandon me.. hehe.. again!! i did something stupid.. put some fresh cream on my friend's face.. lolo.. shifu.. hai~~~ bcome cream shifu.. who asks him accompany us to go washroom to wash hands.. ended up kana sabo by me.. this weekend.. although i am not working.. got two chalets going on....... erm... still considering.. everything for me now is like all pending.. let me have a break first ba~~


the most scarliest thing for august was tat... i got friends birthday which are contiunously... 26-gx, 27-jil n gary, 28-suicheng, 29-kevin, 3rd sept-soo yuan, 5th-ester... omg...

haha.. i fall sick again.. been keep falling sick for this whole year... two mths ago.. got high fever now... kana attacked by flu virus again.. kor came and find me today.. so sweet.. and he said next week treat me eat sakae.. erm.. listen can liao.. next week than i will know the truth.. never regret to have this kor.. cos he know this week.. i sad sad.. so.. haha.. had a talk with him also.. seriously my feelings really mixed up le.. i really duno wat i wan le.. so tiring.. can give me 1 min to breath...

i know jil, xuer and one of my gd friend when i broke up with my ex.. now.. everything was like in a mess.. xuer asked me.. she tot i fall in love with jil.. hai~~~ jil and my ah-kor is the same.. we know tat we will nt cross over tat line tat we had drawn in the first place. but.. i had crossed over the line tat me and my gd friend drawn.. tot tat attending the forum can help me to unlock my tie.. in the first place it seems like working.. now.. a bit confused again..

yesterday i went to take something from my friend.. finally, i managed to lend it from him.. but he really makes me very irritated.. i dunno why also.. he actually promise to pass to me on friday.. he said he was tired. fine.. i said another day... in a while later.. he msg me.. "i pass to u later.. since i am driving and i need to pass my friend some stuffs" ***** i know i nt your gf but pls respect me a bit can?
the same thing happened again yesterday...

***i delete the following post.

last weekend i went to attend a forum.. erm.. ok lah.. but... i did close my eyes for a while... but sh.......... dun tell anyone.. later sure kana whack by my boss... really tiring.. from 7am to 9pm.. maybe i need to had a hard life.. i cannot sit there for the whole day doing nothing except listening... but the food there was nice.. temasek country club was like a holiday resort from some other countries... i seems like i had left sg for 3 days.. but in fact i am still in sg... luckily got someone send me back hm... daddy was nt free for that whole month... and nobody want to send me back home.. so sad... got no pple pamper me le... hai~~~ but never mind.. all got their happiness le.. hehe...

story to be contiuned... cos i still got to work now..... byebye.... :P

two weeks ago.. i went to ktv with my cousin and followed by tat we went to watch the fireworks over at Marina there.. we even had a pinic over there.. hehe.. bought a lot of food.. i like the potato salad over the liang court.. the green-tea icecream is bagus!! MUST try!!! real taste good but ex..

been slacking all the way on national day's eve..hehe.. :P

went to watch NDP at padang.. sort of it ........... maybe i should not had choose at padang.. so hot over there.. plus.. sit beside an idiotic auntie.. she got the guts to someone smoking over there.. but when she was wrong.. she act damn innocent... wah kao.. no MANNERS!!! so old liao.. still no manners..only how to create trouble..I miss my fireworks show also.. make my day more worst.. the screen were actually blocking my view..sian...

last sat.. went out at 10am.. ended up i reached hm ard 12 midnight.. wah piang.. my leg so painful.. it had been such a long time that i ever went out for so long.. maybe tat can test my patience for tomorrow forum.. hai~~ i went to meet my poly in the afternoon.. we had lunch and shopping for a while.. then went to swensen for desert.. after tat.. i went to suntec to meet my cousin to catch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.. hehe..:P i like it so much...

When i am young, i been thru stuffs that i thinks really very tough in life. I had never handle well with anything ended with a "ship" before.

In primary school, we had a bunch of friends who are quite close. Furthermore, i got a friend who falls on the same birthday as me. We tends to celebrate birthday together and sabotage each others. Those moments were really very sweet. But definitly we did quarrel before and do a lot of childish stuffs. Slowly we get apart, all of us are no longer tat close anymore. Sometimes just met up for a drink or pool sessions.

While as for secondary school, i tends to got often into friendship problem. Can you believe that? To me, i really stunned. I never tot of that will happen in my life. Sometimes have some family matters but definitely not friendship. As time passes, friendship's problem tends to get into a worst situation where else 3 of us all got hurt. The worst thing was we dragged down another girl who is innocent. It might be a very small matter but seriously i dunno when it bcome so serious. Both of them are very good friends.. we seems like snatching for bf like tat, pushing each other here and there. complicated story where the ending is we are still apart now.

In poly life, things get really smooth. Nothing much happened, just that things around me seems to be worst. Tends to lose a lot in life. Perharps maybe he was walking with me thru my poly days. That's why i feel so happy ba. This coming saturday will be my cousin 1 year anniversary. He passed away at 8.45pm at nite where all of us were nt around. That one month to me was like chao. As normal, i still went to starbucks to revise for my exams. Secretly i went to Changi Airport. I departed there to went over to Aus to find auntie while after a year he left us. Ever since he left sg, he had never ever step into his hometown. At Changi Airport i sort out my thinkings. At tat moments, i wanted to give up everything around me and just concentrate on my studies. I told myself i won't look back with the decision i made or turn back the path. I am wrong, i turn back the path and look for him again. I had never knew he had bcome a habit of mine or something which i couldn't afford to lose. During my examinations period, got a friend motivate me to study. Tat's was tian tian. I knew him thru a chat on my birthday. Maybe his is my guardian angel for tat period of time. He very poor thing, i always bully him and he always hear me cried. I cried too much behind of him but he will never knew the truth. When he was aboard for more than one month. I was like counting down the days n i never knew tat i had actually mess up my life during that period of time. I got tian tian into trouble. I feel really regret, he just a very good friend cos he always lend me a lending ear when tears following down. I tends to act strong in front of others but once i am alone it might turn out another way. During my examination period, there were times i wanted to give up but due to the support given by tian. I manage to got my best results in my entire poly life. He was like threatening me, he kept remind me have u forgetten wat u promised your cousin? Yes, i do remember wat i promise him. Really thanks for tat period u motivate me study when he was away.Maybe i always unlucky, nt long after my birthday kor admitted hospital due to accident. Hai~ i went to visit him but once i heard he going for operation, i left the place. He actually expects me to stay there and accompany him. Sorry, i just dun have the courage to stay there. When Siok admitted hospital, i guess i scared my friend. It was on a friday nite, after standing outside waiting to visit my grandma who just came out from the operation theatre. Ard 8, i had to rushed all the way to tan tock seng to visit siok. She was lying helpless there, seriously my heart feel damn painful. Someone who is the same age as me and same birthday as me, lying there. Nt more than 5 mins in the ward, i rushed down. I found an excuse to go down. MY tears was rolling when i was walking out of the ward. Imagine how helpless i am, i called my kor, him, jiefu and someone else(A).. only A picked up the call.. him and jiefu was in army... while kor was having karate.. so poor thing, i dun have a girl friend to call. The next day, xiao and i went over to accompany her for the whole day. There were tons of words that we wanted to express out just tat we all keep it. and never want to reveal it out.

My working life... my colleagues are very nice, they treats me as a small kid. They willing to teach me and explain to me. Before my working life starts, i lose so much things that i dunno how to stand again. There might have loses or gain in life. This time round i am a bore loser. My guy good friend or my dear sister (Mr Gary)... i know i always get into trouble.. u been asking me to forget him cos he hurts me too deep le... thanks for your concern for these months.. i really very lost cos i haven find the right way to carry on to walk my path...

Conclusion:
Never knew tat it will be so painful when he was without with me. Maybe is just like when u got on smoking and now u need to quit smoking. The kind of feeling is really unbearable.

Never knew that losing a kin was tat painful. And it makes me more to cherish kins around me.

Thanks to my parents and relatives for showering me with care and concern in my life

Never felt tat lost before, guess next time round when i do things. I MUST use head to think and avoid unnecesary misunderstandings.

Thanks to all my friend who been thru with me till now.

sian.. yesterday went back hm.. got another kor msg... alamak... ANOTHER break up for this week!!!! hai~~~ called him and chit chat... erm.... he got my ex bf number.. wow.. power..... erm......... he asked me wants or not... i stunned... if we never break up.. i will never know him.. i duno whether i should thanks him or not.. haha..... no matter wat happened, life still have to goes on.. maybe we still can be friends... next time we can meet up to go for a drink.. but OF COS is HE treat.. wahaha.. one thing for sure.. he very gentleman.. and nice guy... he treats his gf very good wor... still remember last time.. i went chalet with xinzhi, weeling and peggy on the first day.. can u imagine we bought how many bottles of vodka, hooch n others??? WE BOUGHT A TOTAL OF 21 BOTTLES!! wahahah.. :P i drank abt 11 bottles.. alamak.. tat day a bit drunk... haha.. hurt my head... then.. he knew abt it.. cos i told kor.. then... NAG N NAG N NAG... he even want to come down and bring me hm.. cos i promised him i won't drink... lolo.. :P ended up he msg my friend.. cos tat time M1 still dun have free incoming calls mah... of cos my good buddies help me lied lor.. bleh... :P considered as sweet memories ba.. watever i wants.. he will get for me.. TAT's WAS IN THE PAST!!! kor been asking me.. why last time u want to break up with him?? Reason?? I DUNNO...

today damn sleepy.... had bad day after work.. hai~~ ard 7 plus.. went back office to get my key.. and took 36 back hm... BUT DAMN... the bus was already damn pack.. the bus driver still asked us to squeeze.. i was like a victim sia.. at amber garden there.. there were pple alighting.. and pple coming up.. tat auntie.. dun want to move away.. then no choose... i had to move backwards to let them go down.. irritating sia.. wah piang.. got one guy step on my toes sia... after wearing high heels for one day ... leg damn painful liao..still step on me.. eat SHIT!!! at parkway more worst.. pple was like scare to miss the bus-stop.. pushing here and there.. the auntie again.. stand there like a stature...sian.. again me be the victim... after tat......... i should be alighting at the next bus stop.. but... the bell spoilt.. miss my bus-stop.. wah biang.. i tot i already avoid taking 36 at peak hours.. how come still so packed?? i suggest tat hor... should have double-decked 36 mah.. during peak hours.. arbo... everyday very jialat.. got to squeeze until siao.. or some short services lah.. u know wat i saw just now.. I SAW AN OLD MAN.. WAS STANDING WHEN THE BUS WAS PACKED.. HE WAS CARRYING AN UMBERALLA WITH HIM... ERM.. IF THE BUS DRIVER SUDDENLY BRAKE.. I GUESS HE WILL FALL DOWN.. BUT NOBODY OFFERING TO HIM SEAT!!!! WAH PIANG.. HEARTLESS CREATURE SIA!!! EVEN THOSE PPLE SITTING AT THE GREEN SEATS.. STILL YA YA PAPAYA.. SLEEPING OR LOOKING ELSEWHERE!!! HAI~~~ sad sia..

yohoo!!! finally my graduation day le... i got my diploma le... YESH!!! i did it liao!! finally completed another phase of my life... now got to proceed on to next step le.. wat should i do nexT?? work for the rest of my life?? or contiune my studies... erm.. seriously.. i hope one day i will throw my hat high and celebrate i got my degree le.. should i take it?? Give me one year to think carefully ba.. seriously... i dunno wat should i do next time.. i am like aimless.. just want to make a living now.. nothing much..

today went back school... erm.. so long never go back le.. hehe.. have the craving to eat ban mian.. but miss it... too busy today.. got my cert liao.. follow by went to collect a USB hub from my mentor who is my fav lecturer.. thanks him for the 3 years.. he helped me a lot.. he is very kind wor.. just like MR ONG.. can u still remember who is MR ONG??? We went for the buffet.. but the food was only so-so.. wow.. today didn't take much photos in school... miss a chance to take with Carina and Xinzhi... but took some secret pics wor.. sh... secret.. it will not be display out.. haha... guess who??? bleh.. nt saying out.. BUT I TOOK PIC WITH MY SHIFU.. hehe... BOTAK KING!!! bleah... :P

After tat we went to suntec.. and have NYDC.. actually didn't want to join in.. ah-fen pursue us to go.. hehe.. cos after tat meeting kor mah.. so.. tot of going back home and changed first but.. ended never go hm... met my colleague at city link.. hehe.. she congras me.. lalala.. saw my yandao colleague at suntec too wor.. really surprise.. guess i got a crush on him.. but i duno which country he come from.. lalalaa.... i order iced irsh cream..... erm.. very BIG cup.. stunned... erm..at first taste nt sweet at all.. but dunno hw come after coming back from the ladies.. it taste so SWEET!! guess maybe shufen or shifu or duno who else added sugar in.. hehe.. :P we ordered two pizzas... wow... taste delicious.. so CHEESY... SHIOK ARH... but POOR SHIFU.. going to die of COUGH SOON.. HAHA.. guess he going to have a SICK BIRTHDAY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY WOR!!! bleah :P Ard 6 plus i went off with them.. hehe.. never join ester, jol and others to take pic and shop shop around..

Ard my workplace.. kor called me.. so went to tower records to find him.. walked straight to carrefour.. haha.. wanted to get sushi but ended up we had polar.. GUESS where we go???? We went KBOX.. haha.. i am a lousy singer.. hehe. .just go there for fun.. took some pics over there too.. even record how kor sing.. wahaha.. keke... :P erm.. at first ok lah.. but slowly... something happened.. i guess he sense tat.. trying his best to make me smile.. try to act strong in front him.. and swallow away all my tears.. haha.. can u sense it?? i dunno leh.. but i can tell you something KOR IS A GOOD SINGER!!!

after hearing tat story of my friend... hai~~~ landed me with sleepless nite everyday... finally.. yesterday got to sleep......

Today is my graduation day wor.. hehe.. my BIG day... but... sian.. dunno why cannot feel tat happiness... dunno wat to write also.. hai~~~

today i went to tat zpop concert.. hehe.. not bad.. quite enjoyed myself.. ard 12... i met km... hehe.. went for a walk at east coast.. cos i was finding place to drink.. after tat call k.. but he was outside with his friends.. .then asked leo too.. hehe.. then... leo said he tired.. lazy to come out.. then ended up i went to 7-11 to buy.. after drinking for 2 cans.. l called km again.. asked where are we know.. in the end.. we went out together and drink.. haha.. met h too (l's friend)... we went to interworld which is near everyone's house.. dun need to drive.. tat's good.. they ordered SKYJUICE for me... wat!!! no choice.. stick with my skyjuice lor.. they went to play pool.. then i sit there alone.. sad sia.. but... later they ordered ANOTHER jug... hehe.. a bit tempting... i drank too... bleah... :P btw..when we sat there not long after tat.. there are girls sitting beside the guys wor... .hahha.. .:P but.... they asked them to go away... are they consider nice guys? tat is for u to find out.. bleah.........know a girl called ann... she tot tat KM was my bf or someone going after me... haha... is tat the truth.. i duno leh.. i know we are friends only.. hehe..

why i choose to post a message again?? today i received a call...... erm.... duno why pple ard me all f33ling sad and down... after hearing wat he said.. i drop my tears too......although the person who get hurt is not me.. maybe i use my feelings to do things instead of my "pig" brain.. i never had w|sh the ending had come..

the four of us know each of us... at the same time.. we played mahjong together.. played da dee together.. seriously.. i really do miss that period of time.. maybe as times passes.. we started to change and react differently.. are we still friends?? All of u are like my da jiejie and da korkor.. of cos i treated all of u as gd friends... i asked for my 21th birthday present.. i got it.. but.... dun really want to take it.. i dun want a broken glasses....... maybe not everyone of us.. but most of us got our heart broken broken into pieces just like the glasses shattered on the floor.... i miss wat we have done in the past.. and not now.. maybe we did not cherish the pple tat ard us.. tat leads to everyone is being sad for this moment..

maybe this might a start for us.. a start for everyone to find someone better.... and recovered from the pain that we had it...

i really miss the period tat we are together... all of u just act like da jie jie and da korkor looking after me this xiao mei mei.. but it will no longer be as in the past le........ i miss u all.........

time passes so fast.. 3 mths of recovering... everyone ard me thinks i am getting better.. hehe.. kana alvin kor suan.. haha... i might have a chance to met him at padang.. we shall see.. maybe we will take some pics.. but of cos using my camera lah..

monday went to catch free movies.. wahaha.. dun need to pay money.. so shiok.. bought a pair of heels of my graduation day... somemore i only pay $5... pple paid for me.. so sweet sia... :P

tuesday... forgot wat i had done sia.. erm...............

wednesday... helped my parents till 1 plus... after tat.. keep telling myself nt to come online.. ended up.. i fall asleep...

thursday.. i pang sai ester n niao ying.. i went hm and sleep.. but i promised ester.. next thursday i will go..

today my cousin pang sai me.. hai~~~ but nvm.. she got me free tickets to watch Zpop concert.. wahaha.. :P

my life without you seems much more simple...next thursday i will be going back to school to take my cert.. tat willl be closing chapter for my poly life.. remember last time i compete with u.. ..........................(sh.. a secret between me and u) maybe if i never stepped into your life... things will be better for you.. seriously.. i did feel guilt and gratitude towards you.... tuesday i hurt my leg.. tat was the first time i never share anyone.. tat pain was so hurting.. in the past.. i will msg u or call u to tell u.. but.... i changed my mind.. last year.. i had a terrible stomache.. u are the one who been accompany me..... i dunno... just now i read my friend's blog.. he post out a message to declare his love towards the girl... the girl needs time to think about it.. wat abt my love life now.........

the answer will be.... i will let nature take its course... after so many years of nt cherishing u....... i lose already.. is my punishment for nt cherishing u when u are at my side........

Thursday... nthing much happened also.. actually ester asked me to meet them to go for a talk at tanjong pagar.. but due to i got to work OT.. therefore i didn't go.. sian.. nowadays.. need to work OT often due to a lot of changes to be done.. no choice.. everything is still not finialise.. i hate testing sia.. is so boring... on my way back to take 36.. i met an auntie.. she asked me "Xiao jie, where is Concrad hotel"? i was stunned for a while.. and started to look ard.. i realised something i lose touch liao.. no longer a street directory liao.. sad sia.. In the end, i still managed to brought her there.. but i missed 4 36s... alamak.. two 36s come at the same time for twice.. sian.. ard 10.. i went to meet my friend.. to pass him the cds.. dunno where to go... or wat to do.. we called out another two friends out.. he went back hm to take keys.. while another one taking a bath.. i also went hm to take bath.. haha..he had to travel tro and fro to pick us up.. lolo.. :P at first we went to hongkong cafe at katong there while waiting for another friend ... erm. .maybe it was unbelievable.. i actually had a dreamt abt it... but it really bcome a reality.. erm.. !!!! ard 12.. went to pick up lao ah-pek.. hehe.. :P he bcame a teacher le.. wahaha..i guess the students are suffereing.. bleah...

friday.. really cannot concentrate on work. .due to slept too late for the past two days.. sian.. after worked when to meet Carina, Kim and their friends.. sort of i am the only extra one there.. but tried to make myself comfortable ba.. diao.. Carina keep suaning me.. hai`~~ she a bit very permissitive... about her FYP.. i ..... maybe provoke her ba.. i only said tat report nt very thick.. she........... i really duno.. she keep saying i got a very good life.. erm.... i dun dare to denied abt it.. when i am down... my friends all very on.. ask them out.. all will be out.. hehe.. thanks pals.. hehe.. tat 3 might be an idiot.. but they always accompany me thru late nite.. got jiefu always hear my sorrows.. got korkor accompany me thru my darkest period.. so.. ok lah.. we went to pastamania for dinner.. she wanted to treat us.. but we put money inside her bag.. then i realise something. she always treat pple eat.. she reminds me of xinzhi.. last time we go eat .. xinzhi always said dun need..she treated us very good.. but very ke xi.. she no longer tat close with me.. she was a very nice friend... but in secondary times.. there were lots of things happening tat were being disclose.. only 3 of us knows abt it.. hai~~

sat.. went out with banana they all.. alamak.. i was LATE for an HOUR.. due to massive traffic jam plus i met an accident.. luckily.. i am ok.. otherwise.. i met be in the hospital now..we went to bugis and walked to doby ghaut.. seriously i dun remember tat i got tell winston tat i dun want to go orchard... hai~~ maybe i too forgetful.. he inisited i said abt tat.. i LL lor...

sun... spent a day with my parents.. hehe.. :P anyway.. now i am broke...

sat went to carina's chalet.. wow.. so crowded.. i wondering if next time i really got open a chalet for my birthday.. will it be so crowded also?? i am always friendless.. will pple come my chalet?? hai~~ sad sia... not bad.. quite fun.. sit there talked with peggy n her bf... plus yy... yy came late.. hehe.. :P

sun.... went out with a bunch of botaks.. of cos plus my good friends... lolo... suppose to meet at 12 but.. i was late.. cos i wake up late.. wahaha.. too early lah.. next time must set later timing mah.. lolo.. :P met yy on bus 72... hehe.. so join her... when i reached there.. we will like the last two to reach there... when we started to shift in for seats.. i told them "someone else is coming also"... they will like stunned.. who? who?? Impossible is gary mah.. he told me he is not coming.. haha.. but in actual fact he will be joining us.. alamak.. he never tell them.. we had a gathering at HAN's... we girls might be going there POP wor.. hehe.. we shall see how.. since.. 3 of them passing out at the same time... after tat went to tampines to collet banana's phone.. erm.. something eeks happened.. a baby vomit milk at yy.. ended yy... got get a new pair of pants... after tat we got no place to go.. ended up heading home.. actually wanted to meet my friend.. but too tired le.. cancel it..

monday... work OT until 7 plus.. sad sia.. last minute changes.. no choice...

Tuesday work OT again.. but today different.. work until 8.30... wtf sia... AGAIN last min changes..sad leh.. now doing testing.. a lot of things to change.. sian.. ended accompany my friend work until 8.30.. today was her last day too.. but i promise her tat on the 27 of july,i will go back school to find her.. paiseh sia.. today hp flat.. got to borrow phone from her to make phone call back.. in case daddy cannot contact me... after tat ard 9... meet my parents to go chinatown.. to get some stuffs.. when i reached home ard 10 plus.. then i finally got my dinner... sian.. now should be going to sleep soon... -_-


today kana heartache sia.. hai~~~ tot tat helping pple might be doing myself a good deed... but.. hai~~ i know the feeling of losing someone close to you.. the determination and courage to fight with illness... tot tat maybe donate some money might can help them a bit ba... they might need financial helps.. when you decided to fight with cancer.. Fighting with cancer.. u need care.. determination.. courage and lots of money... is not cheap to get cure...

around me.. i have 4 relatives tat contracted it.. one out of four survived.. the rest all away le.. i still remember last time... it was a painful way for everyone to walk thru it.. when my uncle got it.. we got shocked by the news.. after operation, he slowly on the process of recovering.. while my cousin a bit unlucky.. he went for operation.. but after one year... it spread already.. too late le.. no cure le.. when my aunt got the report.. the whole family hugged together and cried.. seriously toward my aunt.. it struck her badly.. she called my mum and inform her.. tat time i was at starbucks studying for my coming exams.. seriously.. how i survive thru my third year was... "he was so strong and determination.. you shouldn't had let him down"... when i received the call from my mum.. my heart breaks into pieces.. hardly can believe tat.. how can such thing happened to such a young guy.. maybe it is fated ba.. tat period isn't tat easy to walk thru.. luckily.. i got friends who understand how i feel.. maybe to them i am a crybaby ba.. but couldn't believe i dropped my tears at ochard mrt station.. so many pple there also.. just couldn't control it.. at hm cannot cried.. due to grandma's presence.. we dare not let her know abt it... but as time passes by.. i guess all of us slowly getting use of it.. but the pain that we felt inside our heart is unforgettable.. the most importantly, he will place somewhere in everyone's heart.

erm.. wednesday.. i went out to meet up with yy.. kevin n edmund.. hehe.. this is the first time. .four of us go out together wor.. we went to watch war of the world.. erm.. in middle quite exciting.. but for the front part and end part a bit sian.. hai~~ spoilt the movie.. btw.. we went over to lido to watch... erm.. actually tat day.. i very bad.. asked ed to buy nuggets.. and really buy... then yy said i very bad..:P

Thursday.. I FORGOT TO BRING MY HP.. alamak.. sad sia.. first time without hp.. so torturing.. hai~~ hp bcome a needs and no longer a want for me.. jialat..daddy actually wanted to give me his hp.. but forget it.. ester wanted me to go to an seminar with her.. but... she got no way to contact me.. tot tat i cheat her.. cos the day before.. mao mao went to agency.. and got tat job, usher, at suntec... she tot i am avoiding tat conincidence.. but in actual fact.. i really didn't bring my hp..

Friday.. went to thai express for lunch.. cos tat was my collegue last day.. hai~~ sian.. next time i will be alone at tat place.. hai~~ all treated me like xiao mei mei.. jia lat.... next time if i didn't manage to open the door on time.. guess i will be stuck outside... sad.. she wanted to treat me.. but i said no lah.. she doing her attachment.. $400 per month.. very jialat.. me dun want to be so bad... then.. at nite.. met up with ester for dinner.. lolo.. went to bugis.. again i am LATE!! jialat.. had curry chicken and swensen as dessert.. wahaha.. broke sia..

FINALLY.. went to watch inital D.. hehe.. i like it quite a lot.. oh ya.. yesterday went out with bulldog and edmund to have dinner.. erm.. .ok lah. .first time went out with both of them.. wahaha... AGAIN i am late... went to suki sushi to have dinner.. tat two guys are like siao.. take so many plates.. as if we are ordering buffet.. i ate sashimi le.. finally.. after craving for so long.. got somebody accompany me to eat jap food le.. i duno whether is the manager gave the wrong chance to me or we gave him extra money.. Each of us suppose to pay $25.. ended up he return me $15... We gained extra $15.. wahha after tat.. we went to pacific coffee.... erm.. bulldog order a cake.. sort a dessert for him ba.. but ended ........ hahaha :P i finally try to play 8 balls..wahaha.. i lose sia.. hai~~ sad sad.. erm.. went to classics pool.. erm.. still prefer my MEGA POOL...

wohoo.. .today another girl's outing.. but AGAIN i am late due to traffic jam.. hai~~ but i enjoyed the movie alot.